Please i need some advice...?

Question

I am 15 and I have just had another argument/fight with my mom. It started when she chucked my favourite cup in the bin, sounds pathetic but i chukcked the bin lid at her (i do have a very very short temper)so that got me wound up real bad. She come over and punched me and my head up against the door she did this two times really hard. For once i havent cried but i have a real headache. She stopped hitting my head against the door and was shouting "Call the police on me..I hate you, get out of my house"!
I dont know what to do.
Please Help!!!!

Answer 1

Okay, I think it is necessary to involve the police or child protective services. You are being abused and as a result (it must have been going on for awhile) you are fighting back and it is resulting in more abuse. Get help now.

Answer 2

Ok... there is a real issue here... what did you do to get that cup chucked... and sounds like you both have a short temper. And when you as a minor reacted the way you did in disrespect she lost her temper. There is obviously something that has triggered all of this between the 2 of you. Was it right for her to repeatably bang your head against the door no. Something obviously pushed her to her limits. It is a concern that she lost her temper.... you both seem to need some type of professional counsling.... One question are you being a rebelious teenager? Cause most moms dont loose there temper like that unless they cant take any more.. coming from a family with a physco mom! I did what ever I wanted and when she had enough and couldnt handle it anymore she knocked me out....lol not literally but close enough. I catch my self freaking out with my son now.. so she could just need some extra support and love from you or something? Who knows but something is going on. Good Luck

Answer 3

Your mother's behaviour is completely inappropriate and I imagine she is suffering from some sort of depression or mental illness. First of all, know that none of this is your fault. Your reaction to her throwing your favorite cup away is just you imitating her. It's not that you have a short-temper; it's that you've been taught to have a short temper. Children learn from their parents -and this is probably behaviour you've learned over the years from your own mother. Make yourself a promise today that you will never, never again behave like your mother. Ever. You are the only person who can stop this terrible cycle. Second, get out the yellow pages (or surf the net) and look to see if there is a teen center or family crises center nearby. You need and deserve to find help. It doesn't mean you have to leave your home, but it's best that you find a place where you can feel safe and have other people who understand. Third, it is very, very important that you focus on a career path and really concentrate on your education. You ARE a worthwhile person... and we need good people out here in this world. So set up a goal, and don't let it go. Take care of yourself, ok?

Answer 4

Well, here is another case of child AND mother abuse. Now please hear me out on this one, before you scroll on... I am going to speak to you very frank and tell you the truth, when all anyone is going to tell you, is "call protective services." I am sure you had already thought about that, and still you haven't and you are here. So I think that sence there is something preventing you from doing it, that their answers are not helping.

I was once in a situation much like this one. And now, as an adult, I see things a little differently than I did then. I knew that I COULD call protective services then, but lets face it... when a parent is visited by these people, all they have to do is look nice, and you are left in the home to fend off an IRATE parent. (This is one of the things wrong with the world today...) I am not telling you this to prevent you from calling, because if it gets worse, YOU MUST do what you have to do to keep yourself safe.

You see I was a terrible teen. I would push the buck, just to see what happened. I knew what I did was wrong... but I was at a point where I just didn't care. I guess i just didn't feel I was worth it and that it didn't even matter.

You stated you have a very bad temper hun, and maybe that is where you need to start. It also sounds to me like your mom needs help as well. Here's what I propose, (since if I could do things differently this is what I would do...) I assume, since you didn't call the authorities, that one of two things is happening. I assume you either love your mother, and wish things would change, OR you are afraid of her. Since you chucked the lid at her, I am guessing you are not afraid of her, so I am going to just think you love her. I think what you need to do, is go to your mother, (and I know this is VERY hard!) and explain to her that you love her very much. Then try to talk to her about your feelings about the way things are going. Tell her it hurts your feelings when she does things like this. Ask her if there is some way the two of you could go to anger management AS A TEAM. Since there seems to be some underlying issues not mentioned... I think maybe counsiling may be necessary as well. What you are doing to each other is painful to both of you, and to try to get over all of this, at least try this before you feel you have no other choice but to alert the authorities. I know it is sad, but maybe someone here needs to be the adult, and who better to start it than you? If it doesn't help, then you can walk away know it was YOU who tried, and that the problem doesn't lie in you anymore.

Good luck, hun, and I hope this helps!

Answer 5

You should not have thrown the lid.

My mother had hit me once or twice and I did swing back but missed. I was about 15 or so.

I don't recommend going anywhere. You do not want to be on the streets. Youth homes are not the answer. You have no skills and no money. You have no other options. You have 3 more years, or maybe 2.5 to deal with her. Just stay put, but defend yourself if you have to.

1. Get a job 2. save your money 3. Make a plan to leave.

Leave the right way so you won't have to come back begging because you didn't plan ahead.

Good luck

Answer 6

okay. do u have a close family member who you can trust to come pick u up from where you are?
if so, call them and sound as desperate as you can so that they can come get you.
explain to them what's going. see what they do. hopefully they're smart enouigh to go and talk to your mother but you really shouldn't have thrown the lid. pray before you do any of this. God is letting all of this happen to you for a reason. ask him why and for an answer that will be easy for you to identify. do not run away alone because you'll just be heading to more trouble. if u feel as though your life is on the line, don't fight back but get the phone and call someone for help.

Answer 7

Sounds like u and ur mom have anger problems... getting the police involved is no need... yall dont need to let this 1 situation break up the family... all foster homes arent safe and u both will regret the outcome involving the police... look at it like this u both acted out of anger... maybe u both should seek some proffessional help... goodluck and God bless....

Answer 8

You need a better relationship with your mom, both of you need anger management and need to get better through therapy. It seems like you get your temper from your mom and it's not healthy.

Please go and have a sitdown with her, and don't do things that can spark her anger. You need better communication or in the end, both of you will hate each other. Also, if she hurts you for no reason you need to call the police. I think in this case, you did provoke her, but your mom hurting you wasn't excusable either. Both of you need help. NOW.

Answer 9

Ummm...this is NOT abuse. You lost your temper and threw a BIN at your MOTHER. If I was in your situation, I would be lucky if I was alive to even pose such a question. It sounds like maybe you and your mother should seek some family counseling and maybe you should seek some anger management to help you better deal with situations when you feel out of control.

Answer 10

Look, that's a serious abuse, you should tell someone, a grown up, or someone from your family.
You have to understand that it's really bad, and you must do something about it. Don't be afraid of your mother's reaction, the most important thing is that you will be safe.