Is there a painless break-up?

Question

Ok, Ive been wit my BF for a year and have known him for like 3 or 4. But just resently we've been having issues wit our realtionship. We're both 22 n i think at this point in our lives we need to start plannin wat we want out of life, not so much together but for ourselves. I want alot out of life, i have very high expectations for my future thats how i was raised but he on the other hand wants nothing out of life. He is content wit having a medi-oker life wit a medi-oker job. Im not, so now in the last few days i met a man that opend my eyes to wat kind of man i want to be wit. He's got his life on track n knows wat he wants. BUt i love my BF, ive never once cheated on him n never would, i want so bad to give my BF a chance to show himself, i cant see myself w/o but i dont see a future w/ him. Im just so unsure wat to do..Theres the other guy. So should i leave my BF or stay. Plz dont be mean, im just wondering wat would be rite not how i might be wrong.i feel bad enough as it is.

Answer 1

Usually there is no painless break-up. Usually the person who breaks it off doesn't feel bad right away but will begin to feel hurt at a later date, once the other person has already suffered. If you really think about your life, you will know that the man you are currently with is not the guy for you. If you dream big and he dreams small your future will be sacrificed. Did the new guy show an interest in you? If so, you will know that you will be able to have a better and more fulfilling relationship with someone who has a mindset more like your own. From the way you wrote your question, I believe someone who also has high goals and who wants to experience everything you want to experience would be a better suited match for yourself.

Answer 2

in your situation it's going to be painful no matter what. you are not only going to feel the pain of breaking up, but the cause of it isn't going to be the absence of your boyfriend, it's going to be the guilt that somebody else is more appealing to you, and even though it's not the guy you see yourself with in the future, it's a guy like him, a guy that your boyfriend never aspires to be. that's okay...there has to be people who are satisfied with a meciocre life in this world too...and mediocracy to one person maybe the cream of the crop to another. you are so young, thank goodness you are realizing all of this now rather than years down the road when you are saddled into a marriage and have a family. i think that you and your boyfriend will recover from the break up in short order...a year isn't really anything to write home about, time flies, the older you get the more apparent that becomes...and soon a year will seem like almost nothing.

Answer 3

I'm a guy, and chances are you won't have to see any of his pain. He'll probably just walk away, and you'll feel terrible. The best thing to do is convince YOURSELF that you're doing the right thing for both of you. If you can't do that, maybe you should spend some more time thinking about your decision before you do anything rash.

Answer 4

I think that you need to look deep inside and find out what will truly make you happy. Talk to him and tell him how you feel and let him know that what he's doing with his life right now, isn't fitting into your future.

Answer 5

first of all answer this question...would i rather be poor but happy or rich but miserable??? trust me it applys! second... while its great that you want to improve your life and work hard for your future, 22 is still young. don't stress to much, give yourself the space and the time to think about things without harsh goals or limits......nobody on line can answer this, your the one who knows what you want!

Answer 6

If they were horrible to you it is very close to painless.