Gay and Interracial parents?

Question

I'm quite certain I won't ask this in a manner that won't offend someone. I failed diplomacy anyway and this is a pretty charged question but I'm sincerely curious...

How do you justify having children? I personally have no problem with gay or interracial relationships but children are brutal. You have to know that they are going to be absolutely terrorized growing up and in school unless you are in an area like Provincetown, Ma; Greenwich Village or San Francisco (and even then) these kids are going to be ostracized pitifully. They will adapt but like most psychological survival skills, they cause more problems when the danger is over then they ever save people from.

Is it just because you can? Are you telling yourself that you are trying to change and better the world for them? Anywho - would appreciate your thoughts... please though, no anecdotal evidence, I have my own.

I am continually left wondering if people actually read these questions or if comprehension is a difficulty. When I say that I have no problem with gay or interracial couples, I mean I HAVE NO PROBLEM WITH GAY OR INTERRACIAL COUPLES. With implies that I'm not Christian - which I am not. I have probably dated outside my race more than I have dated inside - I don't know for certain because I don't keep track - because it is a non-issue for me. Children however, are not a non-issue for me. Unfortunately, I do not have the study in front of me or I'd post it... lemme look.... here we go: take a peek rather than attack me for being right when it doesn't suit you.

http://www.youth-suicide.com/gay-bisexual/racism-gay-lesbian/index.htm

Answer 1

My husband is black and I am white. Our children have many friends in school. Nobody even pays any attention to the fact that they are half black! But when I was in school I was picked on all the time for not wearing the right clothes and for being shy. My point is kids will always find something to tease other kids about! As for their parents being gay I don't think they get picked on any more than other kids!

Answer 2

Sorry, I have to give anecdotal evidence, can't really find a way around it.

Mixed Children
Personally, I find it amazing that in America, this is a problem. Where are you guys??? I am mixed Indian Danish, born and grew up in Malaysia and live in Australia. In these four countries that I am linked to, there has been no problem with the fact that I am mixed. No racism, no nothing, if anything, I am told that I am lucky that I get the best of four worlds. An understanding of four different cultures. At school, I was never ostracised. Why should you be teased??? You are mixed, so what??? Around the world there are mixed kids all over the place. Obviously a whole lot more than in America.

Homosexual Parents
I could see your point in this, certainly, it is an issue close to my heart as in terms of my sexuality, I am neither here nor there, but one day I will have to choose. And if I do find that I prefer to be with the same sex then well, children are going to come into the picture. I would love to have kids. You are absolutely right, they are going to be teased and taunted but, at the same time, remember that the world is changing and this phenomenon is growing. Pretty soon, it is going to become a normal occurence.

Answer 3

Gay and interracial parents probably have kids for the same reasons everybody else does. Thinking ahead to how other kids wil tease and ostracize your child is pointless. I mean, how many kids, of any background, were never teased or ostracized? I came from two heterosexual, same-race parents, I was teased and ostracized throughout my childhood just like most children were. And I don't see that it would have been better that I was just never born than to be born and teased when I was a kid.
The cruel kids who treat their peers like this will find a reason to do it regardless. To go so far as to say that a child should not exist, rather than face this, is bascially saying that the bullies are right to do what they do. But even then, it goes farther than the bullies, because I don't think even those kids are saying, "You have no right to be alive."
Also, gays adopt a lot of kids, giving a child a family that it otherwise would not have had. Again, is being teased or ostracized so much worse than living in a foster home, or in some other environment where you have no real family? I don't think so.
You seem to put an awful lot of weight on children being teased. I hope that something terrible didn't happen to you growing up, that made you feel that never having a family, or even a life, would have made you better off.

Answer 4

wow. i have a strong feeling you're christian. i am sure that's rite because all Christians are unmoving conservatives who hate anything that at all a little different. So anyway, you think its worse for an interracial couple or a gay couple to raise a child then say, an abusive father and an alcoholic mother for instance?? you need to think things through. NO matter what, kids are going to be teased. The sexuality or race of the parents are not going to change that. Sorry, but you have your reasoning, and i have mne, and I think most SANE and RATIONAL people would realize that love for your partner and your children is in fact, truley blind. Blind to color and sexual preference and religious diffrence and everything.

Answer 5

How can you relate Gay and Interracial with the same type of questioning? There's nothing wrong or offending about two people of different cultures coming together? Maybe people are more likely to have a problem with those who are homosexual because of religious beliefs but I've never heard of any controversy with interracial couples. I don't see how you can even question that. If you ask me that really isn't as much of a controversial factor as same-sex relationships.

Answer 6

I would imagine that gay and interracial parents run the decision to have kids through the same matrix hetero and intraracial parents do. It all boils down to wanting someone to love. I'm sure that all parents (I know I have) have that moment where you say to yourself "was it right to bring a child into a world like this?" but that procreative urge is one of the strongest human beings have.

Answer 7

i almost let myself get really upset by your question. i am the parent of a bi-racial child. i don't have to justify having a child with a black man. yes children are cruel but it's because they are brought up by ignorant parents. kids will be mean just b/c they can and not necessarily b/c the child is bi-racial. ugly kids, poor kids, kids with some kind of handicap, etc. it doesn't matter. if a child is raised ignorant, they will be that way with everyone. i didn't marry a black man b/c i can or to try and change the world. i married him b/c he is the best man God ever made.

Answer 8

Sometimes people find themselves in situations they never planned on and unfortunately Children are ALWAYS caught in the middle or are ALWAYS affected by whatever the adults decisions turn out to be. But it doesn't mean that the adults go out of their way to date someone just to "ruin" their kids life. Alot of times they just can't help who they are attracted to and they just don't care what people think even if it may affect their kids lives at school and in the neighborhood.

Answer 9

I just happen to be an interracial child who lives in San Francisco and I had a great childhood the only ppl that picked on me picked on me because i looked better then them. I think you should step into the 21st century and get over it. u may as well just call your self a racist

Answer 10

If a child is loved,it won't matter.. all kids go through torment of some sort..I used to HATE when people would say my mom was hot....I would say."shut up, that's my MOM!"...It doesn't matter..kids will bust on other kids for anything they can.It's the nature of children..we just do what we can with our own and teach them not to be punks...I guess this is probably 'anecdotal evidence'..but,seriously..you MUST know how kids are, you WERE one once.