When I look back at my kids who are now 19 and 21, I have a lot of regrets that I didn't have more patience with them and spend more time with them. I could give lots of excuses but its too late.
I single parented 2 kids and put myself thru nursing school and it was a struggle. I look at them now and they are all grown up and I feel terrible about all the babysitters, and yelling at them for not doing what I told them to do. My daughter went to class with me with the chicken pox because the sitter would no watch her and my son had to sit in the lobby of this college to watch her and wait on me to come out of class. If I didn't go, I would have failed the class. I had no help, no inlaws. No one. My ex treated us terrible and was no help. A lot of guilt I guess.
2006-07-23 18:42:24 · 14 answers · asked by happydawg 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I can relate to everything you said. My ex was abusive and loved to run around. My children had to grow up early and learn to look out for themselves when I worked. It was very hard, but we made it. I wish now I was not so strict on them, and that they could have just enjoyed being kids when they had to. It is too late now. They are all grown and gone. We live by our mistakes.
2006-07-23 18:47:26 · answer #1 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My friend, you did the best you could, considering the circumstances. Do you ever ask yourself if you love them enough? Well in my opinion, your own feelings of concern with this issue, prove that you do. Life does not guarantee that you will be happy, without trouble, etc. In fact, Christ said that there would be troubles. If you are feeling guilt, or shame, that does not come from God. It comes from your inner self and satan, the deceiver. God does provide conviction in our hearts. But this is on the past and nothing can be done about choices made long ago. Lets say you give this to your Father, who loves you abundantly, and try very hard not to look back on your mistakes. You provided for these kids, and even if they don't realize it now, they will one day. It may happen when they become parents themselves, or maybe when a gentle memory of a mother working very hard to care for them, emerges from their hearts. One more thought: Do you understand love? It is not just a feeling. It is an action. You were there for your children, even if it was in the form of a babysitter. You gave them your best. You showed them with action just how much you loved them, by being there for them and caring for their needs. God bless you, and may you receive peace that has no other delivery than that which comes from God, your Father.
Enormous hugs to you!
2006-07-23 19:03:01 · answer #2 · answered by Lovemyfamily 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Every single day for the rest of my life......my kids are 27, 25 & 23. I wasn't a single parent, but might as well have been since my husband became mentally ill when the kids were very young, I did my best, but made mistakes I can't take back. While my husband can't help his illness, it wasn't easy being father and mother to 2 boys and a girl. My heart goes out to you, one parent to another. The only "help" I had was other family members critizing everything I did and undermining my every move. I too attended college while raising my kids, worked to pay for my education and no help from anyone. God Bless You.
2006-07-23 18:55:53 · answer #3 · answered by Daydream Believer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When it comes to raising kids, all parents have regrets. It's normal to wish you had done less of one thing and more of another, or wishing you could have done something differently.
If you have real regrets, then you should take the time to sit down and discuss your feelings with your kids. You may find that they are a lot more forgiviing of you than you are of yourself.
If they turn out to be terrific people as they begin moving into adulthood, then you must have done something right.
It's time for you to begin letting go of the guilt, and to start a new chapter in your future relationship with them...this time as adults. ;-)
Good Luck To You & Them~*
2006-07-23 19:05:43 · answer #4 · answered by DG 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look regret is usually triggered by guilt...In raising children there is no room for it. Biblical your asking for trouble..Children use guilt to get around discipline. They also use it as a reason to disrespect the parent. Don't let it happen because especially if your a single parent you'll loose control and your self respect.
2006-07-23 18:50:26 · answer #5 · answered by Dark Knight 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop looking back in the past ,you can't change it no matter how much you picture it in your head,never can you change it.But stop wasting your time concentrating on this little fact and go know your children a little better than you did when they were little. they maybe older but they are still your children and they still need you.Look at this opportunity as God giving you a second chance to be with your children and to connect with them .life is to short, so stop using your precious time looking back ,but instead by learning from it and making your present ,and future life better than the past.
And try to see that what you sacrificed made your children a little bit stronger than most.
Good luck with everything!
2006-07-23 18:52:53 · answer #6 · answered by melen t 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No regrets. I wish I was able to spend more time with them, but hey gotta work. You did the best you could and no one is perfect right? You also cared enough to take them with you, rather than leave them home all alone. I'm sure they appreciate all you did for them.
2006-07-23 18:48:24 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
but the reward was worth it all i had to leave mines but i had help my goals was shatter after they became adults i put every thing on hold for my babies which are all grown now after they became adults i wanted to do my own thing i was in a automobile accdent now its there time and they love me for the mother i was when they had no one else they had mama would not tradefor the world what i am saying they want forget what you went thru for them thats call a real mother
2006-07-23 18:51:50 · answer #8 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
whilst my dad grew to become into alive, lower back in the best previous days whilst he had a humorousness, we'd continuously be pulling pranks. One time, jointly as he grew to become into asleep, I placed whipped cream around his face, and then whilst he awoke to stroke his face like maximum folk do, he have been given whipped cream on his face. yet over lower back, I gave him a container of bandages as a contemporary yet as quickly as I informed him to open it, interior grew to become right into a small fish which made him leap lol, and a discount for me to get loose piggy lower back rides, as much as i needed. As he have been given older, he tolerated my pranks even much less, so i assume him and that i in simple terms grew to become much less prankish and greater distant. The greater contemporary pranks I pull with my acquaintances do not look 0.5 as just about as exciting as a results of fact those I did with my dad. No experience in posting them lol.
2016-11-02 21:09:04 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't worry about regrets that was the past, just say sorry to them evene they though know what you are talking about and try to enjoy yourself with them as much as you can when they have time
2006-07-23 19:05:10 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋