My boyfriend and I are really serious and are in love, have talked about moving in together in a few years (we're in our late teens) and even getting married. However, our anniversery passed a week ago and I didn't hear from him all day (we had discussed the anniversery a few days before, so it's not like he didn't know), and when he did finally call and I told him how upset I was that he'd been out of contact (we met at college and live in separate states although we've seen each other a few times already this summer) and that I hadn't heard from him at all on our anniversery. He apologized, said that he wouldn't do it again, but now I haven't heard from him in a few days when we used to talk every day. I want to feel loved, but feel like there's no room for me in his life. I have no doubts about his feelings for me, but feel like he's too self involved to be able to devote his attention to anyone else. What can I do? Am I being unreasonable?
2006-07-24 07:53:12 · 11 answers · asked by Engineered 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
you are being insecure.
remember, anniversaries are just a day on a calendar, most men forget them. And don't you want your man to have friends and a life and other things to do besides sitting by the phone pining for you? If you don't, then you are also being selfish.
Long distance relationships are hard., and you need to work even harder to make them work. Set up "phone dates" where you set aside time to talk, so you know you two are spending time together.
2006-07-24 08:02:38 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, you are not being unreasonable. Wanting contact, even if it is just a phone call, is a perfectly reasonable human desire. Sometimes, when things get slow and boring, and you do not hear from the one you love for some time, it definitely seems like there is no time, and doubts can, in fact, begin to enter your mind. Next time he calls, talk with him; tell him how you are feeling. See what he says. Do not push him away by becoming argumentative or defensive, rather say something gentle and sweet that conveys your message. The biggest thing is to remain open and honest with him about your feelings, and let him do the same. Stay open minded and things should pan out in the end.
2006-07-24 08:06:29 · answer #2 · answered by pilotmanitalia 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
High maintenance has a bad name it seems. This only really plays up when one or the other side thinks they don't get as much as they want. When that happens find out if it really makes you happy to live in each other's lap so to speak. Just keep in mind that you stand better together if you know how to stand on your own and you can even trade the stand in here for stay.
As for men forgetting important dates, yea that happens a lot. Worry not, they generally don't forget the person who is all that important in the first place, just the time frame. And yes they also need some time to hang with other men simply to do men things. Learn to live with that.
Back to high maintenance, learn to be as much as he can take. And figure for yourself to have other things to do when you don't have him around.
2006-07-24 08:19:31 · answer #3 · answered by groovusy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, several things could be a factor in him not contacting you.
one, he may be too busy with family and friends. he might be enjoying not having you around to nag him all the time.
two, he could be busy with summer school projects. have you asked him??
three, he could be cheating on you.
since you live in seperate states the last one will be hard to determine true or not but you should ask him if he has met anyone else or not and ask him to be honest with you so as to avoid a long drawn out break up and heart ache.
good luck to you.
2006-07-24 07:59:36 · answer #4 · answered by ziggunerin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Emotionally-- particularly severe upkeep, i want general affirmations, i'm getting my feeling harm actually and so on yet bodily- very low upkeep. i will get waiting in a couple of minutes. i think of i glance very valuable, in spite of the incontrovertible fact that it would not take lots for me to look like this. and that i'm low upkeep in different procedures-- i don't assume an anniversary present. I have no subject with my husband going out a pair situations of week with the lads and so on.
2016-11-02 21:58:58 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey! Its okay. Just give him some space. Its hard but give him a week or so. If its meant to work out it will, but if not, things will come to light. It sucks being women, we worry about this stuff all the time, but just relax. Your anwser lies in your patience.
2006-07-24 07:58:33 · answer #6 · answered by Raquel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a little bit but if you guys life far away from each other then it may be hard for him to stay in touch sometimes.
2006-07-24 07:57:26 · answer #7 · answered by Andi 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what do you want to do? dont break up wit him he loves you and you love him just make sure you call him every day and if he dosent answer leave a messege......dont give up you will be sorry if you do
2006-07-24 07:59:18 · answer #8 · answered by froggy_luvrrr 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are feeling fine. It is your choice if you want to give him some space, or confrount him about it. Each has its pros and cons.
2006-07-24 07:56:04 · answer #9 · answered by Sarah 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes.
2006-07-24 08:04:10 · answer #10 · answered by Tyler Durdin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋