Still clubbing every weekend at 31. ls that a bit odd?

Question

My ex was 31, l'm 19, we went out for nearly a year and other then the night we met, which was in a night club, he never let me go clubbing with him as he said he can't let me come out on a boys night, not that l really wanted to go, just would have been nice to be asked.
He said l also couldn't go cos l couldn't ever stay the night with him, and he would really want me at the end of the night that's why he never asked me to go.
l used to think it would be nice for my mates to meet his, like what alot of my mates do when they have fellas, but he just didn't want to know.
Why is this?

l'm from london (uk)
Drinking and clubbing age here is 18

Answer 1

I think that you are his little toy and he only wants to play with you at his conveniance. You should find someone that isn't such a player unless you like being used

Answer 2

First of all (in response to one of your answers) your ex was not really old enough to be your father - he was only 12 years older than you (look at Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta Jones - now that is old enough!!). Secondly, you can get some guys who are 23 going on 35 and vice versa, so some older guys still like going clubbing. I'm not surprised he didn't want his girlfriend to go on a boys night out...imagine what a wuss his mates would have thought he was, god forbid lol! However, I think it's odd he never wanted his friends to meet yours - this can only mean one thing - that he wasn't really that into you. Sounds harsh but it's true. When a guy is seriously in love he wants to get involved in every aspect of your life and share every aspect of his - meeting each others friends would have been a natural progression. I suggest you don't fret anymore about him and go out there and find someone who deserves you! You're worth so much more...

Answer 3

He is using you and doesn't really care about you. At 31 to still have weekly guys night at the club is not a good sign. Him not wanting you to go with him is another bad sign. What do you think he's doing at the club that you cant see ? Dont fall for the "its guys night out" bs. They are all in the club meeting girls, not spending guy time together. You need to drop this looser yesterday. And not for nothing but a 31 yr old man dating a 19 yr old girl already shows you he's not right in the head. Run girl, run.

Answer 4

He's trifling! He also needs to grow up and get out of the barfly life style. You're at a disadvantage baby-girl because he has life experience that you don't have or want, trust me! If this is the behavior now it will only get worse unless little-man has a wake up call. He also has a drinking problem, count on it! You are not loosing anything by ditching that loser. Find some one closer to your age that isn't a drunk or hay-bag. Older men are the best but they have more experience and this makes the playing field uneven right from the start. Unless you find an exceptional man you risk being manipulated until you get up to speed, which happens quickly if someone is yanking your chain. You are not only getting your chain yanked your getting thrown off the pier, to the sharks!

Answer 5

First of all, he's too old for you, because with a ten year difference he has a lot of history and you don't and he has different memories of things where you were still in grade school. Also, when a person you are seeing regularly has a "boy's night" and would "want you at the end of the night" that's his way of saying that he is not tied down, even if you are. If he would want to at the end of "boy's" night and he meets someone else, and you aren't there, he would go for it. It sounds like to you he was your boyfriend, but to him you were just friends with privileges. If he's still clubbing every weekend, he isn't there for the music, he's there to hook up.

Answer 6

Have you ever heard the saying," Never bring sand to the beach?'' I had a boyfriend like this without the age difference. Basically, why do guys go to the club what is their purpose? Normally to meet girls and hang out with there friends that are also meeting girls. You are kidding yourself if you think that he goes to enjoy the music. I'm sure he likes you but he also is very much enjoying the single life. Don't waste your youth on this guy you could be doing something else.

Answer 7

Sounds like he was having too much fun without you if you know what I mean..... what do you mean he never let you go clubbing????? You are a grown up you can do as you please.

I'm 33 and will reluctantly go into a club... but I do prefer a nice bar with seats down on and music that plays in a volume that I can hear the conversation of the people I'm with..... lol... I am getting old!!!!!

Answer 8

What kind of club lets in a 19 year old? Ar ethe laws different in England? Anyway, sounds like he's got some game on the side and doesn't want you messing it up for him. I would have a sit-down with your guy...sounds like he's still playing games well after the party should've ended for him!

Answer 9

He was probably cheating on you. Besides you were 19 and you can't get into over 21 clubs.....unless you are from canada where the legal limit is 19. He's way too old for you anyways

Answer 10

Pleased for you he is the ex! Not because of the night club ban or the age difference because those replies are a bit of a nonsense. Rather, because he was controlling and dishonest.

Answer 11

If he's keeping a part of his life secret from you, it's because he DOESN'T WANT YOU TO KNOW ABOUT IT. He's picking up other girls (or boys), just like he picked you up. And yes, he's definitely becoming the "skeezy old guy" at the club ... You can do better.