How can I prove someone is a witch?

Question

There is a witch in our town. I know she is because she has a mole on the side of her nose and she is not married. I brought this issue up at our last council meeting, but they did not accept my accusations on face-value (sic).

How can I prove to the council she is a witch, so that we might move forward with the necessary task of burning her alive?

I also saw her laying naked in her back yard, while spying on her through the large hedge around its border. She was rubbing a magical ointment over her skin.

Only witches would do such a thing.

Answer 1

You poor thing! You are so behind the times!

If your town is anything like mine, burning a witch at a stake is nearly impossible. The town will have to have a bond election to pay for building a pyre and a stake, and that can take time. It's probably easier if you give her a card for a very good plastic surgeon who can get rid of that pesky mole. Once that's out of the way, introduce her to a nice man who is allergic to cats. He can marry her, and her black cat familiar will have to go. (I realize you didn't mention the familiar, but all witches have them, right?)

If that seems too time-consuming for you, you can try paying off an influential young girl in your town to fake fits and convince other young girls that they are bewitched. If they can have their fits in a council meeting, so much the better. It worked in "The Crucible" didn't it?

It is so refreshing to see a good soul like yourself who takes the Bible literally and wants to obey every single word in it. It does say in Exodus 22:18 "Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live" doesn't it? Wow, if only everyone could be so pious and good!

Answer 2

Torture is the only way.

Before the torture, tell her in detail what you're going to do, this in most cases would make the accused confess to what ever the inquisitor (you) want to hear.

If she didn't confess when tortured, and if she still didn't confess after all the torture then she has been helped by the devil. Have a clerk writing down every thing that she says, also add own bits that aren't true to prove her guilty.

Each round of torture should be worse than the first, the torture should be paid for out of funds seized from her family.

No matter how much the accused screams in pain the inquisitors must carry on with no sign of remorse or regret for what you are doing as it is the correct thing. Cross yourself and wear herb amulets for protection and sprinkle equipment with holy water.

History:
The main torture in France was the rack, many under went this torture. The accused were horse whipped, red hot pincers were used to rip of flesh. Thumb screws used to crush the bones of there fingers and toes they even pulled out there finger nails then suck needles in the quick's where the nails once were as if they hadn't already inflicted enough pain and suffering. The accused hand were put in to pots of boiling water, hot oil pored all over there bodies.
They had boots called bootikins these were made to cut up the flesh and break the bones of the accused, eyes poked out by irons they were also set alight in the bid to get them to confess. The inquisitors were allowed to do what ever they wanted to, as long as they got a confession. Even when the accused did confess it didn't stop there,they were then put on a steak and burned or sent to the gallows,on the way there they were burned,branded, flogged there hands and tongue's cut off. In the 17 th century the church started to lose its power, the inquisition started to collapse. By this time millions had been murdered at the hands of the inquisition woman children even babies not that babies could confess, even men didn't escape they to were tortured and murdered.
The reasons most of these people suffered at the inquisitions hand were they were in the wrong place at the wrong time, or some one just held a grudge or didn't like the person. Just something being said, no real evidence against them.

This is the way to go. It's called culture.

Answer 3

1. Look for people who associate with the moon and cast spells at night.

2. Watch for someone who travels on a broom.

3. Emulate primitive people, who believed witches were to blame when a cow was sick or a crop had failed. Blame witches for everything.

4. Search for 12 of these hags, who reportedly meet with the devil in a meadow or graveyard each Friday, which is known as the witch's Sabbath.

5. Watch for eyebrows that meet over the nose, birthmarks, red hair or eyes that look evil. Be wary of people who make love potions, charms and cure-alls from frog toes, snake eyes and cat claws.

6. Listen for people who mumble strange chants or put hexes or spells on others. Interrogate those who carve small wax or clay images of others, especially if they make pin cushions out of these "witch's dolls."

Tips:
Use salt, bread or spitting over the left shoulder as countermeasures to a witch's work. Paint your barn red and add a hex sign, emulating the Pennsylvania Dutch.

Place a broom across your threshold. No real witch can resist a chance to hop right on and fly away.

Answer 4

a mole on her nose and not married???? hey wake up young man... there are a lot of unmarried women out there look almost like that. what make u think she is a witch?

also, how do u know she is rubbing magical ointment on her body? do u saw the label on the bottle wrote: MAGICAL OINTMENT - FOR EXTERMAL USE TO ENHANCE MAGICAL ABILITY AND TO BEWITCHING MORTAL. KEEP AWAY FROM STUPID MORTAL?

thirdly... u spy on your new neighbourhood sunbathing at her own backyard? you've got a big problem here, you r tresspassing. and you can be caught for doing that.

HELLO.... who is the one doing the wrong thing. even if she is a real witch, what has she done? but i really hope u'll get caught for spying her. peeping tom!!!

Answer 5

Proving someone is a witch is about as useful as trying to prove the earth is flat. It is highly irrational. Also, facial growths and marital status could be due to a variety of factors, not merely one's spiritual practices.

Burning someone alive is a heinous crime. If you are thinking about things such as this, then you need to seek professional counseling at once. They can help you far more than anyone online can.

Answer 6

Are you on a Witch hunt humm
Well you want to watch out for the men in white coats don't come looking for you lol
Maybe you should look in a mirror you know when we see something in others we don't like it is a reflection of ourselves
Has she harm you ? the answer to that would be NO
I think you are living in the dark ages
Witches are excepted in society now didn't you know

Love & Blessings
Milly

Answer 7

Dude, have you been living in the seventeeth century? I happen to know a few Wiccans (nature witches, basically) whom are my closest friends. You better watch out- if that woman is a witch, you're going to be hexed!

(PS: To prove if she's a witch, just ask her, or otherwise, catch her in the act of magic. There are a number of magical assessments you can use to test, too, but that would mean you'd be doing witchcraft too.)

Answer 8

firstly lemme tell u dear u are a true moron in sense that if you had this much intellect that you could identify a witch from a regular lady (who is being called so b'cz she has a mole on the side of her nose) you would'v found a better method to eradicate her than go out on yahoo answers and seek the anwer ......
Leave that poor lady alone.....

Answer 9

I would consult the International Brethren of WitchWatchers. They are a secret organization, lead by the Pope, who specialize in Witch detection and stoning. They have secret offices in most hospitals and psychiatric clinics in the country. They use the “psychiatrist” front in order to fund their activities as well as avoid legal entanglements.
Just go to one of these facilities and give them your information. After a short “intake process,” they’ll investigate your claims and debrief you.

Answer 10

Have you ever considered psychological help?

And besides, if she was a true witch, she would have already done away with you.

On another note, do you want to spend life in prison?

Answer 11

ask her if she is. She wont be ashamed of it. Witches are proud of being apart from God and Jesus.....as far as burning her.....Jesus brought mercy and grace. Burning her is not the thing to do. Treat her like everyone else. I suggest you read one of the gospels so you dont embarass yourself again.