Help with schooling my teenager.?

Question

I have a 17 year-old son who has been living with his mother. Unfortunately he dropped out of school at 14.

He's almost 18 and needs to improve himself and he knows this. The problem is he doesn't have the direction he needs to learn what he needs.

He should be studying for a GED but he's not. He needs help an frankly I don't know where to start.

His parents are both educated but Mom has problems thus the lack of education.

Where can I start with this? HELP!!!!!

Additional detail. He doesn't have a car and does not drive.

It's not time to punish him for his mother's mistakes people he needs help not roadblocks.

Answer 1

Start w/ the books I listed below.

This will take time. You will have to establish his trust. He needs to believe that you believe in him, and aren't just trying to get him out of the house.

Find out what makes him feel loved (his love language). Saturate him with this.

Then, find out what he's passionate about. Give him opportunities to pursue those...slowly at first.

Also set up opportunities for him to prove he's a man. YOU have to bestow manhood on him. YOU MUST be involved. But, you can't just say it, he needs to prove it to himself too.

If you can do these three things, he'll have the confidence to move on by himself.

Answer 2

If you want him to get a GED, start with a GED book and some study time together. The books are self-teaching, meaning if you can read, you can teach your own self. But it helps to have a partner to talk it over with, and keep you on-task.

If you'd rather not go that route, you could consider a formal homeschooling program. Get him caught up to college level in the core classes, using the same homeschool materials you'd use for a younger student. Then, when he's learned enough to your satisfaction, you can issue a valid high school diploma, and he can move on to a local junior college, trade school, or even university. He can do all that with a GED too, but it's just another option.

If you want to do homeschooling high school but aren't sure where to start, start with a GED book. It's a very basic education in the core subjects, at about a 10th grade level, so it buys you some time to figure out what else you want to do with the kid, and it gets him up to a good minimum levels in his studies in a fairly quick timeframe. Most GED books are designed to take 30 days, at 1-2 hours a day. This is what I did when I homeschooled a child for grades 10-12, started with the GED book and branched out from there.

Answer 3

Your talking about my kid.

Dropped out at 14, lives with Mom, studing for his GED.
Except now he is 22. Has been studing for the GED 8 yrs now and Mom bought him a car at 18.

I`m trying to get my kid in the Military now as I have been worrying and thinking about this for 6 yrs without a solution other than the military. He has started to warm up to the idea and actually took the GED test. Didn`t pass but wants to try again. Going to see the world sparked something thankfully.

Your kid is going nowhere and will go nowhere as long as he lives with Mom. He can`t live with you either. He needs structure, disipline, and a feeling of worth and you can`t do it as he can always run back to Mom. The military can give him all of that and a career too when he gets out.
You know in your heart he won`t take any of those courses offered in these other answers. He will just study for his GED off and on for years. Mom makes it comfortable for a low self esteeme kid to stay right where he is.

Good Luck you`ll need it.
Dad

Answer 4

There are two issues:
1) Motivation. You can help him in this by encouraging him every time you see him that his past mistakes do not ruin his future and that his past choices don't have any control over him, he is his own man. If he wants to do a think, encourage him that he can make ANYTHING happen if he has the will to make it so. Do not focus on the past but help him focus on the future and on making wise and moral decisions that have no backlash. Help him to understand that he is ultimately responsible for his life and that if he won't lead himself to better pasture - he will never arrive there.
Tell him that you will love him no matter what he does, that the choice to be at the top of his game or at the bottom is his choice but that he will suffer or enjoy the fruit of his actions.
2) Mechanics - As a practical matter, beginning a thing relives a weight from a man's mind. Once he starts and is encouraged, begin to build vision in him for the future. Ask, "If you could do anything- what would be your dream job that you would enjoy doing?" Don't focus on how much money it makes - money is not everything. BE VERY ENCOURAGING! Any Goal that represents a stretch for him at this state is good and should be lauded. He should be encouraged by your absolute conviction that he can accomplish it with effort - even if he says brain surgeon. Use what he says to steer him to apply himself to what ever needs to be reinforced to do that job. Invariably it will be math, science, etc. Build vision in him that success is not just to pass the GED test but that knowing the material represents a goal that he needs for his future success. I understand that if you score high enough on the GED that they actually give you a high school diploma. Good Luck!

Answer 5

A GED is a good place to start.

Truly it's probably pretty simple and he will need to do very little to pass the GED.

But, it's better to be safe than sorry. Head to the library and they will typically carry books on how to take the GED, how to prepare for it, what sorts of questions will be in there, and so on.

Get a copy for him, or two if you both want to go through it at the same time so that you can help him with everything and see what's in there. And then just walk through it. It may be that once you take the practice tests you'll get an idea of where there needs to be work and then you can use the information in there to work on those areas if they exist.

Good luck with this, I hope it all works out.

Love as always,

Sebastian

Answer 6

Have him take an interest inventory (google it on line). This will give you and him feedback on areas he seems genuinely interested in pursuing.

From there, there are multiple on-line avenues he can pursue on his terms to reach a level of maturity, confidence, and knowledge to be productive.

Somewhere in this scheme, a job of some type, any type, even if it is dog walking, detailing cars, whatever, needs to be employed to allow him to earn "freedom" money. By earning some worth, it will also bolster is esteem while the on-line educational avenues back up that bolstering.

Good luck....I know that they don't come with instructions, ya' gotta love em!

Answer 7

start at the local ABE (Adult Basic Education) facility (often located at the local technical school) or the local high school guidance counselor. Most taxpayers don't realize the resources available to ALL there - career info, testing, financial aid, etc. also, try the local literacy council - usually they offer help (reading, studying for GED, spelling, subject tutoring) to adults, but they can give you local leads to the help your son deserves. If you have the funds, try Sylvan or hiring a tutor (check with the local community college for a starving college student).

Answer 8

I HAVE THE PERFECT SOLUTION FOR YOU BUDDY!!!!!

I am 17 myself and homeschooled online, its the best thing that has ever happened to me, i am now making A's. www.compuhigh.com , It's an accredited highschool, and all your work is graded by real teachers. You dont even need books or cd's. Its the cheapest online accredited highschool i could find. I'm enrolling this year in the 11th grade. The have diploma programs. for me its 885$ a year, which, trust me isnt bad compared to the other ones i found, some ranged from 1500-3500 a year. I trust this online highschool, especially since everything is graded by real teachers, and you get real help.

Answer 9

Hire a tutor, get them to come to your place, even if it is just a one off. Get them to discuss the issues and the topics with you and your son together.

With that in mind, work together on the issue. It doesn't matter if niether of you know, work it out together. Work as a team and NO PUTDOWNS!!! Make it fun, laugh, celebrate the smallest of victories but don't stop halfway!

If you have questions, save them up and bring the tutor back. This way you save money too because regular lessons cost. Work in between the lessons and bring them back only when you need it.

Answer 10

well you know Im still in school and alot of my friends wanna drop out.Well they dont because I get them to remember that they have alot of stuff to look forward too in life.So what you might wanna do is ask him if he has anything that he wants to do when he gets older?And if he dont know yet...remind him that if he dont go back to school to get his GED he might as well start memorizing the lines,"would you like fries with that"? thats what my teacher told me.But tell him he wont even get a job like that now because they want kids with at least a high school diploma.But the most thing you can do is love him and try to get him to go back for his future. good luck :)