My Boyfriend of 2 years has always been an attractive man to me. Lately he has started to let himself go. The once nice dresser has started wearing old jeans and holey teeshirts and now he refuses to get his hair cut which is really looking terrible, although I love him, I am finding myself less and less attracted to him. It's hard for me to confront him with this because of previous "jokes" about me being vain in my own personal appearance. I have told him several times, that i am a represntation of him, thats why I care so much about how i look when he goes out. Now if he is taking on that same concept..I dont think he represent me fairly and now we are growing further apart in the romance area.
2006-07-26 02:13:53 · 13 answers · asked by thinkaboutit 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It's quite possible that the declination of your boyfriend's appearance is a reflection of some deeper emotional issue. When people become depressed it's occasionally expressed through their appearance or physical environment. Perhaps gently discussing your observations and asking what's wrong will provide you with the true reason behind this sudden change in dress 'style'.
It's normal to feel a bit unconfortable. Love is both physically and emotionally driven and if his interest in his appearance is not as it was when you first met him, feelings of mild dissatisfaction aren't unexpected. Try talking to him and expressing your concerns. Hopefully, having a serious conversation about the effects it is having on you (and the relationship) will push him to take the steps necessary for change :).
2006-07-27 05:46:49 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
When the two of you are at home just sitting around....tell him you need to have a serious talk with him. Then tell him how you feel about the effect his appearance is having on the relationship. Let him know you still love him but things have changed. Don't attack him but point out a few things like his hair and the holey t-shirts. Then give it some time. If he doesn't make an effort and it's really bothering you then you may have to make a move to leave.
2006-07-26 02:22:05 · answer #2 · answered by daljack -a girl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know it's frustrating and I think you should loosen up a bit and I'm not saying flunk school. But consider going out, flirting, stepping out of you comfort-zone etc. Dress as normal as possible (I'm not saying dress like a hooker), don't wear make up (maybe just a little bit when you go out). I personally think you're deceiving everyone and that you will let down your guy when you take it off (I don't wear makeup and got a wonderful boyfriend). Maybe you should try fooling around, guys don't like uptight girls. Don't be pushy, ask short questions (it sounded like you clinged to that friend and wanted ANSWERS!!)... All of these could be the issues you're having, but do you consider your face pretty? So go out (party or something like that), talk to someone, if you like him ask him out. But when you go out with someone, ease them in on who you are. So basically, be who you are, but don't scare him off with your ''cute little quirks'', because they don't seem so little if you reveal them all on the first date. We all fake a perfect picture on the first date (it's like an interview for a relationship) but over time we get comfortable around each other and that's the best part (no, you can't have that from the start)... Some additional advice (personally I think this one is most important for you to know): Don't expect too much, like you meet a guy and think ''THIS IS THE ONE!''.... No, don't do that. You don't have to meet the right guy on your ''first try''. Things will happen when you least expect them, really... I wished to meet someone I could date (I'm pretty picky) and I almost gave up and then my friend dragged me to a party where I met my guy :) Hope this helps...
2016-03-26 22:48:03 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The reason why some men don't wear sexy clothes or smell good anymore is because they are not in the dating scene anymore. What I mean is when looking for an attractive young lady, you want to present yourself by wearing attractive clothing and cologne to attract the opposite sex. When men have the woman that they want, they tend to get sloppy and feel that their is no need to impress anybody anymore. I think you should let him know in a nice way, that he is looking sloppy and say that you like the sexy look and that it turns you on when he looks sexy.
Believe me if you talk him in a sexy way he will change. If not then write me, there is other strategies.
2006-07-26 02:24:45 · answer #4 · answered by robert s 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you love him looks do not matter. Yes it is a good thing to look good especially when you are out in public but you shouldent let this get in the way of your relationship. Look at him for what he is inside. Look at how he treats you. Look at how he makes you feel. If you are growing apart and you start to lose the feelings it is best not to be in the relationship anymore. Anyones signifigant other does not represent them. You represent yourself. As does he. Be confident in yourself and if you feel that he is humiliating himself let him. Everyone has their own look. His is just a little more rough cut than most.
2006-07-26 02:21:26 · answer #5 · answered by Adriana L 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You should be honest with him. Attraction is a big part of a relationship. I am sure you would want him to be honest with you just say you've noticed a big change and your not finding him attractive anymore
2006-07-26 02:16:39 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is a matter of decency and indecency, and how indecency brings down morality. It is a matter of image.
Sloppy people are sloppy, at least that is the image they portrait.
Bad image does not sell and bad image brings down morality.
2006-07-26 03:31:13 · answer #7 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Turn yourself into a slob to and if he say's anything , just tell him if he is happy being a slob and you except it then he better except you for the same thing..
2006-07-26 02:18:03 · answer #8 · answered by Jojo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you talked to him about it? There is no reason for him to look like a slob when he is with you.
2006-07-26 02:17:22 · answer #9 · answered by bad_bob_69 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
leave if he wont clean up his act so to speak, have you asked him why he just let him self go?
2006-07-26 02:18:00 · answer #10 · answered by 'Cause I'm Blonde 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋