now that i found the love of my life and he want to get married in december hes in the army, but im scared to get married with out my parent concern, i just want to be with him for the rest of my life i dont want to say no to marriage but im a little to young for it so im thinking of telling him we should just get engaged even tough my parents have no clue about it. if my parents ever know that im dating they will kill me. please help.
2006-07-24 13:00:19 · 8 answers · asked by Edwina n 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If you're 20, you're legally an adult, and it's your life...if you want to get married, there's no legal way they can stop you....make your own choices...
2006-07-24 13:03:13 · answer #1 · answered by gokart121 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You mention nothing as to why your parents would be upset over you finding some one you love. What i can say is to proceed wth caution and don't let your emotions, blind you into rushing into a marriage and you end up regreting this decision. There is a saying that goes like this." Marriage is like a besiege city, those on the inside want to get out, and those on the outside want to get in.
You are 20 years have you educated your self to a level if things turn sour with this guy you have some thing to fall on. You made no mention as to how long you know your boyfriend as well as the age gap between you two.
Take your time and don't rush into marriage. If you are lucky to have older friends that are Married or Divorce, that you can trust. Ask them about marriage and you will be surprise as to what you learn. Some of them have gone through ( World War One and Wold WarTwo ) interms of heart ache and pain.
In ending i don't have any thing wrong with marriage, but seeing the pain and grief cause by a marriage going sour. My advice to people wanting to jump into it, is to be smart and use your head.
Listen to your gut feelings for signs that some thing is not right. and i can't stress enough on taking things one day at a time. Go a head and tell him you two will be engage for now.
Using my family as an example. Please don't rush into marriage as some people once they put the ring on your finger, you see another side to them that you will not like. Some people change for the better and some of the worse.
2006-07-24 13:51:59 · answer #2 · answered by Premio 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are 20 years old!!! You have your own life now, once you turn 18 you are concidered as an adult and adults make up there own mind about what they want to do, if you want to get married just do it, don't worrie about what your parents will think it's your life now, they can give you advice and stand by you but they are not aloud to tell you what to do now, you have left the nest
I suggesst talking to them about what you want to do over dinner or on the phone, if you find it hard to talk to them write a letter.
Good luck.
2006-07-24 13:08:10 · answer #3 · answered by Tammy848 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you reside below their roof, yeah, i be responsive to you have heard that many cases. It doesnt count if your 10 or eighty, they're your father and mom, and their rules will stick! i've got by no ability heard of a guy who's spanish. Hispanic or Latino, i've got heard of! Are you particular you're mature sufficient for a relationship? in case you havent found out the reality you will constantly be your father and mom infant, no count how previous you get. they could look controlling, yet they're purely wanting what's suitable for you in ALL issues. No they'll by no ability trust each determination you're making. in case you desire to have it your way, pass out! evaluate what you will income/lose in the previous you do. you assert you dont drink, yet mentioned earlier you all started ingesting a speedy time at events. then you quite say you're a virgin, yet ought to lie asserting there is not any longer something happening between you and the hispanic guy. So this is it? i think of you're immature and puzzled, and as long as your father and mom are offering each thing you have or want, they'll proceed to regulate it and you. pass out, or discover ways to settle for this is what this is!
2016-10-08 06:59:10 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If there is a doubt in your mind then wait. Since he is in the military he wants to know that there is always going to be someone waiting at home, at least wait until he is stationed some were and you can move there. If you are living with your parents then they have some right to tell you what to do. Not to sound mean but I say no don't do it right now.
2006-07-24 13:12:06 · answer #5 · answered by TRAINWRECK 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like your parents have an awful lot of control over your life. You CAN do what you want. You are 20 years old, make a decision and stick to it. Good Luck!
2006-07-24 13:09:18 · answer #6 · answered by gentle giant 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if ur 20 then u have ur own life that ur parents and nobody else can take control of.they dont get a say in ur personal life.they dont get 2 choose who u marry.its all up 2 u.ur an adult,who runs her own life.go for it.
good luck!
2006-07-24 13:04:59 · answer #7 · answered by imiss_aubree_jake_lissie_taytay 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you aren't ready for the responsibility of marriage, don't do it. You owe it to yourself and your partner to do the right thing. Take your time if it's really meant to be it will be.
2006-07-24 13:04:03 · answer #8 · answered by loveorlust06 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋