What is so wrong with spanking a child? Please give your opinion (politely).?

Question

I feel that this is the reason the children this day in time are so unruly and disrespectful. No I do not agree with beating a child, but a firm hand, and determined parent produce a well behaved child.

Answer 1

My parents spanked me, and it didn't scar me for life. If anything, I turned out better for it, knowing that to this day my dad will NOT hesitate to bend me over his knee and whoup my as.s if I do something so out of line that he would actually spank me. Guess what, he hasn't had to spank me in years. Why? Because I knew that I did something awful enough to warrent it, and I never did it again. And people who say it raises the child to think hitting people is acceptable is bullcrap. If it raises the child to think hitting is acceptable, it was abuse to begin with and the parent has failed in their duty to be a parent. I understand the difference between simply acting out and hitting someone and discipline. I did then, and I do now.

The key is to only use it as a last measure, and to not use it while they're too young to understand why they're being spanked. Say your 8 year old gets sent home for stealing from another kid. That deserves a spanking. They're old enough to know that stealing is wrong. An F on a report card, however, does not deserve a spanking, because clearly there's another issue that in and of itself does not merit such punishment.

Folks, welcome to the real world. When done appropriatly and for the appropriate reasons, a spanking goes a long way. It's when it gets out of hand that it's not acceptable.

I definitly agree with the statement that if you're too much of a coward to spank your kid, you're going to be picking them up from jail or picking your own *** up off the floor when they knock you out. My cousin is an excellent drug addicted example with a criminal record a mile long of what goes wrong with Dr. Spock's child raising when you don't spank them when necessary. But wait, there's more! My other cousin was raised with spankings and she's a wonderful mother of two? Maybe three now? children with a loving husband.

Answer 2

Depends on your definition of spanking. For some people its a light swat dealt as punishment only when other options have been exhausted. For others its a beating with an object like a belt or paddle. The first example, used sparingly, is not generally painful, gets the child's attention, and is very effective. The second is the equivalent of child abuse.

Also, you have to be very specific, and very careful, when you apply any physical punishment. NEVER approach punishment from a position of anger - you'll always over do it. The punishment should fit the crime.

For example:

Your child had a cup of juice. You put a lid on it for her so that she wouldn't spill, and told her not to remove the lid.

Scenarios:

1) She took the lid off, then spilled juice on the carpet. She spilled it by accident. But she spilled it because she disobeyed you. Appropriate punishment: Take away the juice, after reminding her what you stated previously. Return cup to her with lid replaced, and remind her again not to remove it.

2) She took the lid off the and poured the juice out onto the floor in a specific pattern, then pulled down all the cushions off the couch to cover it up. Appropriate punishment: Take away the juice, and time out for disobedience and blatant wrongdoing.

3) She removes the lid once, and you punish her as stated in scenario 1). Several minutes later, she removes the lid again. You warn her, after replacing the lid a second time, that she will get a spanking if she does it again. She waits for you to leave, removes the lid, and again spills the juice. Appropriate punishment: Take away the juice, give a single light "pop" on the behind with the bare hand, and then follow up with time out.

In my lifetime, I've been the recipient of both spanking and beating. I survived it all, and am a well-rounded adult with my own child. When I say "spanking," I mean a light pop with my bare hand on the behind. It is a final consequence, after other methods have been exhausted, to remind my child that there are limits to the sort of behavior that will be tolerated, and help teach her proper boundaries. This may not work for some, but it has worked for us so far.

However, anything more severe than what I defined moves into the realm of child abuse, and should never be applied.

Answer 3

I believe there is a line between spanking your child and abusing your child. I am 100% for spanking, I believe it teaches discipline and is a very effective way to enforcing rules. However, I dont believe one should spank a child in public, as it just fuels a kids fire because people are watching. It should be done in the home. I was spanked as a child and spank my children when needed, but not all the time. It is not abuse. It is only considered abuse when you beat the kid till there is no end, without a good sufficient reason.

Answer 4

I don't see anything wrong with spanking a child. My parents spanked me when I was little and I turned out okay. I'm not mentally scarred or any thing.
I think the key is to:
1. wait until you are calm before spanking,
2. to make sure the child understands that the spanking is the consequence for a wrong action, and
3. to be sure not to be too rough.
If you leave red marks that's too hard/much.

Answer 5

Spanking, in my book, is child abuse. I was spanked as a child. Sometimes, while spanking, it gets out of hand. It's not just one good whack on the backside. It gets repetitive or the belt comes out! What does this solve other than permanent fear of the child's parents or anyone else that looks just like them? It, too, does nothing to make a child's self-worth soar.

Children learn what they live. Raise them right and give them a good example and you won't feel the need to spank!

Answer 6

There is nothing wrong per se with spanking a child....however, it is just like anything else. If you do it excessively, then it is a problem.

I spank my child when her behavior it totally unacceptable (she is 8 and I am 45). I will later come up to her and apologize to her for spanking her and explain to her why I did that. She will then apologize to me for her behavior, because she knows that when I do resort to spanking, she has gone too far.

Most people hit their kids for no good reason. So "corporal punishment" has gotten a bad rap. Then people complain about the kids today. When I was a kid, I never acted rude around adults because I was afraid of the consequences.

Today, kids don't worry about consequences, because they know that they can complain to a teacher, etc...and then the authorities will be after the parents.

Answer 7

http://www.parenting.com/parenting/article/0,19840,1215279,00.html
ok this is a pretty good article i don't agree with everything in it but maybe it will help. I think that you are absolutely right about more parents needing to spank there children. My mom and dad would spank my and my 2 sisters and we are doing great...none of us are violent or have been into any trouble. I think that the punishment has to fit the crime though. Spanking is not always the answer...if what was done only deserves a talking to then that will do fine...but i don't think parents should be afraid to spank as long as it isn't abuse.

Answer 8

Spanking a child is a good way of enforcing rules between a parent and child. You just have to be careful that your not crossing the line between discipline and abuse. How else would you suggest disciplining a child? I was spanked when I was a child, I was not hurt for my life because of it. It helped to raise and to be respectful of my parents. When I have children I plan to use spanking for discipline. I love my parents very much and do not hold anything against them for spanking me. I agree with what they did.

Answer 9

I feel that all's it teaches a child is to be afraid of their parents, even in case where the child is being beaten. It also doesn't make sense to teach a child that hitting someone is a good punishment. If a child does something to them in school we do not teach our children to hit them. I think that all's it really does it make the parents feel better. I know when I get mad at my daughter I feel like giving her a little swat on her butt, but that's about me feeling better, not teaching her right from wrong. Of couse there should be consequences for a child's actions, but I just dont think spanking should be one of them. It's just too easy to go overboard and cross the line with it, especially if you are mad/upset. Studies have shown that spanking isn't effective. In fact they find that children who have been spanked have a tendency to be more anxious and more aggressive. I just dont see the point of it.

Answer 10

In my opinion, there is nothing wrong with it.
When I was younger and got in trouble, I got a good spanking and it taught me never to do the wrong thing again. These days kids get away with too much and there is no good way of disciplining them. I don't believe in beating a child, but a time out chair doesn't work either. A good smack on the bottom sets them straight.