WiseVibes Joke #8?

Question

An elderly Jewish gentleman marries a much younger woman. No matter what the husband does sexually, the woman never achieves orgasm. Since a Jewish wife is entitled to sexual pleasure, they decide to talk to the rabbi.

The rabbi listens to their story, strokes his beard, and makes the following suggestion. “Hire a handsome young man, and have him wave a towel over you while you are making love. This will help your wife fantasize and should bring on an orgasm.

The couple goes home and follows the rabbi’s advice. They hire a handsome young man and he waves a towel over them while they make love. It doesn’t help and she is still unsatisfied. Perplexed they go back to the rabbi.

“Okay,” says the rabbi to the husband. “Let’s try it reversed. Have the young man make love to your wife and you wave the towel.”

Once again they follow the rabbi’s advice. The young man gets into bed with the wife and the husband waves the towel. The young man gets working with great enthusiasm and the wife soon has an enormous, room-shaking, ear-splitting orgasm.

The husband smiles, looks at the young man and says to him triumphantly, “You see, you young schmuck? THAT’S how you wave a towel!”

I got this joke from a very close Jewish friend. We both thought it was funny. It's just a joke and not to be taken seriously. Lighten up.

Hey, majickalice, verry goood! You're stealing my thunder.

Answer 1

That is AWESOME! Here is one for you:

Three couples have decided to convert to catholism and they all speak to a priest. After following all the necessary protocol the priest decides to test thier faith. He says to all of the couples that he wants them to go 1 full month without fornication to prove to the Lord that they are strong - they all agree to come back in a month...

The oldest couple are elderly and have been married for 30 years. When the priest asks about thier undertaking they tell him:
"We have been together for years, and when you get to be our age it is more about the emotional than the physical, I saw her undressing the other day and the thought occured to me - but I wouldn't have had the energy anyway... the month flew by." And with that they are accepted into the faith.

The middle age couple has been married for 15 years. When the priest asks about thier undertaking they tell him:
"Well to be honest, it was difficult at first, but we really focused and let the time slip by. We almost failed, I saw her getting out of the shower and could barely control myself - but held strong to our faith and were able to remain abstinent." And with that they are accepted into the faith.

The yongest couple, recently married walks up to the priestw ith thier heads lowered. When the priest asks about thier undertaking they tell him:
"We are sorry father - we tried to be strong but I saw her standing in front of the fridge... she looked *um* cold... and she had this tiny little skirt on and I had the have her - I bent her over right there!"

The priest replies: "Thank You for your honesty, but unfortunately we can not allow you into our faith after that episode..."

The young man replies: "That's okay - were not allowed in Stop And Shop anymore either..."

Answer 2

haha...

here's one more:
Morris and his wife Esther went to the state fair every year, and every year Morris would say, "Esther, I 'd like to ride in that helicopter".
Esther always replied, "I know Morris, but that helicopter ride is fifty dollars -- and fifty dollars is fifty dollars".

One year Esther and Morris went to the fair, and Morris said, "Esther, I'm 85 years old. If I don't ride that helicopter, I might never get another chance."


Esther replied, "Morris that helicopter is fifty dollars -- and fifty dollars is fifty dollars".

The pilot overheard the couple and said, "Folks I'll make you a deal. I'll take the both of you for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and not say a word I won't charge you! But if you say one word, it's fifty dollars."

Morris and Esther agreed and up they went. The pilot did all kinds of fancy maneuvers, but not a word was heard. He did his daredevil tricks over and over again, but still not a word. When they landed, the pilot turned to Morris and said, "By golly, I did everything I could to get you to yell out, but you didn't. I'm impressed!"

Morris replied, "Well, to tell you the truth, I almost said something when Esther fell out, but you know -- fifty dollars is fifty dollars."

Answer 3

A skeleton walks in to a bar. He says, "Gimme a lager, and a mop." what's 15 inches long, and hangs in front of a jerk? Donald Trump's necktie How does "The Creature's relatives take a relatives portrait.? all of them jam into the front seat and run a pink mild. guy: "have been you faking it final evening?" lady: "No, i exchange into incredibly drowsing." previous guy: "checklist, i won't be in a position of bypass pee." well-known practitioner, "How previous are you?" previous guy, "ninety six." well-known practitioner, "you have peed sufficient." 2 Seagulls fly over the Kentucky Derby. One says to the different, "i'm gonna placed everythingg I have been given on variety 7." what's furry and stands proud of a mans pajamas at evening? His head. a guy robs a financial company and takes hostages. He says to the 1st hostage, "did you spot what occurred," the hostage mentioned, "sure." The robber shot him. Then the robber mentioned to the subsequent hostage, "did you spot what occurred?" the subsequent hostage mentioned, "No, yet my spouse did."

Answer 4

right on jewish man you tell those young knicker boppers

Answer 5

LOL.LOL.

LOL. To Majick Alice, also. Thank you both.

Answer 6

that some good towel wavein'

Answer 7

Thanks for sharing this hilarious joke. I plan on sharing it with my rabbi.

Answer 8

lol
terrible!
lol

Answer 9

oh my god very funny. did you make this up? very talented!

Answer 10

this joke sucks