should i wait?

Question

i have not made love to a man in more then 3 years because i started to go to chruch again, but i meet a man he is not chrisitian and he wantes to go out with me but i am scared that something might happen, we are human begins, what should i do, i dont want to disrespect God, and i dont want the guy to fell bad, not meaning that i am going to sleep with him. dont know what to say , he ask me last night on the phone if i would wait to getting marryed or before.. and i told him that i would answer today.

Answer 1

If sex is the main reason that his guy will either have a relationship with you or not, then you should get away from him.

Relationships need to have a foundation of respect and love. Without it they are exercises in stupidity that are doomed to fail.

I have been a man for 60 years now. Some men are serious about their relationships. Others are more like prospective car buyers. They are mostly interested in taking a test drive. This is juvenile thinking of course but its how they think. If you are interested in raising an adolescent male then go out with men with this attitude.

If you want a real relationship with an adult male then avoid these test drivers. They only want to kick your emotional tires a few times and then they are gone, Off to look at the latest model. Do your self a favor and find someone who loves and respects you first. The other stuff will be a lot nicer with that type of person anyway.

Love and blessings.

Answer 2

First piece of advice -- ignore Kjelstad's advice.

Second piece of advice -- remember that pleasing God is far more important and necessary than pleasing people.

If I were you, I'd tell the man that I want to wait to get married before having sex again. He may say that it's OK with him, or he may not. Either way, you'll be staying true to your beliefs -- which is never a bad thing at all.

I was sexually active until becoming a devout Catholic about four years ago. It was at that time that I decided that the next man I had sex with would be my husband.

It's the best decision I've ever made, and now I'm engaged to be married in November. When November comes, I plan on "doing it all" -- but until then, I'm doing what I think is the right thing.

Answer 3

Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? and what communion has light with darkness? 2 Corinthians 6:14

This tell us that Believers and Non-Believers should not be involved with each other. The reason behind this is because if a believer and non-believer get involved with each other then the temptation for the believer to follow the non-believer is going to be so great that the believer may slip. Us as believers should keep ourselves out of the position where temptation can conquer us, and I'm sorry just by what you have told us I believe if you get involved with this man, no matter your strength, you will give into temptation and you will regret it.

So the best advice I can give you is to leave this guy alone. Because no one person is worth turning your back on God.

Answer 4

You mentioned that you didn't want to let God down, so why are you even considering sleeping with this person? Its sounds as if you have decided to turn life around, and you have made efforts for 3 years to keep yourself for your husband. I have been celibate for 2 years now. Come this Thursday, I would have dated a guy for 1 year without any sex whatsoever. God has called us to the ministry and we have a things that we have to do for God. Its not easy, but I promise you, remain obedient. You may not be able to see your reward because it is SO great. Remain celibate. That's my opinion.

Answer 5

If he really loves you, he will respect both you and your faith. Having sex with a person, according to God's will, is supposed to be the utmost expression of love between two people -- but only between a husband and wife, because marriage is the sacrament in which you include God into your relationship. Marriage is the final statement where you commit to each other -- for the sake of absolute certainty of your partner's dedication, for the sake of your God, for the sake of your morality, and self-respect, don't have sex with this man until you are married. If he does love you, not having sex before marriage won't deter him from you! Your heart should be his goal -- not your body.

Answer 6

Don't marry someone just because you don't want to sleep with them before being married! Too many bad marriages have started that way already.

The Creator won't be offended as long as you respect yourself and others. Even the Bible says that god wants mercy, not sacrifice.

Answer 7

Sounds like you already know what you want. It is good you want to respect God. About this guy.....you don't want to hurt him. I can understand that but if you want a serious relationship it would be best for you to date another person of your faith. There are so many problems that arise if you and your someone special have contradicting values. I haven't heard anyone who waited say 'I wish I hadn't' ......but you know that isn't true the other way around. Best of luck with what ever you decide for your relationships.

Answer 8

"i have not made love to a man in more then 3 years because i started to go to chruch again"

ha, the feeble minds.

Answer 9

Honestly? Do what you feel is right. I'd pray and consult the bible.

In the end, who're you worried about disrespecting more? God or this guy? If you feel it's a sin, you'll end up disapointing yourself, also.

If you're not sure, I'd wait. Don't do it unless you're positive it's what you want and right.

Answer 10

You should wait...if he loves you he will understand....if not then he doesnt love you...in that case you shouldnt go all the way because he doesnt love you....do you get what i am saying?? Who do you love more?? This guy or God?? Who would you rather upset??? Who has the power to cast you to hell or heaven?? I dont think that guy can do that...if he can you need to contact me asap!