I have a major problem on my hands here.... I've had a boyfriend for 4 years, and I love him very much. The thing is I'm very attracted to a guy I've known for 5 years. But we live thousands of miles apart so nothing ever happened between us. Now I'm seeing him again in December for the first time in 5 years. I'm really afraid of what might happen when he's here. I know how horrible that sounds. And I've been fighting with myself over this for weeks now. But I still dont know what I'm going to do! I really want to see him again, he's an amazing friend, I just don't know if I can control myself around him.
2006-07-25 15:32:17 · 6 answers · asked by fallen_and_fading 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I agree with the first part of what "Miss Nikki" said. I think you know what you want so long as the other party cooperates. It sounds like your biggest reluctancy is from guilt towards your current boyfriend. Four years is a long time and I bet he's become just as comfortable with you as you have him and neither of you want to end this on a whim. It's going to be a very taxing decision but it sounds to me like you're only fishing for advice from whatever source to tell you to go with it. My best advice at this point is to assess your current relationship and where it's headed. If you don't like what you see then split up. As far as he--or even you are concerned it's only because you need some time alone to think about your life. When this guy comes to see you, treat him as a friend. Tread water carefully, so to speak. You just don't want to jump right into things. And maybe you should bring a friend with you the first time you see him. But putting yourself in that situation where you're not responsible to your current boyfriend would make things go a lot easier. Just feel it out and see where things take you.
And you just know you wanna give me 10 points, right.
2006-07-27 19:36:00 · answer #1 · answered by Luce's Darkness 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like you already know what you want, and it isn't the guy you are with. If you love him so much this wouldn't be an issue and you wouldn't even want to see the guy in December. Do you even know if the other guy is attracted to you??? Please think it through carefully and decide if you want to end a current relationship for a possible hook up. Best of luck to you.
2006-07-25 15:39:34 · answer #2 · answered by miss_nikki214 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was in a similar situation. Go for it!- you only live once! I thought i'd regret it too but I don't, and I realized afterwards that I would've kicked myself everyday for the rest of my life if I didn't. Hey if you love it and it works out, it was worth it. If you didn't love it and it doesn't work out, it was still worth it. Your life is yours so live it for yourself and don't look back! And don't even think about telling your boyfriend! ;) Good Luck!
2006-07-25 15:39:34 · answer #3 · answered by theWord 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that if you can't trust yourself then you should take someone with you to meet this guy. You also need to take a look at your relationship. If you are having thoughts of being unfaithful to your boyfriend, what is wrong in the relationship?
2006-07-25 15:37:19 · answer #4 · answered by ♥dream_angel♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dump your boyfriend first if you are going to do it because it's not his fault that you don't know what you want. You don't want to live a lie with him either. So either don't see that guy or dump your boyfriend and see him. Don't live two lives.
2006-07-25 15:47:21 · answer #5 · answered by Doodaa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just wait and see what happens. Good luck! <333
2006-07-25 15:39:25 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋