Living w/ my sis and hubby!!?

Question

I am currently living w/ my sis and her hubby and I don't have a job yet so when she askeds me to do something I do it, I feel obligated of course.

Now it's like a everyday thing and they leave their **** on the floor and just don;t even try to clean there messes. When her husband gets home he goes straight to his room and I am still stuck w/ the kids!!! then when she gets home it does not get much better.

My hubby is looking for a job and almost has one but god I don;t know if I can make it!?!?!? Should I talk to them, I have tried 2 times and it's like she says things will change but they don't.

Her hubby is always talking about my husband aslo, saying he
s worthless, when he don't even know him. All I can thing of is he's jealous because he really don't know him at all.

HELP!!

Looney Dude, We have 2 kids and I am doing everything in there best intrests. How can you say we need to grow up, We are looking everyday for a job, so before being so inconsiderate you need to ask.

Answer 1

There are a few things left unclear, so I've got to do a little guessing. It sounds like you are living with your sis without your husband, who is elsewhere trying to find work.

It seems that the behavior you're complaining about wasn't so bad at first, but is worsening. The reason for this is that they are tired of having you live with them, but haven't the heart to say so directly. Having you around is like having an extra kid. The comments about your husband are not jealousy, but are a result of having to do your hubby's job, that is, supporting you.

You're an adult now. I know life is hard. I've been without, I've struggled to pay the rent, been near bankruptcy, and wondered where the next meal is coming from, so please understand when I say this: You need to start acting like an adult.

You need to get out of that house now and go wherever your husband is. If you guys are out of money, perhaps you have something you can pawn or sell. Find the smallest, cheapest studio apartment you can find, get two chairs and a table, a full size mattress, a blanket or two, and a hot plate. Both of you should be at every temp service in town getting whatever temp work you can muster while he searches for full time work, and while you do as well.

The only people who should be taking care of you two right now are you two. I gather from your question that you and your hubby have no kids. If that's the case, you guys can definitely manage it. It won't be easy, and it won't be comfortable, but as someone who once worked from 2am to 5pm seven days a week to get by, I know it can be done. You have to decide to grow up and get to it and stop depending on others.

Yeah, family's there to support you and help you out when you fall flat, but I don't think you guys are really flat. You've just got to get on the ball.

Edit:

I don't mean to offend at all. Having two kids does make a difference, because it takes more to support two kids. I have three, I know. Still, I still think your sis and your hubby are acting out the way they are for the same reasons I listed above.

Look, even with kids, I had to find out the hard way that nobody was really going to help me out and look out for me. You've asked a huge question with very little detail, so it's hard to know even what you mean by "best for the kids." Kids can often do without all but the very basic needs. State programs are available that would pay your sis or a friend to provide "daycare" for your kids while you and hubby are out looking for work or working. There are all sorts of aid programs out there for housing, food, etc. There are ways, but it's important that you don't blame sis and her hubby for being frustrated with caring for you. It's still your and your hubby's job to do so.

I am not at all trying to be harsh, but the world's a hard place and it works this way whether or not I say it really nicely or not. Again, sorry to offend, but I'm just trying to be realistic.

Answer 2

hey i understand your position.Dont let your sister's husband talk bad about your husband.tell him u will not tolerate it. if he tells u its my house. tell him you are not here for free. u look after kids and do all the little jobs around. one more thing try to contact your friends your hubby;s friends and see if he can get a good job soon and then move out. and before leaving tell your your sister;s husband that your husband is not worthless.

Answer 3

Sounds like you have plenty of motivation to get out - probably by design. Light a fire under your husband for him to get a job and get out of Dodge.

You really shouldn't expect anything as long as they are providing a roof over your head.

Answer 4

you need to get out of your sisters house. as long as you are not contributing to the household you become sorta a slave to them which means you are the maid and cleaning and keeping the kids is the way you are paying them to stay there. so move out...

Answer 5

you living with them they doing favour to you Gaye's should be thank full & get a job& move out

Answer 6

get a job and enjoy live