help problem child?

Question

first off let me explain I'm in a wheel chair i suffer with OI (soft bones) my 14 year old son lives with my aunt and i get him from time to time. last night i got up in the middle of the night to check on him he had my 5 kittens in the bath tub soap every where i clean up the kittens and told him for the 5 time to get his butt to bed then at about 530 i herd my kittens screaming i got up and he was trying to drowned one in the toilet. (it died a few hours later) the i found 2 of them with socks tied around their necks so tight they were choking. i firming told him to get to bed. i cant spank him or yell at him because my aunt would have a cow and put me in jail. her and her husband are so called hard core Christan's (they dont act like it) any way i called her and she thought it was funny i dont know what to do but take him home i cant deal with this any one have any ideals about what i should do he will be 15 soon

i dont have any control over any part of his life its all in my aunts hands, i took him to the jail and had a officer talk to him but he didnt listen then i took him to church and they prayed for him when i took him home my aunt said it was my fault for having animals and boy i let her have a ear full i told her it was her fault for not teaching him respect that he sees how she acts and there for he copies her actions she got ticked and started cussing so i told her unless she gets him some help hes not welcome in my house any more i hope i did the right thing. that child is pure evil its a shame when a parent is scared of their own child

i for got to add that my son also has soft bones but he is lucky he can walk not well he limps and he thinks this will keep him out of trouble because people are afraid they will hurt him so they just dismiss his actions

my aunt adopted him agesnt my will when he was 6 months old and i only get to see him 1 week out of the year every time i try and do something the law tells me i have no legal rights this just makes me sick. they live 90 miles away and i call him every other day sometimes every day and when he needs me i always go right to him.

Answer 1

Quote, "I dont have any control over any part of his life its all in my aunts hands, i took him to the jail and had a officer talk to him but he didnt listen then i took him to church and they prayed for him," REPLY: THERE IS NOTHING YOU CAN DO, SEND HIM PRETTY CARDS AND PICTURES, MAYBE SOME DAY YOU CAN GET HIM A COMPUTER AND SHARE THINGS WITH HIM OVER THE COMPUTER. Thearpy is up to your aunt.

Quote,"when i took him home my aunt said it was my fault for having animals and boy i let her have a ear full i told her it was her fault for not teaching him respect that he sees how she acts and there for he copies her actions she got ticked and started cussing so i told her unless she gets him some help hes not welcome in my house any more i hope i did the right thing. that child is pure evil its a shame when a parent is scared of their own child."
REPLY: IF IT IS POSSIBLE FOR A ONE DAY STAY and A MOVIE [OR SOME FORM OF] ACTIVITY DATE AND DINNER DATE AT HIS LOCATION, TRY IT. ALSO HAVE CARD AND PHOTO EXCHANGE OR SOME FUN THINGS TO SHARE AS A FORM OF WEEKLY COMMUNICATION AS A HOPE FOR SOMETHING TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE!!!!

Pray that she can do the right thing, and that therapy works and that you can do the right thing and all works out for his best benefit to make a difference toward him having a more caring attitude, as he could still be to immature. Give up only when it is all that is left to do. TRY THE FUN THINGS WITH PICTURES AND CARDS. THEN THE OTHER.

Answer 2

I feel terrible for you. It sounds like your hands are tied. They say if a child hurts animals then he could turn on humans too. Most of the serial killers like Jeffery Domner and Gacy hurt animals in their youth and moved on to become serial killers. I certainly hope that this does not happen with your son, but I think that he needs help. Your aunt has messed him up. How can a christian not love animals? I just don't know. And he is 14, and hurting animals. I could see it if he was 2 and really didn't know his actions would kill the kitten. He really does need some help, I don't think the aunt is going to get it for him. Your hands are tied. I hope someone has a better answer for you, so you can get some fresh ideas on what to do. I just don't know of any. God bless you and I will pray for you and your son. Good luck.

Answer 3

Wow... You really should get him to a therapist. This could be a sign of something much worse going on in his brain, especially at his age. My mother always tells me a story about when one of my uncles tried to drown some kittens, but he was 4 at the time, so it was different. At your son's age, he should know that that's not right. Talk to your aunt and see if she's noticed anything weird with him when you're not around. And also ask her to support your decision to take him to a therapist. You could also talk to a counselor at his school to see if he's gotten into any trouble there, or if the counselor can recommend someone for him to see.

Good luck.

Answer 4

O dear Children are a problem and in this permissive sociaty it becomes a night mare to punish them. but he does seem way out of control and if he is living with christians should know the difference between right and wrong and to harm the kittens is definatly wrong. if any thing I would sugest you get him taken away from you aunt I can see you can not handle him all children will go through a rebeliuse sage I have to soons and there were times when when I felt they did not listen to me furtunatly now they have matured a bit I will pray for you and him

Answer 5

You have a problem child alright and it sounds to me like it's about to be a problem that will turn into legal issues. If you have custody of him, it's time to put him into a christian home for boys where he can have the discipline he needs in daily order and structure and it be balanced with love and propriety. If you do not have custody and they thought it was funny, you may have to do one of the hardest things Mom's sometimes have to do, report the caregivers, regain your custodial care and then place him. I know this sounds harsh - but if you've never heard the clinging of a jail cell as you leave visitation from your son's prison, trust me, you'll appreciate the fact that you loved him enough to put in a place that can teach and guide him now before his behavior leaves him no other alternatives. Cruelty to animals is a crime and can be punished. At this age and with your bone condition, you can't spank him anyway, he's apt to turn on you. Our social system isn't perfect, but arm yourself with options and information and do not allow him to turn out in a manner you could have intervened and tried to prevent by voluntary placement. He'll hate you for it, but he'll also come around and realize that you saved him from a one way ticket, do not pass go. I used to work at the Arkansas Baptist Boys' Ranch - it was for teenage boys who were not in trouble with the law yet, but the parents saw it on the horizon or had lost their ability to manage control and respect. Whether we like it or not, until they are 18 or out of high school, we are the ones accountable.

Answer 6

It seems like you are in a very difficult situation here. It is never pleasant to realise that you know someone who is cruel, much less when that person is your own child.
Maybe you have done the right thing. 14 is old enough to know that it is not right to drown or torture animals. If your child does not understand this, then in having contact with him, perhaps you are only opening yourself up for more hurt.

Those people are not Christians. It is unfortunate that they believe that they are.

Please try to keep your son away from younger children.

Answer 7

It is best that your child see a professional help. He comes out like this because no ones controlling him-your child needs to be thought the difefrence between good and evil.
The way you described it, he is being spoiled by your aunt and they tolerate his actions which should have been controlled way back when he's younger.
The only thing for you to do is observe and pray taht your child goe to the path of righteousness.

Answer 8

The only advice that I can give is prayer and rebuking. Pray fervently for your son and when you see him doing these awful things, immediately and as loud as you can say "Satan, I rebuke you right now, in the name of Jesus!"

You see satan doesn't like when you speak in Jesus' name and he will flee. That isn't to say that he won't try to enter your home through your son again though. You have to say it and believe it. Another thing, your son might be possessed with a demon. Tell it to come out in the name of Jesus. This isn't always easy or immediate, but when you have faith, it will come to pass.

Answer 9

You need to get him into therapy, because he is your son. You do not want him to be like this the rest of his life. He obviously has a problem, and you need to get him help.

Also don't have any more pets or anything, obviously.

I hope he gets better.

Answer 10

MAYBE HE IS SUFFERING FROM YOU BEING SICK. I DONT THINK HE IS EVIL, I THINK HE JUST NEEDS A BETTER ENVOIRNMENT TO BE IN. IF HIS AUNT IS LAUGHING AT HIM DOING THOSE KIND OF THINGS, THEN SHE HAS A PROBLEM. HE SHOULD BE TRYING TO HELP YOU SINCE YOU ARE WHEELCHAIR BOUND. DOESNT SEEM LIKE SHES SUCH A GOOD INFLUENCE ON HIM. YOU NEED TO GET HIM SOME HELP.