My boyfriend was Murdered on Sept.17,05, he was 27.We were very much in love. He was all I had. Sometimes when I sit back and recall all the good times, I see myself, I see him, but I can't see his face. I see his dread-locks, and all other charecterristics about him (skin tone, head shape) but i can't see facial features. No matter what I try, i turn off the tv, radio whatever and free myself form distraction, but i still can't concetrate enuff 2 see his face. I even look at pictures, turn away and I can no longer see his face on the picture i would have just looked at! Regarding, conversations we had, I remebr those to every detail, but I just can't visualize his face.I once read online that this is a mental condition, one in which u cant rember people faces.
I need hlp! I'm so confused I don't even know what my question is exactly, just offer any advice to why I might be forgeting his face and any memory techniques you have. Thanks in Advance
2006-07-25 22:26:51 · 5 answers · asked by Gifted and Gracious 3 in Health ➔ Mental Health
My dear don't be confused. We as humans have various ways to cope with pain. Some of us cry, some of us, hug a t-shirt, some of us stare at a picture.
Since you mentioned that he was all you had, it must have been very hard for you and am sure it still is very hard for you to cope with hs loss. However, I am sure he would have wanted you to move on and not suffer. I truely believe that the reason you cannot see his face anymore is a coping mechanism. You see the dreadlocks, the skin color, all that give a jest of who he was, may be you are unable to recall his face because the last time you saw his face it was tramatic, probably his funeral I am guessing. Your brain is helping you in the moving on process.
Next time you want to recall his face look at a picture there is nothing wrong with doing so.
2006-07-25 22:36:10 · answer #1 · answered by Stevo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes your mind blocks out things which were traumatic for you. It is a natural response. It isn't that you are forgetting him. He is still there. It is that your mind has locked it up for now.
I'm real sorry for your loss. I myself have lost a significant other and a daughter back in 1996. I went through the same thing as you are now. I hated myself because I couldn't remember them, but it eventually came back to me when I finally came to terms with losing them.
As long as you never stop loving him he will always be there in your heart and mind.
2006-07-26 05:38:27 · answer #2 · answered by ancient_wolf_13 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The same thing happens to me when I try to remember my father's face. He died when I was 11, and now I'm 24. Even back then I could not see his face when I thought of him. I can see his figure and shape as if he was standing in front of me, but his face is blank. I'm pretty sure it is a spiritual thing. I think it means that because a person's face is essentially the thing we notice and pay attention to when they are alive, when they die it's almost as if it is their soul. It's hard to explain, but the eyes are really the key to a person's soul, and when they die all that is left is their soul, no more body. So because they are physically not in front of us, their soul is essentially invisible. But they are always with us.
2006-07-26 06:43:14 · answer #3 · answered by Anita 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's all a part of the healing / mourning process. He would want you to move forward & have a good life, you'll never completely forget him, but you're slowing yourself down by worrying about it. Celebrate his life & your time together. You'll see each other again when it's time.
2006-07-26 05:45:53 · answer #4 · answered by Maui No Ka Oi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't worry about it. You are merely blocking out painful memories. You will see him clearly in your dreams.
2006-07-26 05:31:12 · answer #5 · answered by Not Tellin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋