First of all, I'm 21 and we've been together for 4 years now. My mom is going to Florida on vacation to visit my brother, his wife and their kid. (We live in NC) She invited me to go too. She's gonna be down there for 9 to 11 days and they're all gonna go to visit some monuments and beaches and maybe Disney World or a theme park. There are 2 problems though. My mom and I are so different that we don't get along too good so I'm not sure if I can put up with her for that long lol. And also, my boyfriend won't be able to go because he'll be working and just plan doesn't want to go. Sure I'll miss him, but I don't know when I'll get the chance to go to FL again (I've never been). He gets kinda jealous sometimes though and I'm not sure how he'd feel if I went to FL without him for a week. And if he's gonna be pissy about it, I'd just rather not go. Do you think I should suck up the problems with me and my mom and also my boyfriend, and just go? Or forget about it and stay?
2006-07-24 05:45:21 · 28 answers · asked by Jenn 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
OH CRAP! I forgot to mention that during our four year relationship he's gone to South Dakota for two weeks twice and to Germany for three weeks, both times without me. Um...yeah...I think I know what I should do now! lol ;) He'll be fine. I had to deal with him being gone for even longer than I'll be gone.
2006-07-24 05:57:07 · update #1
Ok, as a native Floridian, I'm telling you, you've gotta come see Florida. It's a wonderful place and despite it getting crowded over the years, and all the hurricanes, I can't bring myself to leave. Where else can you drive in almost any direction and hit beach or drive to a bunch of theme parks? Honestly, you're going to have a blast! You don't have to be tethered to your mom the entire time. You're 21, and you're an adult. And if you stay on Disney property, oh are you in for a treat! They have shuttles that take you EVERYWHERE. Trust me, it is SO much fun, and at 21, you can drink, drink, drink!
Don't let your boyfriend's pouting stand in your way. It sounds like he's jealous because of having to work. Why sit at home and cater to his temper tantrum? I bet if the tables were turned, he'd be on that plane to Florida without you, so go ahead and go without him. 21 is too young to let any man control your life. You need to think about why you'd be willing to sit out an amazing opportunity so he won't sulk at home. What about what YOU want? Go to Florida...you won't regret it but you will regret missing this trip for a guy who doesn't seem to have your best interests at heart. Enjoy the trip!
2006-07-24 05:51:52 · answer #1 · answered by SuperJenn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
go! go trust him that he will be good! go visit your only family you have on earth! go be where you want to be! go take the good opportunity! go have a quality time! Go discover new things! go learn what is missing in your family, relationship and life! go ahead! move to the next step! it is not where you start but where you finish that counts! if he disagrees strongly, he does not respect your free choice! he should let you go if he really loves you! love says: you, lust says:me, love gives, lust takes! his reaction will be a termometer to show you clearly the temperature of his heart and his treating you less than the best will prove you once again who he really is. jelousy is like a poison that kills inside the person who chooses to have it! do not be afraid of his reaction, be convinced of your action. if he does not love and respect your own family, how mush you can really expect he to love you as a person born and rased up in the same family?test the ground of your relationship and who he really is. if he does not allow you to have space, give him no space and think about the quality of this relationship. god made you free! if you are not free in the realtionship, something is wrong, because somebody limits (-ed) you. see also how you felt and how he felt later when you come back. what he and what you did in the meantime. the Bible says in 1 cor. 13 that love is patient. is his love like that? if not, most probably it is not a real love!!! do not allow anybody to tell you that he has more rights and freedoms than you! both of you have equal freedom of chioce and respect means that you accept the choice of the other. if he doesn't that shows you his level of respect and love. go and see his and yours reaction! be with your family! have quality time, wise chioses and do not be afread, do not be shaky! made up your mind and do what you think is the right in the situation. if you have to shoose between 2 evils, always take the less evil one. go and may god bless you! love and hug your family! show them you care and apreciate the people in which home you were born. i have no father! some have no parents. always think what will be wiser from the furute point of view. dalay gratification! small compromise leads to great consequences!be wise, be strong, be faithful, be corageous! do only hte best you can do regardless the price you pay now! later all your life you will remember and be proud of yourself! of what you did, of yout you saw! be an original, do not dare to act like a copy! do the right thing and let God help you on the way ahead! do it in such a way that when you are 71 to remember and talk about what you did when you were 21!
2006-07-25 07:58:15 · answer #2 · answered by stefan s 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, Florida is beautiful. Second of all, I think it is a great opportunity for you to get to see new places. If your boyfriend gets jealous, then he will just have to be jealous for one whole week. I say if you stay just because he's mad about you going, then I think he's making you miss out on lots of fun. Really, he is the one who doesn't want to go, so why should you have to stay because he wants to stay home? He has the chance to go and be with you so what is his problem? Maybe being away for a week could actually show you where you are in your relationship and how it is going. You just need to stop worrying about what he or she says or does and enjoy yourself. Go see your brother and relax.
2006-07-24 05:58:07 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
These types of situations come up throughout our lives. Even when you will be married, you husband might need to go on a business trip for a week. Sometimes being without your significant other for a while will bring you two closer together.
Go visit your brother, your bf will get over it, if he doesn't then that might mean that he doesn't trust you, then you have bigger problems than just going on vacation for a week.
Have a good time.
2006-07-24 05:53:54 · answer #4 · answered by handydaddy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I say go to Florida. If you have never been there, this is a great chance. I know all about the mom issues. Don't focus on those. You never know, you could have a breakthrough while you are gone.
As for your boyfriend, he needs to get over it. It's not your fault that he has to work. If he gets mad over you going away for a week, then there are some problems. You need to have time away from each other sometimes.
I wouldn't give up the chance to travel over a guy:)
2006-07-24 05:51:04 · answer #5 · answered by agentm006 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie ur just 21 and U will find another love. Ur mom will be ur mom forever. suck it up and try to make it a good and memorable family trip. And u and this guy is not married so U should have not even asked him to go especially since he made u feel bad anyway saying he just plain ole don't want to go. When U return he will miss U and things will go back the same. Good Luck!
2006-07-24 05:58:17 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he can't be without you for a week (or would get even a tiny bit pissy), there is a HUGE problem. He needs to respect that you have your life and family to visit.
Serious signal of a potentially fatal relationship flaw. You do not exist to serve or entertain him at his leisure--with your vacation plans allowing him any excuse for anything other than supportive behavior.
Wasn't it Ann Landers that said no one can take advantage of you unless you allow it? Applies to both mom and bf.
2006-07-24 05:53:16 · answer #7 · answered by Love2Sew 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are 21...you can go to Florida without your boyfreind, there is no law that says he has to go besides he has to work....You are going to visit family which is not something you can do everyday right..So try and get along with your mom during the vacation...and tell your boyfreind that you will miss him...if he gets pissy about it , Oh well he will get over it....Enjoy Florida Its beautiful there
2006-07-24 05:52:12 · answer #8 · answered by Mrs. M 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
naw dont forget about the problem i think it is a great idea that u r going wit ur mom at least u guys can try to spend time with eachother. u got to talk to ur boyfriend about it and show him that u love him and no matter where u r ur still going to think about him and u will still talk 2 eachother. let him no how much that trip means to u becuz u miss ur bro and also let him no how much he means 2 u. explain 2 him then ask him if he will b cool wit u going if not then just stay becuz trust me arguments suck, i should no. this happened wit me once too and my boyfriend let me go finally. good luck and if u go have lots of fun.
2006-07-24 05:50:54 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Neither your mom nor your bf own you and can patronize you as they please. You are free, so live up to this standard, go visit FL and Disney World after your mom's return and dump your bf who's a worthless and jealous person and do what you like. It's your life and you only live once.
2006-07-24 05:53:49 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋