My boyfriend got in a financial spot and needed more money than he had at the time eventhough he makes a killin' and I of course volunteered to help him out. He fussed and fought but finally gave in. Well I didn't have this lump sum of money so I "borrowed" out of my college fund. Well my mom had to sign the money over and now she's furious with me and him and says I treat her like dirt. That statement also had to do with the fact that I moved out to live on my own when she didn't want me to. Well he's already paying me back the money and I knew he would because he isn't a thief. He's mad at her and she's mad at me and I am stuck in the middle. And they are both hardheaded and don't listen. She's calling him names and it makes me mad. This is my future husband and I love him. Plus everyone sees my mom as the one who you can run to if you need help. They were wrong. I am so upset about this and I don't want to be caught in the middle of all this. Some one please give me some advice.
2006-07-25 02:36:49 · 2 answers · asked by BamaBelle 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
ouch! well, first off your mom isn't probably mad at you for moving out on your own. we all have to leave eventually. but your mom sounds a little over-protective about you. are you the youngest or maybe the only girl? this has a lot to do with it. moms tend not to want their babies to grow up. maybe it has to do with them feeling older or maybe insignificant. i mean, here you are, a younger, usually thinner model of your mom and you just starting out in life. she's probably feeling as if she doesn't mean squat to you anymore. you should talk to her and tell her that even though you do love her that what she is doing isn't going to make you move back home anytime soon. i'm sure your mom will always be there for you when you're in trouble. my father is and i'm usually in trouble for something or another. hell, i'm 21 years old and i still can't stop spending bill money. what she is doing to you is going to make you push and run away from your mom because of anger. you need to try and make her understand EXACTLY how you feel. DON'T BEAT AROUND THE BUSH! as for the boyfriend he has every right to be angry. but you also need to make him understand that she is your mom. i don't know if he's calling your mom names but if he loves you and respects you he is not going to say anything like that around you because he knows how it makes you feel. i know it's hard being stuck in the middle of a fight (see source below). explain to him that you're willing to talk to your mother about the name calling but you're not willing to be in the middle of the fight. all you can really do is talk with both of them and explain your feelings. hopefully they love and respect you enough to stop this (from it sounds like to mean) immature fight. they are grown people and grown people learn to work and live around people they don't like. (if i just started screaming and fighting everyone i don't like at work i'd be out of a job!) and if all else fails then tell them both THAT YOU ARE NOT WILLING TO BE IN THE MIDDLE OF A STUPID FIGHT! i mean, straight up. sometimes anger is the only way to get a hard-headed person to see what you want them to understand. and as for the college fund thing, your mom want you go to school and make something good of yourself. she felt that that money was for education only and when you went and spent it then your "wasting your future education away." But it IS techincally your money. Maybe you should have talked to her about it before "borrowing" the cash. If you did and she signed it over then she was willing to help and she's being a hypocrite otherwise. I can only wish you the best of luck. You can always e-mail me for anything else or if you just need to talk!
2006-07-25 02:53:21 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
stick with ur future husband and leave ur mom alone and after awhile she see tat shes wrong
2006-07-25 09:41:36 · answer #2 · answered by ppunkxsskater 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋