How do I fit into society and thw world, or rather do I belong at all?

Question

Background: near 30, no friends or relationships, spritual, but not of a religious faith (and don't suggest another .. one aspect i've explored my whole life and what i am okay with). I don't drive a car, nor have any desire to ever do so (suck at it, and think it as enslavement, not freedom) I don't club, or bar hop, and most of my activities are solo. lived with family for 3 1/2 following last job quit / suicide try.

Yes, i've been hospitalized before, given 6 different diagnosis over the yrs, seen 7 therapists and shrinks (last 2 recommended no meds).

In a nut shell, keep thinking I just don't belong to society or the world. Looking for reason or purpose to why i'm still here, but can't figure it out. No, not shy (use to be, but not now) just doesn't see how I belong.

Has been given the standard don't give up bits, the you're just lazy, or the just end it .. I'm just looking for a new possibility, thanks.

Answer 1

I think you need to focus more on you rather than the world around you. Happiness springs from within. Only when you are personally happy will others find you attractive and then want to hang out with you. If you decide the person you are is mean, angry, and detatched, expect to spend a lot of time alone. It's not a question of giving up but instead a realization that being yourself and presenting a that self to others requires comprimise.

Answer 2

My theory is - we try to live too much by expected standards of happiness - and no wonder some have problems and unhappy because they cant seem to fit in.

You seen the original characters who march to the beat of a different drummer? I don't mean you gotta get a Mohawk and dress in a tu-tu..., but what interests you most? Don't worry about people who may say it ain't right in the head.

The only exception would be if you have fun "physically" hurting others. Then there's a problem.

Does unusual art fuse you? Go for it. Just don't use a set gage for happiness. When you get down to it, many people put on a mask when around others and SOME of them are very convincing at being the life of the party. But inside they are gloom and despair.

There should be at least two or three (even just one is good) interests that appeals to you, not necessarily anyone else. I am a solitary person, and realized I don't have to be a big socializer and am most comfortable by myself - doing what I want to do without someone nagging me to death.

AND there is another recourse; Helping others just for you! By that I mean - when we give into it, we can really feel satisfied by doing good deeds for others, even in secret! Being a Mystery Do-Gooder, is as close to being a Masked Super Hero as a human being can get.

Hope this info helps. Just lose the "what others think of me" thing and lose the "This and that makes others happy, not me, so I'm a loser" attributes society unconsciously throws on each other.

Answer 3

Read this whole webpage that is all about you and your real relationship with other people. You will find it amazing if you read it. Also read last 2 sentences telling you where to go to get natural help with physical and mental issues. Plus short uplifting story.

http://phifoundation.org/heal.html

Answer 4

Read this book, soon. It will help. It saved me from killing myself.
"The Feeling Good Handbook" by Dr. David Burns

Also visit my webpage and read my story. Email me.
http://www.geocities.com/seabulls69/AntidepressantThatWorks.html

You need a friend and I can help. You're worth it... I can tell. Life is great now, thanks to Dr. Burns showing me how to fix my thoughts.

'nuff said?