She gets her feeling hurt way to easy. I don't want to go through hearing her pout about it. I just want to go home and rest. I don't feel like eating dinner with her, and her family. I just don't want to seem like an a hole. How should I tell her?
2006-07-25 10:25:13 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Just dont show up and then when she calls tellher you were abducted by aliens
2006-07-25 10:31:56 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋
This is what I do, I accept every third invite to my husband's family. Doesn't matter from who, just every third one. Or whatever is comfortable with you. I tell them the truth, that I am tired because I work alot. While I am there, if things are getting to the point that I don't want to be there anymore, I leave. I always go on a night/afternoon when I have something different to do, so my time is limited to a little bit. Also when the pouting or fighting starts, I can say, "Oh my would you look at the time, I have get going for........." It works, then my daughter isn't cut from their family (and I can still visit with the ones that I do like).
Good Luck
2006-07-25 10:35:00 · answer #2 · answered by Someonesmommy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's a really hard situation to be in. I can totally relate to that, because when I get home from work, I just want to stay home and relax and do my own things, not become part of somebody else's agenda. That doesn't make me an ******, or you either.
Really, you need to just tell it like that. It's nothing personal, just that you are a person who enjoys having your own quiet time when you eat your dinner.
She has no right to make you feel forced, or certainly to pout about it. That's ridiculous. She should just invite somebody else.
2006-07-25 10:31:31 · answer #3 · answered by mia2kl2002 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The next casual conversation you have with her should touch on issues of stress and pressure. You should calmly and psuedo-casually vent about work, stress, lack of sleep, etc. Explain that you have been coveting some true alone time, and have yet to fulfill that due to other obligations. Now you have two options:
1) Tell her that you would love to eat dinner with her and her family, but you really need the time to yourself. And, you would be willing to re-schedule it to another time in your life. . . Where you were not so stressed and tired out.
2) Wait for her to suggest it. "That's sad, Susan. Why don't you just take some time to yourself tomorrow. We can reschedule the dinner, no need to be bothered. I wish I could help more."
2006-07-25 10:39:19 · answer #4 · answered by Lian 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes we have to do things we don't want to for the sake of family. Have you tired to get to know her?
Anyway, tell her that you'd love to but you've got too many things to do or that you're tired...it's the truth so you wouldn't be lying to her.
But I still think you should go over, maybe not all the time, but maybe once in a while. She's obviously trying to make an effort to get to know you.
Good luck
2006-07-25 10:35:31 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why do you have to listen to her? You are in your own house, she is in hers, and you don't have to answer the phone if you don't want to. She sounds somewhat manipulative to me.
Just tell her the truth, that you appreciate the offer, but you don't really feel like coming over. If she starts to argue, just tell her in a calm voice that you have to go now and hang up. it is her own fault for letting herself get upset over the fact that she cannot get her way. You have a right to set boundaries in the relationship, even if she resents it.
2006-07-25 10:50:29 · answer #6 · answered by Randy G 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell her the truth. You have worked a long day. You're tired. Would like some time to yourself. Eventually, you may come by. But at this time, you can't. Your busy with your own life and obligations..
2006-07-25 10:39:46 · answer #7 · answered by dotobjects 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell her that you are tired and need to go home to rest and ask for a rain check. I'm sure she'll understand.
2006-07-25 15:47:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you have a busy lifestyle, that's your answer.
You're too tired.........Your busy.........Have too much to do.....
The list is endless. However, only use ONE excuse atta time.
I've always heard the saying that MORE than one excuse is a sure sign of lying.
Dont take any chances of that ole saying being true! :)
2006-07-25 10:31:22 · answer #9 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if you care that much about her feelings ,you could just go and cut it short,have other plans ,or just be honest and tell her that you are not really wanting to be around a lot of people.... i dont know but maybe i helped.
2006-07-25 10:30:05 · answer #10 · answered by laura a 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just go over 1 time and she will be bouned to not invite you again.
2006-07-25 10:31:07 · answer #11 · answered by li_da_mi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋