I have been seeing someone for about six months now. We were never officially "going out". A couple of months before we started seeing each other her bf broke up with her. She took it really hard and was still not quite over him. I understood this and was one of the reasons I was ok with "just seeing" her and not making it official. Recently I have started liking her more and more and she says she feels the same way. I am ready to make it official but she says she is not ready for that. I asked her what she is waiting for and she doesn't give me a straight answer. She tells me she really likes me and she could really fall for me but at the same time she doesn't want make it official. I'm confused by this and I feel like I am just waiting around for her to make up her mind if she really wants to be with me. Should I wait for her to decide what she wants or just accept the fact that if it hasn't happened after six months that it probably won't happen?
2006-07-23 22:14:59 · 3 answers · asked by askewmew 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
That has happened to me before, the girls side, not yours. i think maybe she is just afraid to get hurt again. if she makes it official with you, that means she has you and can loose you. if you really do like her, and you believe she really likes you, that talk to her. tell her you like her, and that you would never do anything to hurt her, and that she needs to let go, you understand shes hurt, but if she doesnt move on her life will never get ne where. and if shes not ready to move on with you, then you may have to just stay friends, because you have put your life on hold for her long enough, and you think maybe its time for you to move on as well, and you hope that she will with you.
2006-07-23 22:22:43 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, first I want to say is men and women take breakups in different ways...but either way both men and women try to protect themselves and try to prevent another heartache...especially since broken hearts hurt a lot. Another thing is the longer the relationship the harder it is for a person to get over their ex, so despite the fact she may be with you and care about you a lot there may be a part of her trying to figure out why the past relationship failed...and due to this she isn't able to fully commit. Since you have only been dating for 6 months, perhaps she is being cautious so she doesn't end up with another broken heart.
My recommendation is to ask her to make things semi-official... this mean that she should consider seeing you exclusively, but neither of you will announce it to everyone. This way technically you both are dating each other only, on the verge of official bf/gf but, it's still open enough for her to be able to let her heart heal. A broken heart takes a lot of time, love, and understanding to heal and so in order to do so, the best thing you can do is be with her and let her know that you are willing to be a great bf and that you want her to be happy and whatever makes her happy will make you happy. Also, try to help her heal by talking about what her fears are for your relationship, and talk to her about trying to figure out ways to prevent things like (her fears) from happening...and ask her what makes her happy in this relationship and then tell her you are will to try your hardest to make her happy...and I hope that helps.
2006-07-24 07:28:13 · answer #2 · answered by monavyas15 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ya just never know. If you're asking, you're wondering. If you're wondering, you are doubting. If you are doubting, you are unsure. If you are unsure, you do not feel secure. If you do not feel secure, there is doubt. If there is doubt, you will never know. If you stay, she may leave. If you leave, how do you know it was wrong not to stay?
Have you just given the problem to God? That works.
2006-07-24 05:29:41 · answer #3 · answered by doglas p 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋