He has just started this behavior. When we get after him for something he will yell 'I hate you' or when playing with his brother (5) and he doesn't get his way he will tell him that he hates him or he doesn't like him. My husband and myself do not talk that way and they are not in childcare. I would like this behavior to stop and would like ideas to get him to stop. Has anyone gone through this and what worked?
2006-07-24 11:15:33 · 21 answers · asked by mom of 2 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
He is trying to express his anger and frustration verbally.This is a good thing. Now he just needs to learn more acceptable ways to say ' I'm angry at you' or 'I'm getting frustrated. All of my 5 kids went through this exact same stage. I just told them" I understand that you are angry at me, I'm not too happy with you either, but I still love you." They all grew out of it wilthout any sort of punishment and learned that it is okay to express your feelings.
2006-07-24 12:48:10 · answer #1 · answered by ppqppq10 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My son went threw the same thing. I told him i wasn't talking to him anymore until he said he was sorry and he should not say that and that it is not nice to say those things to anyone. After a few time of him getting the cold shoulder from me and telling him i am not talking to you unless you say your sorry and tell me why you shouldn't say those things he finally stopped. So maybe his brother can do that and see if it works. Good luck but he will forget he ever said those things.
2006-07-25 17:36:12 · answer #2 · answered by starmoeshadance 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's testing his boundaries and now it's time for you to test yours. You can make him stop. You're the mom and mom's have all the power.
Yes! I have gone through it. With 3 kids! With one kid I would take away the favorite toy. I wanted it to stop and he wanted his toy - I won.
The second kid would say 'I hate you' and I'd tell her "No you don't you're just mad that you didn't get your way."
Kid #3 tried that mess and I asked him to tell me what it means. when he couldn't I told him not to say it again until he knew what it meant. I haven't heard it since.
All in all, find what best works for you. Child rearing is based on trial and error and alot of hair color and margaritas - lol
2006-07-25 14:41:44 · answer #3 · answered by NyteWing 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's just doing it to get a rise out of you. My middle child tried that on me once. I just said - "good, now I know my job here is done." And walked away. Needless to say, he figured out really quick that he couldn't get what he wanted, and I wasn't going to budge.
If you react, he'll keep doing it. If you give in to him, he'll keep doing it. Just let it be. This is a test. And it is only a test. There will be plenty more to come.
2006-07-24 19:59:46 · answer #4 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my sister is having this problem with her son. he is 3 and keeps telling my 3 year old he hates him if he loses a video game or trips over him or whatever. i keep my son from saying it too by telling him we say we don't like something because hate is a bad word. so when my son gets mad at me he says "i don't like you anymore!!" instead. the way i deal with my sister's son when he says he hates someone is by telling him it's not a nice word and we don't say it in my house, and that he may not like me but i LOVE him. that usually makes him be quiet.
2006-07-24 21:31:48 · answer #5 · answered by i_left_my_mind_with_the_baby 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its his age....my daughter did it too. I stopped it real quick by putting a very small dab of tobasco on my kids tounge everytime she said it. I explained to her that hate is a very bad word and I told her that everytime she said it she was geting a dab. It was also helpful to explain to her the other words that express anger that arent so bad. Like I am mad at you or I am angry.
2006-07-24 18:22:43 · answer #6 · answered by Lisa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My auntie taught me hate is a swearword. I still don't use that word. Treat these words like you would any swearword. Use the same disipline you do for anything else.
2006-07-24 18:21:22 · answer #7 · answered by tonya_momma 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him it's ok to say "I'm mad at you." In other words, give him a choice. He is associating the word "hate" w/ "mad." Let him know it is his right and that it is ok to be mad as if you are talking to an adult. However, tell him it's not ok to say "hate" and give him a choice.
2006-07-24 18:25:53 · answer #8 · answered by emplifeon 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ignore him when he makes these statements. He notices that he gets a rise out of you when he says this. Ignore him and he will have to find another way to get your attention.
2006-07-24 18:21:22 · answer #9 · answered by Mike S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not react, stay calm and tell him that you do not use that language, it is not polite. I told my son that maybe half a dozen times and it worked. Good luck.
2006-07-24 18:46:02 · answer #10 · answered by PLDFK 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋