I have been dating an ex-school friend for about two months. She left her husband and was in the process of getting a divorce. I knew it was wrong but he had sex a few times. The second month into our relationship she told me she was pregnant. Which was cool becuase I have no kids. A few weeks later she told me she lost the kid then she dumped me. I found out later that she moved back to her abusive husband. I was surprised. I just recently found out that she is pregnant. The child could be mine. The problem is she started using drugs again, she quit her job and they have moved. Should I find her and confront her about it? If I do, I know she will take off. Or should I wait until she has the kid then confront her about it? I would also ask for a blood test to make sure the child is mine. I am confused on what I should do.
2006-07-24 06:02:28 · 12 answers · asked by RedCloud_1998 6 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
Yes, I do have contact with her family. I have known them for a long time. They were surprised after what she did. Her sister expressed concerned for the child. They are hoping it is mine because I would make the better parent. If it is mine there is nothing I wouldn't do to get full custody.
2006-07-24 06:37:25 · update #1
The best thing would be for you to get a paternity test first and see if the child is yours. Then you have every right to take her to court and take the child away from her. If the child isn't yours, convince the parents to take her to court to get the baby away from her. No child should be raised in a home that has drugs and abuse. Good luck and I hope the baby is yours.
2006-07-25 04:39:21 · answer #1 · answered by brandiwhine 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should call a lawyer and ask what can you do right now and see what they tell you and if you have to wait until the baby is born then get a lawyer and do everything you can do. You said she when back to her husband does he know anything about you? If he doesn't maybe you should try to make him find out so he can doubt that the baby is his then she will have to get a test. But be on the safe side and call a lawyer and see what and if you can do anything before the baby is born cause there has to be something you can do. Good luck and best wishes
2006-07-24 15:26:36 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep tabs on her until the baby is born. If you have contact with her relatives let them know that you want to do the right thing (maybe they will let you know when the baby is born). After the child is born have a paternity test. If it's yours and she's doing drugs petition for full custody. If it's not yours get down on your knees and that God (or your higher power) that he saved you from a hard road ahead.
Take this time to evaluate why you allowed yourself to get involved with someone messed up like her. Life is hard enough trying to keep yourself on track -- don't put extra burdens in your path that you know you can't fix.
Good luck!
2006-07-24 13:11:09 · answer #3 · answered by Starr 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree you need a lawyer or the help of human services. Perhaps she fears for her or the babys safety. That is a hard situation. you need to find her and ask her if the baby is yours and tell her you want a blood test to prove it. Tell her that you want the chance to take care of her and the baby if need be and to be a father. I would also tell her that if the baby is yours you want to be apart of its life. Good luck with this situation...Please don't just forget about her or the baby..
2006-07-24 13:13:40 · answer #4 · answered by *bossy* 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
man you can get a court order for a test to see if your the daddy.... but that will be after the birth... all you got to do is explain all of this to a judge or some one that works in law and have them help you out... just because you don't know where she is any more you can tell these ppl her 1st and last name date of birth and go from there the have computers they will find her...
2006-07-27 23:11:29 · answer #5 · answered by monicalee 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just wait to she have the baby and get a dna test on it to find if it is yours and if it is yours then get a lawyer and fight to it from her , if she is still using drugs , i just hope when she have the baby that it is ok , because my cousin just had adopation a baby that his mother was using drugs while she was pregnant and now the baby is 2 mths old might have to have a surgey because his soft spot have closed up
2006-07-24 13:27:57 · answer #6 · answered by angel h 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you wnat to be a part of the child's life you need to see a lawyer asap, even if the child isn't due until much later.
2006-07-24 13:06:43 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be glad she's gone. If she's using drugs...were needles involved??? AND who else, if anyone was she having sex with? You could have been exposed to anything. Have yourself tested!!!
Don't get into that tangled web she's spun. For all you know, the baby she's carrying could be someone else's.
2006-07-24 19:29:08 · answer #8 · answered by orangefrostie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you'll need a lawyer. and welfare may have to get involved. some areas have legal aid for people that can't afford a lawyer. don't abandon the child, it deserves a good life, and didn't ask to be born. good luck.
2006-07-24 13:21:00 · answer #9 · answered by alienmiss 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YES!!! Find her. If she doing drugs then you should. The child could get very hurt. Thatsnot cool. Do the right thing.
2006-07-24 13:36:26 · answer #10 · answered by sexy bee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋