TEACHER: Why are you late?
WEBSTER: Because of the sign.
TEACHER: What sign?
WEBSTER: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
_____________
TEACHER: Cindy, why ar e you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
CINDY: You told me to do it without using tables!
_____________
TEACHER: John, how do you spell "crocodile?"
JOHN: K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
JOHN: Maybe it's wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!
_____________
TEACHER: What is the chemical formula for water?
SARAH: H I J K L M N O!!
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
SARAH: Yesterday you said it's H to O!
______________
TEACHER: George, go to the map and find North America.
GEORGE: Here it is!
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS: George!
______________
TEACHER: Willie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WILLIE: Me!
______________
TEACHER: Tommy, why do you always get so dirty?
TOMMY: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
______________
TEACHER: Ellen, give me a sentence starting with "I."
ELLEN: I is...
TEACHER: No, Ellen..... Always say, "I am."
ELLEN: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
_____________
TEACHER: "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
JOHNNY: "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."
_____________
TEACHER: "George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted doingit. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him?"
JOHNNY: "Because George still had the axe in his hand."
______________
TEACHER: Now, Sam, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SAM: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
_______________
TEACHER: Desmond, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
DESMOND: No, teacher, it's the same dog!
______________
TEACHER: What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
PUPIL: A teacher.
2006-07-25 21:58:54 · 19 answers · asked by ? 2 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
LAST ONE TONIGHT... PAST MY LIMIT!!!
2006-07-25 22:00:17 · update #1
People are mean!!! I think that you brightined everyones life with these cleaver jokes even if you didnt invent them! Thank you for the laugh!
2006-07-25 22:26:13 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
LMAO bout this 1:
TEACHER: "George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted doingit. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him?"
JOHNNY: "Because George still had the axe in his hand."
and this 1:
TEACHER: Now, Sam, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SAM: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
2006-07-25 22:41:57 · answer #2 · answered by ♥ask me♥ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"I is..." is not a sentence. Your post was not a question, and this IS an ANSWER. And you ARE a moron!
bobby_ovulva and jamestheloser really made my day though!
I mean, even chimpanzees can go to the web and cut n paste jokes and repost. How disgusting you are, Cimette!
Gawd, I feel like I should take a shower now or something!
2006-07-25 22:03:58 · answer #3 · answered by al_dickey 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Lovely jokes including the others you posted, they were great. Pity u've passed your limit.
2006-07-25 22:04:21 · answer #4 · answered by alloy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel like I should answer SOMETHING...I guess it's pavlovian response...ummm...
...5 dollars...same as in town
funny stuff, snapperhead.
2006-07-25 22:08:36 · answer #5 · answered by ersatz666 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow, you ve got a long ques, but I like the very first one
2006-07-25 22:01:33 · answer #6 · answered by LB James 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
haha! thats heaps good! "he still had the axe in his hand"! Classic!
2006-07-25 22:20:36 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow,
I so want to viciously beat you, and yet hold you close and comfort you at the same time....
why?
2006-07-25 22:02:44 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't kids say the darnest thing...
good jokes
2006-07-26 01:01:46 · answer #9 · answered by tb 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol oh jr. high how i do miss it lol check ya later ♥
2006-07-26 02:43:47 · answer #10 · answered by ♥ The One You Love To Hate♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋