I feel bad saying this because i love her so much but its getting hard to lie to her AND to myself; its like im in denial about her physical appearance, i tell my myself she's beautidul but shes just not beautiful...actually shes FAR from beautiful. what can I do?
i always thought my kids would be beautiful because im pretty and my husband is pretty good looking. my older daughter whom is 15 is gorgeous and i tell her all the time. i even tell my younger daughter who is 13 that shes beautiful but its a lie and its been getting harder and harder for me to lie.
my mother says i obsess too much about how they look and how they dress. she says im too obsessed with my own physical appearance also. that's true because i'm only 31 and am too young to stray away from caring about what i look like so i dont know what to do or what to think. and don't be rude. I feel really bad calling a 13 year old ugly but it's the truth, and i DO love her so much....
2006-07-26 05:14:51 · 73 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
no, she's not overweight. no, she doesn't have acne (with the exception of a few pimples like all teenagers). she has dark strawberry blonde hair, kind of like an auburn color. she has blue eyes and just a few freckles. There isn't a particular feature which makes her ugly, it's just all of her features put together. i think it could also be this "punk" stage or as she likes to call it "emo/scene" stage shes going through..
2006-07-26 05:41:20 · update #1
I know you don't mean "ugly" in a mean way. I'm not going to judge you like everybody else who answered did. I'm not in your shoes so i don't have that privilage. It seems like you do love your daughter and maybe it's getting hard to lie because you love her and wish you could tell her the truth.
i'm sure she's not ugly, why don't you give her a makeover?
NOT a big makeover, and NO plastic surgery. Since she is 13, she is probably already wearing makeup and is probably already in touch with her teenager, feminine side. Why don't you just make a few suggestions? (in a nice manner!)
Take her to the salon, get her hair cut, get her eye brows done, teach her how to use makeup properly. Bond with her.
Good luck. And remember: All children are beautiful.
2006-07-26 14:44:06 · answer #1 · answered by Stella 4 · 30⤊ 4⤋
My Daughter Is Ugly
2016-11-10 22:26:53 · answer #2 · answered by guberman 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I won't judge you. I know how it's hard to be honest sometimes, I have an ugly friend and she's always telling me I'm pretty, and I want to say she is too but it's really hard because I'm a super honest person and she's just really ugly!!! But like your daughter, she's super sweet and an awesome friend. So I suggest you let her wear makeup, if it helps. Show her the proper way to put it on, and I think it will make her look better. Also cute clothes might help?? Just an idea, because my ugly friend has the WORST style, and it makes her uglier.
2014-08-09 17:51:05 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 5⤋
There comes a time when we all need to realize that we have flaws. Personality flaws and physical flaws.It sounds to me that you are a perfectionist in your personality but the good Lord has a way of humbling us to the point were we need to change some of our ways. There is nothing wrong with you desiring your daughter to look nice but there is a problem when it's the only thing that controls your mind and can't look at the good in your daughter. I was an ugly child but when nature took it course, I view myself as a decent looking person. Sad to say but people are cruel and they do compare siblings with each other. Take it from me, allow this circumstance to change your perfectionist ways and learn to love your daughter for who she is. She will need your support through out the years and if she doesn't find it in you , she will go to someone else as a mother example. Trust me- I know what I am talking about.
2006-07-26 05:32:37 · answer #4 · answered by Agent E 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would never say that or even think this of my child. Your standards as a mother really needs to be evaluated. Take the time to do this because your perspective is out of whack. Love for your child should be unconditional. I bet your child would never call you ugly and would fight any other person who dared to call you that! Straighten up and tell your daughter that she is beautiful everyday. Even though you haven't told her shes ugly she knows exactly how you feel more than anybody else in this world. Shame on you! Oh, I think your mother was very right about you!
Best wishes!
2006-07-26 05:26:30 · answer #5 · answered by christy 3 · 3⤊ 4⤋
I wouldn't really worry too much since she is only 13. People go through alot of changes around that age. I've found that girls I wouldn't have looked twice at before actually become full fledged Godesses.
By the way you are never too young to go beyond looks and at 31 you have no excuse. Don't lie to her either. You love your daughter right? Well then you shouldn't have a problem complementing her on something you do admire her for even if it's not her appearances. You don't have to tell your child they're beautiful just tell them that you love them, besides that's all anybody needs.
2006-07-26 05:26:36 · answer #6 · answered by Dr.C 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It is only one person's opinion. There are probably other people out there who believes she is beautiful. I've seen two beautiful people who have ugly children! Since you and your husband are good looking, you've probably used your looks to get by a few times. Maybe this child will have to go down a different path and use her brain! She'll go through life fine! You don't need to tell her she's ugly! That will make her life harder later because she will grow up having low self esteem and she will probably accept that an ugly person is who she is. Give her a chance to work with her looks as she grows up. I've seen ugly children grow up actually looking good because they have good self esteem and as they grew up they used that confidence and use ways and it brings out some beauty in them. Some people have ugly faces with a good body. It levels it out! You aren't ugly to people that way. You are in between. You are not lying to her when you say she is beautiful because she is beautiful inside. Remember looks are not always everything! I mean look at Kirsten Dunst. She's not naturally pretty but people believe she is. Did you see her as a child? I still don't think she looks pretty to this day but some people do!
2006-07-26 05:29:06 · answer #7 · answered by ABNAM 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
OMG. Let's hope she never knows how you truly feel about her. I have never met a parent that thought their child was ugly. Yet, you say you love her. I don't understand that.
Your child is going through an awkward phase. We all had one. My 13 year old looks at pictures of herself from 2 years ago, and wants to throw them all away! It passes.
You sound very conceited and hung up on looks. It also appears that you never left teen behaviors behind. You talk as if you're stuck at age 16 (when you had your oldest daughter).
I don't think your child needs anything but your love. You on the other hand, should seek counseling.
2006-07-26 05:35:00 · answer #8 · answered by long_ebony_locs 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
It really shouldn't matter what she looks like on the inside. Try to focus on some good things about her personality. You shouldn't think your daughter is ugly. It's just not good for her. I am sure she is she has some nice features. You, as her mother should not focus on her outer beauty as much as you seem to. Encourage activities such as school, sports, or some other extracurricular activities. Also, try not to focus so much on your other daughter's beauty or your own. Don't make such a big deal out of it. She is a beautiful person and as her mother you should tell her that.
2006-07-26 07:52:10 · answer #9 · answered by ♥Fancy♥ 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Thank GOD your not my mother.I feel sorry for you daughters for having such a horrible mother like you.Your suppose to love your children no matter what.Be happy that she healthy.Beauty is only skin deep and if your saying that she's ugly she must have gotten it from you.I hope you daughter never fills the pain of your stupidity of her physical appearance.Maybe if you weren't so full of yourself you'll begin to notice the other beautiful things that you lovely daughter has to offer.Just remember what goes around comes around.I hope your daughter doesn't grow up to be a vain and dumb as her mother!
2006-07-26 05:50:32 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋