How can I change my cynical ways?

Question

Basically I've realized that I'm an insensative a$$hole. I was watching Last Comic Standing and my friends were mad at me that I wasn't clapping for the handicapped comic...I said, whatever, you guys aren't clapping because he's funny, you're clapping because he's handicapped....

Answer 1

i dont think your friends would feel the need to clap for a handicapped guy... considering hes on tv and has no idea that your friends were clapping for him... maybe they actually thought he was funny! it sounds like you might have approached the situation with a negative attitude once you saw that the comedian was handicapped, so you judged too early and figured that he could still get applause even if he wasnt funny because of his condition. possibly not true! try to keep an open mind, and be very open to being proved wrong, because that will help open your eyes! good luck!

Answer 2

Simple shift from cynical to sceptical. Instead of writing everything off wholesale, try questioning it instead.
People might still call you cynical; mind you if they're clapping for a handicapped person because of a disability, are they more cynical (do they assume (s)he can't earn money any other way, or this is all (s)he has)?
I don't think you're insensitive on account of not finding a joke funny. Think in this fashion: What if the comic thinks they're the greatest because everyone's clapping, only to find one day they are the emperor wearing no clothes? That's a pretty harsh fate, especially for someone with enough problems in their life already.

Answer 3

that may have been a missed oppertunity to learn to experiance and share compassion . One of lifes lessons that is very rewarding. If you can imagine for a moment being in another persons shoes and feel what they might be going through it will help you better understand them and yourself as well as assist you in building your communication skills. you are not bad for not clapping, but you wished the celebration for the person that was handicapped. They took a risk and became volnerable in doing something they enjoyed in front of alot of people . that took strength and courage. maybe that is what your friends where clapping for is his effort

Answer 4

actually that is not being insensitive that is being honest about your feelings...you didn't think he was funny. my aunt was blind and my uncle disabled from a plane accident and i have worked with the deaf for a number of years, no of them would have wanted anyone giving them special treatment or unearned respect or attention just because of their disability...they just wanted to be treated fairly and like everyone else. that being say you state you are cynical, try finding something positive in all you see everyday, start small. even the bad. my grandmother used to always say 'something good always comes out of something bad', i used to think she was nuts but then as the years passed i realized she was right. try looking to the positive, don't dwell on the negative and hold true to who you are, you're doing fine. as for the handicapped, they are people just like you and i except their 'shells' or outward bodies are damaged...that doesn't make them different in their 'souls' though. as for this handicapped comic, he is well aware of his disability and i can guarantee he knew it would shine the light on it. he can deal with it otherwise he wouldn't be up there....it sounds like he is ok with it and wants a career otherwise....would he be funny without the disability...that up to the audience but i doubt he'd want people laughing just because he's disabled. one thing you can do is have you and your friends watch him with their eyes closed...is he still funny

Answer 5

I was never insensitive, per say, but I used to be very sarcastic and had a bit of a negative attitude. I don't know why I changed, but I did. Whenever I would hear someone being criticized, I would try to give them the benifit of the doubt and think something good about them. It taught me how to imagine the other person's perspective, too.

Answer 6

Would need a better example of your cynicism to answer your question. What you mentioned is honesty not bad in any way - in my opinion! It may be that you're just not an @@@ kisser like your friends are.

I thought the guy was funny. I give him props for trying, but my husband didn't particularly care for him. Differences in opinions color our world!

Here's to you, honest guy!!!

Answer 7

I think because of his physical appearance you felt sorry for him and uncomfortable.Laughing at people different from us was something that was not allowed in my family growing up.If the same jokes were said while your eyes were closed,would you have reacted differently?

Answer 8

Hey Tiger,

The best way is to treat people the way you want to be treated. This is Respect! You will be a much better person for it.

Answer 9

Don't change. They're the ones who should have more integrity and be honest and objective instead of coddling people.

Answer 10

You could fall in love, or you could feel pity. Either of those would work. Trouble is, they will probably only work if your heart is broken one way or another.