Okay I'm going to go by 1 and 2 so no names are used here...
So I was recently seeing number 1 and we become 'closer' so to say. how close does not matter.... we were close a few times for about a month or so... however he's starting the police academy and has been having less time and going to bed early to prepare
I started hanging out with 2 and become slowly interested in him as the days went out as i continuously hung out with him.... so I eventually started giving up on 1 because he was non responsive non flirtatious and he was always that way it never changed into that
So I went to a little get together at my friends house and 2 was there and then 1 showed up... super akward...
I can't tell if 1 is still interested in me or not he's a pretty deep guy and hates showing emotion... while 2 is the ooposite to that sense, I kind of like 1 more but if he's not interested in me then why bother? so I just dunno what to do.
Should I pursue 1 or 2? how can I tell if 1 still likes me?
2006-07-23 18:44:20 · 11 answers · asked by USCfemme10 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Okay I need to add more details please read the whole thing I NEED help on this None of my friends can help because the know people to personally and they are an outsider view...
Okay so 1: He is almost exactly my type in the fact he's older, he is my physical desire, he has a great deep personality, however He's never open with how he feels and thats what bothers me.. he'll never admit he likes me or that he wants to hang out its always a maybe and stuff, though a maybe usually is a yes... but regardless it bothers me
NOW 2: 2 Genuinely cares for me and my personality, he's the sweetest thign ever to me and he's a great guy, He has a good personality he's not as goodlooking as 1 but he still looks good to my liking not as much but doens't matter. However, he has SOME things that bother me, but overall he actually shows that he does care.. so
I dunno 1 or 2?
2006-07-23 18:44:30 · update #1
I was asked what bothers me about 2... just a few smal personality quarks nothing serious...He rides a motorcycle which my mom wouldn't approve, and he has a tattoo which doesn't bother me but again.. my mother, I know i can't please my mom but, still its something I consider in mY mind.
2006-07-23 18:51:50 · update #2
and also, I kind of hate just dangeling along 2 as 'backup' because it feels mean. But I hate the thought of just choosing 2 and risk hurting 1's feelings..ughhh...
2006-07-23 18:53:04 · update #3
I didn't pursue 2, 2 started pursuing me and overtime started capturing a fondness from me because he's a classic 'sweet' guy that really makes you feel good... but still.... 1 eh i dunno
2006-07-23 18:55:40 · update #4
To respond to a jerk down below I didn't SCREW around behind anyones back let alone screw at all I'm not that type of person.. when I said "close" i didn't mean in that way or I would've just said that also, I'm not trying to get other people to pick for me
its just to try and see others view on the issue to let me work things out in my mind regardless I'm going to choose who I want but I want to see an outside view
2006-07-23 19:08:36 · update #5
I know your choices listed are 1 or 2 but, truthfully it doesn't sound like either is the right fit. 1 isn't emotionally attached and it doesn't sound like he'll change to some emotional guy overnight yet it sounds like you want and/or may need that from your mate. 2 is Mr. Nice guy but, it doesn't sound like he truly fills up your "mate" scorecard. Otherwise you'd be all over him already but, from what I'm reading it seems you're truly stuck on 1 and really want to dig deeper to see what he's really feeling inside which he's not willing to share. 2 sounds like he's just there as your security blanket in case things totally shut off with 1. All in all, it doesn't sound like 1 is ready for what you're ready for and if you get involved with 2 he sounds like the classic candidate for nice guys finishing last because eventually you'll come across someone who's a little better looking, a little more interesting, without the annoying things he possesses and then 2 will be history. Therefore...keep your options and searching open because when you come across Mr. Right you'll have no doubt and no need to ask us here on Yahoo.
2006-07-23 18:58:36 · answer #1 · answered by oneluv66366 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Well I don't think that there really is a choice to be made. It seems as though 1 has made the decision for you by the way he is reacting. However I understand your dilemma. It seems like 1 is really the one you like the most and the only reason you are with 2 is because of the attention he shows you. Now, if it is 1 that you truly adore and you have an inkling that he has feelings for you than I would say to pursue HIM. And if your feelings are not returned at least you can walk away knowing and not live your life wondering what could have been.
2006-07-24 02:00:13 · answer #2 · answered by dredlockgoddess 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Number 1 ...If it seems like he is not spending as much time with you , he is probably studying at the academy...Give him some time to get into his new job. He sounds like a nice guy and if you care about him why are you looking for someone else...Just talk to him and find out and tell him how you feel..He can't read minds. Then if he isn't doing what you think he should do well then I would wait , don't rush into anything with someone else on the rebound cuz you will get hurt....1 will find his way ...The Police Academy is something new and he will come around give him time
2006-07-24 01:53:43 · answer #3 · answered by Mrs. M 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW. Instead of having strangers choose who you should choose - think about who you would rather spend the rest of your life with, who would please you more, who can be your companion and who you can trust. Who makes you laugh? Who would you rather cuddle with at the end of the day? It sounds like you're at a point in your life that you're looking for a serious relationship? If so, you need to ask yourself those questions. If you think that #1 could be the one for you, contact him and ask him if he still wants to be with you. It won't be an easy conversation, but you owe it to him and yourself.
2006-07-24 01:58:34 · answer #4 · answered by ZZ_Bear 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So you started screwing around on your #1 because he wasn't paying enough attention to you because he is prepping for the police academy,and improve his life,and thus making your life better?
There are names for women like you,the least of which is selfish,and self-serving.
I hope #1 drops your sorry ...
2006-07-24 01:56:09 · answer #5 · answered by kents411 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The answer is OBVIOUS go with #1 ! He is HOT and will never bring his stressful job baggage home and he won't internalize his frustration with you and his job by abusing ALCOHOL and YOU! And don't forget the GREAT lifestyle oppotunties afforded a 25 year old widow with a CHILD-marry that cop you will have it MADE!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
2006-07-24 01:56:45 · answer #6 · answered by badmts 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i say 1 give hI'm a chance maybe he's having a rough time trying to get his emotions out. like what im trying to say is that talk to him ask him whats wrong. what can i do to help? then maybe he might show something and might change. give hI'm another chance and if im wrong leave 2 as aback up plan.
2006-07-24 01:51:52 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say 2 but what are some of the things that bother you about him?
2006-07-24 01:50:03 · answer #8 · answered by Steel D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it is complex, its telling me that your not sure what you want or your not ready to pick one or the other.
You should be figuring this out on your own. Maybe you should do a little more growing.
2006-07-24 01:48:45 · answer #9 · answered by Baghdad Pete ! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
both for a little while then choose whichever one is the niceest to you..that is what really matters
2006-07-24 01:48:08 · answer #10 · answered by cvhiew8873 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋