The bride to be has a child the groom doesn't know about (It's with the father) The wedding is going to be expensive and the child's father (who is not invited, obviously) is planning to ruin it by piping up when the question is asked 'Does anyone know of any just reason...?' I found out through someone's slip of the tongue. Should I tell the bride, go to the police, send the 'Boys' round to him? I'm not invited myself.
2006-07-26 06:41:58 · 58 answers · asked by Harriet 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Your not invited,, i would be more concerned with that
2006-07-26 06:44:22 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
First no a child by a previous partner is not due cause for the marriage to be cancelled (unless the bride to be was married to the previous guy and is not yet divorced!!).
I would speak to the bride and tell her quietly what you have heard. Between you you could then place 2 men that you trust with her secret on the door of the church to stop her ex from entering. The ex is going to try and blab so she must trust these men. If the ex does not go away when asked by the men they can then call the police and complain that he is a) causing a public nuisance and b) acting in a threatening manner towards the bride and that you fear her departure from the church because of him. They may then be able to come and remove him for you.
2006-07-26 22:06:59 · answer #2 · answered by geegee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the groom doesn't know his bride has a child, there's something going on here. Tell him first, then tell her. You may not be invited, but you have this information and instead of letting the father of the child ruin lives by jumping up at the wedding, let them know before hand that you know what's going to happen. Don't send the "Boys" around to him. That'll give him too much importance and he'll have grounds to have them arrested. Can we say "Drama"?
2006-07-26 06:47:45 · answer #3 · answered by Lizzie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is going to cause a lot of trouble with the couple when (if) they are married as the secret of the child is bound to come up eventually and then the husband will feel betrayed and will lose all respect for his wife. Why has she kept the child a secret from her fiancee in this day and age? If you are not invited to the wedding and are not a close friend then I would just leave things as they are. If you were close to the bride then you would have obviously been invited to the wedding. In that case I would say something to one of the bride's close relatives and leave it up to them to sort it out.
2006-07-27 00:37:15 · answer #4 · answered by jaygirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Would it be better to have the big wedding and THEN tell the groom?
There would be more money wasted and lives ruined more so by leaving it till AFTER the marriage.
You cannot start a marriage off with a lie.
If it splits them up then unfortunatly that's it but it will be FAR worse if left till later.
Seriously tell the bride to be to let the groom know NOW.
2006-07-26 06:47:41 · answer #5 · answered by Baz94 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would talk to the bride n tell her what you've found out, it willl give her the chance to tell her new hubby to be. Every one has there own reasons why they keep secrets, i have a few but i think something as important as this matter needs to be discussed like adults, maybe she could contact the father n sort something out with him, if her fiance loves her the way he should love her it won't matter what has happened in the past, her past is her own bussiness, but the child might get in touch with her when its old enough n the new hubby might not be able to handle it then. It's better to start a new with no secrets. Plus the bride might be able to start an have a relationship with the child. I don't know the circumstances but if she is honest things might turn out better for her.
2006-07-26 15:56:10 · answer #6 · answered by JOANNE S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forget the wedding...obviously someone needs to tell the groom that the bride has a child and before the wedding. That is something that will effect both of them for the rest of their lives, and he needs to know. It is wrong to keep something like that from him, and depending on how he reacts, yes it could definitely ruin the marriage.
2006-07-26 06:46:49 · answer #7 · answered by Consuming Fire 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell the bride before the wedding so there won't be any unnecessary unpleasantness that she has to deal with. Nothing worse than having your wedding ruined by some one being insensitive! make sure you tell her that you found out through a slip of the tongue so you don't look like the culprit! These things can be very tricky!
2006-07-26 06:47:50 · answer #8 · answered by December Princess 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It may or may not stop the marriage. I think whether or not you should do something, depends on your intention. Also, how do you know the bride? If you are trying to spare everyone some trouble, which it sounds like you are, you might say something to her. I agree with other people that it's none of your business but at the same time, I can't think of anyone in her situation who would prefer to be surprised with it at her wedding.
I wonder what this girl is thinking, what kind of sham marriage she thinks she can have with her husband not knowing she has a kid!! I know this sounds mean but I almost think she deserves to have a big deal made of things, just for being so deceitful!
2006-07-26 07:32:25 · answer #9 · answered by ykokorocks 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you kidding me!!!! YOU AREN'T INVITED. You are obviously not as close to the bride or groom as you thought you were.
Secondly, Some dude is getting hitched to some chick and he DOESN"T KNOW THAT SHE'S A MOMMY?????? And you want to spoil the fun by warning someone? PUH-LEEEZE!!!!! The only thing you need to be concerned with is how you're going to crash the wedding so you can see the show!!!
Oh, and for the love of God!!! try to get this on camera!!!!
2006-07-26 06:50:16 · answer #10 · answered by Manny 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I were you, I'd warn the bride. You can hire people to act as security at the door of your wedding. It's not too expensive, I don't think. I certainly had a plan in case my dad showed up at my wedding. I think you should tell the bride.
2006-07-26 06:44:53 · answer #11 · answered by Flutter 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋