what do i do to help a friend that cuts?

Question

ok well my friend cuts and i just found out and she said shes been cutting for almost 3 years and i want to help her because shes really depressed and idont want her to cut to deep because she my best friend and i would be so devistated if she killed herself she also talks about suicide all the time what can ido to help her?


hy sister also cuts and this is her email address so yea but i dontwant to ask her about it because she will probally think im cutting so can anyone help me out?

Answer 1

Maybe contact this place -
http://www.selfinjury.org/indexnet.html

Psychology
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Attempts to understand self-harm fall broadly into either attempts to interpret motives, or application of psychological models.

Motives for self-harm are often personal, often do not fit into medicalised models of behaviour and may seem incomprehensible to others, as demonstrated by this quote:

"My motivations for self-harming were diverse, but included examining the interior of my arms for hydraulic lines. This may sound strange." [18]

Assessement of motives in a medical setting is usually based on precursors to the incident, circumstances and information from the patient [5] however the limited studies comparing professional and personal assessments show that these differ with professionals suggesting more manipulative or punitive motives. [19]

The UK ONS study reported only two motives: “to draw attention” and “because of anger”.[1]

Many people who self-harm state that self-injury is a way to "go away" or dissociate, separating the mind from feelings that are causing anguish. This may be achieved by tricking the mind into believing the pain felt at the time is caused by self-injury instead of the issues they were facing before: the physical pain therefore acts as a distraction from emotional pain.[4] The sexual organs may be deliberately hurt as a way to deal with unwanted feelings of sexuality. [citation needed]

To complement this theory, one can consider the need to 'stop' feeling emotional pain and mental agitation. "A person may be hyper-sensitive and overwhelmed; a great many thoughts may be revolving within their mind, and they may either become triggered or could make a decision to stop the overwhelming feelings." [20]

Alternatively self-injury may be a means of feeling something, even if the sensation is unpleasant and painful. Those who self-injure sometimes describe feelings of emptiness or numbness, and physical pain may be a relief from these feelings. "A person may be detached from himself or herself, detached from life, numb and unfeeling. They may then recognise the need to function more, or have a desire to feel real again, and a decision is made to create sensation and ‘wake up’." [20] A flow diagram of these two theories accompanies this section.

It is also important to note that some self-injurers report feeling very little to no pain while self-harming. [16]

Those who engage in self-harm face the contradictory reality of harming themselves whilst at the same time obtaining relief from this act. For some self-injurers this relief is primarily psychological whilst for others this feeling of relief comes from the beta endorphins released in the brain (the same chemicals responsible for the "runner's high"). These act to reduce tension and emotional distress and may lead to a feeling of calm. A similar rush of endorphins is triggered when someone receives a tattoo. In this way, one can become psychologically addicted to getting tattoos. Similarly, those who self injure may also become psychologically addicted to the endorphin rush. [citation needed]

As a coping mechanism, self-injury can become psychologically addictive because, to the self-injurer, it works; it enables him/her to deal with intense stress in the current moment. The patterns sometimes created by it, such as specific time intervals between acts of self-injury, can also create a behavioral pattern that can result in a wanting or craving to fulfill thoughts of self-injury.

Answer 2

First of all, stay very calm. Stay cool & be calm.Try doing something good for both of you. A day out . . . just have fun! Try learning how to meditate and maybe something like yoga and swimming to stay relaxed

I have a list that I give out that has helped. Contact me & I'll give you a copy. Many SIs that I've worked with said I was the first person to tell them what to do before they SI. instead of waiting until they get in the hospital.

For her There are several different flat-out-crisis-in-the-moment strategies typically suggested. My favorite is doing anything that isn't SI and produces intense sensation: squeezing ice, taking a cold bath or hot or cold shower, biting into something strongly flavored (hot peppers, ginger root, unpeeled lemon/lime/grapefruit), rubbing Ben-Gay® or Icy-Hot® or Vap-O-Rub® under your nose, etc. Matching reactions and feelings is extremely useful.

You and your friend will get through it is long as you can remain calm whatever she says, just stay calm. By all means go to counseling & support groups. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Tell her there is a better way. I found it I have some things she can do to help her depression also.

Answer 3

hi there, cutting has been said to be 1 starting signs of a psychological disorder. In most cases these people see them self as inverior to other people or that they hav done something wrong either to someone or ingeneral, and has to be punished for doing it!
i think the 1st thing you have to do it to talk to her and find out from her why she is cutting herself and what does she think about it, and how does she feel afterwards!

If you can find this out you will be able tos tart understanding why she does it or whtat causes it, once this is determinded you and her family can start to work and the factors that play a role in causing her to cut herself!!! family plays a big role in solving this problem probably just as much as a best friends opinion! so i suggest u put her down and be straight foward wiht her and find out why!! and talk to her about this... express your concerns etc!

i hope this info comes in handy, if you require more help on this dont hesistate to email me at [e-mail].

what i have just told you i know works because i had a friend that did it aswell and all this help her in stopping.

Regards

Reinard

Answer 4

As close and sacred as friendship is, it is times like these when a friend needs to let an adult in on what is going on. Find somebody you can talk to that can take action and help. If your friend is already cutting and is also talking of suicide it is serious business. Be a true friend and tell an adult so she can get the help she needs and deserves. She might have an imbalance that can be helped with medication or she may need to vent and talk with somebody to figure things out in her life. We all need to do that sometimes.
Be a friend and tell. Good Luck to you and your friend and her sister. :)

Answer 5

Every one that cuts themselves does because they are afraid the pain in side hurts worse then what they are doing to themselves.
You need to get this girl help.
If you can not i suggest you get her to be open with you, talking about your feelings is the best thing you can do.
Tell her you are there for when she needs you tell her to call you when she feels like cutting her.
Tell talking to you is better then cutting herself.
She doesn't cut her self in public she does it alone.
Tell her talking to some one is way to cut your self with out a knife.
And if you can talk to her with only nice words of encouragement and thought. If you cant handle this i suggest you get help immediately because most people cant handle it, she cant.
But you can at least try!

Answer 6

My husband did that too, for a very long time when he was a kid. Then he began to think about doing it again just this year, 20 years on...get her a psych appointment, an emergency one NOW. And they can commit her and get her the help she needs. It is a cry for help..she will get the right help and then I hope she can function in life to do positive things for herself then..after being given the appropriate coping mechanisms they can teach her for when she feels this way. It does work..believe me.

Answer 7

counseling will help. usually, it is alos connected with an eating disorder. She may need for someone to help her stop. A close freind of mine told her school counselor and the counselor got the parents involved and it turned out ok. But deppression is serious and so is cutting. She needs help...not go it alone. even if she gets mad at you for telling, you will be helping her a lot.

Answer 8

this may seem like a juvenile response but tell her parents this is going on.
yea it seems like rating but there is a big diference between this and some petty juvenile hijinks
your friend realy needs help ,and the suport of her frinds
self harm is dificult to over come and ther are doctors (psycologyst/psychiatrist) that can help
your friend will ofcorse be upset that you said something but she will forgive you expecialy if you stick by her

Answer 9

If she's underage, tell her parents. If she's an adult, talk to her and convince her to get help ASAP. She needs to see her doctor, who can refer her to a counselor, or, if money is a concern, she can talk to someone at a local free clinic. This is very important and she needs help fast.

Answer 10

i had a friend that cut too....and the best thing to that i did was to be her friend......she was going through a really hard time and she told me later that one time when i came over to talk to her she was just about to cut her self again......you can not fix her problem but you can help it weaken.....just be there for her