OK I have posted questions before about the issue...My boyfriend wanted to see what else was out there. We have been together for 4 1/2 years since we were 16, now 21. Recently I decided to NOT give up on my relationship with my ex, and instead told him that he had 2 months to do whatever he wanted to with no questions by me and on the first day of Sept. he had to decide if he wanted to continue to be single or stay with me....So since i told him this he has been treating me 10 times better than he has in the past year as well as making plans for us to do things, taking me out, being very affectionate etc.. I asked him if he is taking my offer and he said YES and to not worry. . So my question is what do u think about this???
2006-07-24 11:28:42 · 13 answers · asked by sweetchic117 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
OK let me say a lil more because the responses that I have been getting are a little off....We Have been together for 4 1/2 years I went away for school 2 of the four years...during that time we had an open realtionship and tested the waters then. I have been on dates with other men and I do believe that I am to be with my boyfriend. I don't think that he doesn't love me its just that we are young and people are in his ear saying things to him to make him think he needs to be single. Also I want to say that because we have been together since we were 16 does not mean that we are not in love, the reason for me making that decision to allow him to do what he wants is because I do love him, I would like to say that anything is possible and yes i believe that i can find my soul-mate at any age. I don't regret anything I do in my life....because tomorrow is not promised. Of all forms of cautions in life, caution in love is the most fatal to true happiness.
2006-07-24 11:29:03 · update #1
You gave him the rope to stray and hang himself.
2006-07-24 11:31:11 · answer #1 · answered by The Big Shot 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think this is a very mature and brave thing that you are doing and it's the correct thing to do. I meet my soul mate when I was 13 and now I'm in my late 20's. You can find love what ever age your at it just hard to find it when your younger because you are still going through changes and your not really sure who you are yet.
The old saying of if you love someone set them free and if they come back to you it was meant to be is so true. You can't smother someone into staying with you and if you do they will leave down the line anyway. This is very wise of you and just know that when he makes his decision in the end then you will truly know if your love can and will survive through this thing called life.
2006-07-24 11:39:19 · answer #2 · answered by nm 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You said you have had an open relationship with him for 4 1/2 years; then you said you gave him an ultimatum: "You got 2 months to decide whether to stay with me or be single, but test the waters for 2 months if you want." Did I miss anything?
When you're in a so-called "open relationhip", all bets are off, you have no right to an expectation of being his exclusive girlfriend. You made your bed, lay in it already.
2006-07-24 12:05:13 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think this is totally up to you if you feel like you can let him do this and you are cool with it then go right ahead. In my opinion I would not like this because then he may think he can do whatever he would like to when he you do end up back together. I was in this type of situation before and it did not work out for me. I could not get over the fact of her hooking up with 30 year olds and when we tried again it just made things worse. But I say hey if you are an understanding person go for it just be sure not to get walked on.
2006-07-24 11:37:58 · answer #4 · answered by yeeeehaw4 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont think you made the right choice by letting him have too much space and still be with you...
you see he is being nice to you because you are not asking for anything in return . you guys are the same but just no relationship well at the moment and he feels free and with no commitment. i guess if he had to think about it good but to agree for him to go and do what he wants not a good idea.
i bet once september comes hes going to tell you that he needs more time .. like they say why buy the cow whe you can get the milk for free.. (im not calling you a cow lol ))
2006-07-24 11:35:50 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems you already havean idea about your bf behavior. I think that the break is a good idea but the truth is his feelings can and will change. Most High school relationships don't last. It's amazing you've survived this long but don't count on settling down and raising children with him. You are still young and so is he. Don't expect anything, it'll only bring disappointment.
2006-07-24 11:37:56 · answer #6 · answered by Erin E 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Relationships such as you have described seem not to last very long. You really haven't made up your own mind with this relationship.>> "I can find my soul mate at any age." <
2006-07-24 11:45:08
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answer #7
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answered by Teacher 6
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well it sounds like you are on the right track, maybe he should mature a little, I wish there was more women like you. No there is nothing wrong with what you are doing. Hopefully he does not get another girl pregnant. Make sure he gets tested for STD's before you do anything else.
2006-07-24 11:33:00 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i imagine you're purely asking... no begging for hardship. in case you enable someone to step out on you, in spite of the settlement or difficulty, they slowly lose appreciate for you and your thoughts. you're under no circumstances going to understand what his genuine thoughts are because you've forced him to play video games with you. i'm sorry, yet i imagine the top is close to for this courting. maximum men have a tendency to cover their tracks by showering their women those with affection to make it look incoceivable that they could ever look at somebody else. do not clown your self.
2016-10-15 04:08:24 · answer #9 · answered by windy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Id love to answer this but Im dont think Im getting the flow of your question.. only thing I got out of it is, you told to that on 9-1 you want him to erither go out with out woman or stay with you, and since you said that hes much nicer. Thats all I know, andif that,, then.. Hes thinking that you dont enjoy him, so hes trying harder, and I dout that he will leave you,, on sptember 1st,, I dont know.. But I hope I understood your question.
2006-07-24 11:35:01 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if hes telling u that he wants to try other people then thats not good. that means he dosent love u as much baby! so your best bet is to continue to find someone else. and if hes treating u nicely its some form of technque to make u miss him... let go of him now wo if wont hurt so bad
2006-07-24 11:32:04 · answer #11 · answered by gaurdianangelic 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋