I like this guy but hes younger, what should i do?

Question

Ok, here it is: Im a senior, and hes a sophmore...i like him ALOT but just that fact that hes younger and i care what everyone else thinks, i dont know what i should do...what do you think?

Answer 1

Once you get a little older, you will look back and realize how silly it is to care so much about what other people think. You will wish you had done things you hadn't because of this 'what other people think' crap. Do what you want, not what you feel others will or will not approve of. Live your life, not some fanciful idea of what other people may or may not approve of. Remember: they would feel the same way in your shoes. Those who break free from these types of fears really live life... those who don't are stuck within the prison of their own fears.

Answer 2

I think there are other questions that you might need to ask before you take on this question. When you say senior vs sophomore, are you talking about high school or college? There's a very essential difference, namely the answer to the question 'Is there any possibility we could be ready for a permanent relationship?'

See, it's always a good idea to take one's course of action to its logical conclusion, in one's mind, before doing anything at all. And let's face it: a lot of times people don't do that, they start dating, they end up in bed together.

And they do this without taking steps first to make each other really most important in each other's lives (even more so than Mom and Dad), and make a permanent commitment to each other, in front of family and friends.

And then they wonder how the breakup happened, or how that third party got into the picture. And they don't feel good about that, because they realize, rightly but only too late, that this kind of thing is not supposed to happen - ever - after you have had sex.

Now, let's say the result of that 'trial run' in your mind leads you to the conclusion not to have sex before putting each other first and making the permanent commitment before witnesses. There's still the question of 'OK, if we aren't going to do sex, then how far is too far?'

Well, sex creates a one-flesh relationship (which is why it shouldn't be broken up afterwards), but I'm sure we all agree that there are certain behaviors which, while they stop short of that, they are very clear steps in that direction.

This is in some measure culturally defined. In some cultures, even spending time alone together is considered a step in that direction. In others, touching each other at all is considered such a step. In yet others, there is some sort of definition of 'platonic' and 'non-platonic' touching.

Anyway, then the thing to do is figure out where your boundary is between platonic and non-platonic for yourself, taking into account your culture. Then ask yourself: Does it make sense to cross that line, take steps in the direction of a one-flesh relationship, before we are absolutely sure that's what we want?

You have no doubt figured out that the permanent commitment I have been talking about here is marriage. And being absolutely sure would then mean at very least being engaged - with the assujmption that engagements cannot be broken (except maybe if you find out your fiance was cheating on you or something).

If you concluded from all this that it doesn't really make sense to do anything non-platonic before at least getting engaged, you wouldn't be by any means the only person on the planet to come to that conclusion. I know I have - and it's not like I don't know what I'm missing, I'm 42 and been here and there and done at least a bit of this and that (and I'm still single).

So anyway, let's say you have decided what you are going to do about all of the above. Then, yeah, there is the question of 'What about other people?' Well, I would say it definitely doesn't make sense to think in terms of a permanent commitment until you really put him first - that means not caring what other people think.

Sure, other people might have something valuable to say, they might notice things about this guy's character that you may not have, etc., but when all is said and done, it is your decision and you are the one who is responsible for it and has to live with it.

And until you are ready to make that kind of assumption - that even your parents will not have to suffer any consequences even if, God forbid, the relationship goes bad or breaks up - then there too, it doesn't make sense to think in terms of permanent commitment.

So, to sum up: before you do anything, think about your dividing line between 'platonic' and 'non-platonic', and what sort of behavior makes sense given your current or potential commitment status, and think about really putting him first and taking sole ultimate responsibility for your decision, independently of Mom and Dad. If the moment comes when you feel ready to do that, then, hey, why not go for it if you feel he's the right person to spend your life with?

Answer 3

The typical worry about younger guys is that they havent matured as fast as girls. Do you have things in common with him, are you able to hang out with him, do you feel comfortable around him? Why would everyone else care if hes a great guy for you? go for it

Answer 4

If you really like him then you should date him. You should not care what other people think, they are not the ones that are dating him.....you shouldnt let other people run your life just because you care so much of what they think. You need to have a mind of your own. (not meant in a rude way, just to help you out)

Answer 5

first off dont care about what other people thing. If he makes u happy then do it ..Half those people will not be your friend after schools out anyway. And the ones that are will back u up no mader who u date

Answer 6

The best relationship I ever had was with a man 3 yrs younger than me.

Answer 7

i have been reading through alot of the posts and solutions about singles and courting. all of it comes all the way down to at least one question: ARE you fairly IN LOVE WITH HIM? cauz if ur in love, and really in love, the purely opinion that would want to rely might want to be HIS opinion. 2d, in accordance to me, a twelve months youthful isn't some thing!!!!!!..... i comprehend what i recommend..... only be attentive to the very incontrovertible certainty that all and sundry men have a tendency to be immature.... and extremely last yet no longer least: discover your love!!!! playstation . i comprehend i'm being really easy, yet it truly is what i imagine a pal must be *winks*

Answer 8

If you like him, go for it.

Just keep in mind that you are going to be turning 18, and he will still be a minor... be careful with that situation

Answer 9

if u really like him like u say alot then i think that what other ppl think wont matter as long as ur happy then it wont even matter. yea at 1st ppl would say omgosh she older then him but after few weeks that is old news and ppl would get over it. and they wont even care about it anymore.

Answer 10

Depends on how serious you wanna get. I wouldn't get too attached since after you graduate you'll probably have to end it since you'll be going off to college.