I have been with my bf for about 6 years we met online and im crazy about him. He lives in my country and i live in US the problem is that i dont know what to do? he cheated on me about two years back but i just cant forgive him i tried so hard but i dont think i can live without him? He cheated on me for two years but he tells me he loves me and he does i can feel it and he cares for me too and now even more but i just cant trust him anymore? I dont know what to do im getting mixed feeling but i just dont know how to live without him? Any advise anyone please??
2006-07-25 16:53:46 · 14 answers · asked by ehlife 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Some say love, it is a river that drowns the tender reed.
Some say love, it is a razor that leaves your soul to bleed.
Some say love, it is a hunger, an endless aching need.
I say love, it is a flower, and you it's only seed.
It's the heart, afraid of breaking, that never learns to dance.
It's the dream, afraid of waking, that never takes a chance.
It's the one, who won't be taken, who cannot seem to give.
And the soul, afraid of dying, that never learns to live.
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. Love is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.
2006-07-25 16:54:53 · answer #1 · answered by Princess illusion 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, sweetie the mixed feelings are there because of the feelings he has for you. The thing is he cheated on you for two years and of course that puts a bad taste in your mouth.
The best thing you can do is to be careful. Follow your heart.
I had a similar incident. I am engaged to a man that lives in Peru
Something happened where his ex stepped in and caused the relationship to break up. I told him that's all she wanted. He didn't listen and chose to break up
three weeks later he came crawling back and told me that I am right he wanted to come back to me and I had mixed feelings.
I really thought long and hard about it and I decided that it felt right that he deserved a second chance.
I just basically followed my heart and I am glad I did. I still have to work on the trust issue, but I am coming around
I know exactly how you feel. I really really do.
Follow your heart.
Be aware of what your heart says as opposed to your emotions
2006-07-26 00:06:00 · answer #2 · answered by HappyCat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Really to tell u the truth u need to let him go yes i knwo how much u love him i love a guy like that but when i dont have that feeling of trusthing him then its over even though u think u can but ur feeling already telling u that its over b/c ur trust for him is gone already before u even know it. if u cant trust someone u love then that relationship is over unless u trust him again with all ur heart n knowin that u can and knowing that he wont cheat on u again then ur relationship would still work. 6 year is a long time and u would have a long time to get over it but i hope u know what i mean trust is one of those key to keep a relationship good and healthy. best of luck to u
2006-07-26 00:05:47 · answer #3 · answered by Kelly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sure you enjoyed the wedding liturgy above (wasn't that first part from Napolean Dynamite?), but I doubt it gave you any answers. If you are in two different countries, and he cheated on you for two years, I can see how hard it would be to trust him. It will be hard, but the best thing is to let him go. Without trust, there is no relationship, especially given the distance between you.
2006-07-25 23:59:04 · answer #4 · answered by julz 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Without trust, you can't have a good relationship, and once a trust has been lost, it is almost impossible to restore. A bit like Humpty Dumpty. No one could put him back together again.
You have to make up your mind, what is more important to you, his love now, as he tells you he does, or living with doubt every day.
If he's late for a date, or doesn't call you when he says he will, will your mind go on overtime, thinking of him being with someone else.
If you can't remove that thought from your mind, then for the sake of your own sanity, it's time to give him up, and find someone, good and true.
2006-07-25 23:59:18 · answer #5 · answered by johnb693 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When someone cheats they will always cheat. Doesn't matter if you still Love him. You must leave him no one should be forgiven for that. You will get past living without him move on. If you stay he knows that you will always give in every time he cheats on you.
2006-07-26 00:05:15 · answer #6 · answered by tm 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
about the cheating, if that happened 2 years ago, and still bothers you, then you guys need to talk. but you have to set an ultimatum - anything like this happens again, i will leave. and leave you will do when it ever happened again. if he loves you too and cherishes you, he will not cheat again.
if that 2 year old cheating really bothers you, then it would seem pointless to continue with the relationship. i think it would be as hard on him as it is on you...
2006-07-25 23:57:58 · answer #7 · answered by The Punisher 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is possible to love someone with all your heart but not trust them...But.....it is difficult to ever have a complete loving relationship without trust. It is a major part of every marriage.
Do you consider or see yourself married to this man?
Would you be able to let him go out with friends or away on a business trip without worrying about what he was doing or who he was seeing? Could you go out of town without wondering if another woman would be in your bed?
I was in a marriage like that for 8 years and believe me, it was horrible. He swore to me time after time that he loved me and NO ONE ELSE . He swore to me that he never cheated BUT...He ended up admitting after our divorce that he had many girlfriends during our marriage...
It hurts terribly to let go...It hurts to be without them...
but you need to move on, Hon. Cut the strings and find someone who loves you without lies and without cheating.
I did!!!
2006-07-26 00:05:45 · answer #8 · answered by ND M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey gurl i know how u feel but heres the deal u should forgive him but u wont be able to forgett what he did but he needs to gain ure trust back like it was its not ure fault and stuff so dont let one slip stop u from being wit someone u like okay
2006-07-25 23:57:26 · answer #9 · answered by Faviola M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
cut him loose and move on. If you try to get back with him you are just showing him that he can do what ever he wants and use you like a door mat. Move on.. time will heal and you will find someone that treats you like a woman should be treated.
2006-07-25 23:56:07 · answer #10 · answered by Jedday 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋