I have been interested in boys and have had a few interested in me, its not because Im shy or afraid to date, I just havent felt ready. I have lots of friends, some of them being males and I am happy, its just that I work full time now and go to school full time, on my days off I barely want to hang out with friends because I want to relax at home. I went through highschool not dating because I didnt believe in highschool romance. At my age, to have never had a boyfriend or been on a date, is that abnormal? Should I just date to please my parents and friends who are worried about me?
2006-07-23 16:39:50 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
First of all your are not abnormal. I am 20 and am in a similar situation as you, as so as many other teens. My parents do worry about me as do friends, but you have to do whats right for you. If you don't feel ready to date and have relationships, just don't. Simple. You do it at your own pace, the way things flow. Like you said, right now your in college and have a full time job, a lot work just as I. I know it can be tiring. Work, school and needing to spend time with another, planning dates and activities, hours on the phone and of course drama when couples have ocasional fights. That can be very stressful to you, but some people can do all that, but it seems you can not.
Many people don't see that being in a relationship and to keep it working takes a lot of work! I see my best friend with his girlfriend have a lot of fights some serious some just lasting a few days to others lasting about a day. Very stressful. Do you want to think about a fight you had with your boyfriend while studying for finals? NOPE.
It all really depends on the flow of things and your decisions. You are not abnormal, your pretty smart for waiting.
But why serious relationships, take it slow, see if you can go on a date. A date with a boy doesn't mean they'll become automatically your boyfriend. Have some fun. You aren't the only one with this situation, don't feel abnormal.
2006-07-23 17:01:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
No, of course it's not abnormal. It's just your choice. I went 24 years without a girlfriend--not that I didn't want to date; I was just shy around girls. Trust me, you are still young and you have your whole life in front of you. Enjoy your freedom while you can, because once you become a couple with someone, you can't do all of the things you were used to doing on your own. After I got over the hump of not having a girlfriend, now I've had plenty of rollercoaster rides and my share of "couple problems" and am happy to have some time to myself now (in between girlfriends).
It sounds great that you can just relax at home on your days off. There's nothing wrong with that. You are just the type of person who needs time to yourself. You'll be ready when you're ready; don't let anyone pressure you into having a boyfriend; there is plenty of time for that later.
===================
Mikey, what are you talking about? Where do you find a clue that she's bisexual just because she doesn't feel like dating right now? That has nothing to do with bisexuality. It's just her choice not to date anyone at the moment--how does that equal "bisexual" to you? Maybe that's how you were--as a guy--in high school, but it doesn't mean a girl would be bisexual just because she chooses not to date in school. You are way out in left field on this one, buddy.
2006-07-23 23:51:27 · answer #2 · answered by ♣Tascalcoán♣ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's normal, because 99% of the time, high school relationships usually aren't worth the drama or gossip which goes with them. The experience might be good to date before college, but that's all high school dating is usually good for. Besides, when your'e a teenager, you are influenced by others and some of the mistakes (such as getting messed up with the wrong person or not being ready to have sex and you have it anyway) you may regret later on down the road.
2006-07-24 01:26:44 · answer #3 · answered by lacey_2000_02453 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My cousin was the same way. She didn't get her first boyfriend until college. It just means that most of your life you have focused on being friends with boys and not bf/gf. Don't get caught up with the whole bf/gf thing. You will know when it is the right time to date. Don't do something you don't want to do just to please everyone else. IT IS YOUR LIFE! I think the whole going out thing is stupid. People get so caught up in it and their grades reflect it. I'm sure you had better grades than some girls that are boy crazy. Anyway, don't be too worried about it. Someday Mr. Perfect will pop into your life and you will know it is the right time. Until then, enjoy being a young adult and just relax and hang out with your friends. Hope everything goes well.
Good Luck!
2006-07-23 23:50:08 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well in that case ur probably bisexual. I didnt have a girlfriend till i was 22 and im bisexual. It was never really an option to get a girlfriend because i was only interested in girls for about half the time. Be honest with urself, if u r bisexual then as u get older it will become less of a big deal and eventually u may find, like me that ur feelings for the same sex go away, and then it will be much easier for u to get a boyfreind
2006-07-23 23:48:54 · answer #5 · answered by mikey 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats normal, nothing wrong wit that. My friend, shes like...WOW an she didnt go out becuz she wanted 2 do the skool thing b4 anything else. So I say its perfectly ok. But if u feel that U need 2 satisfy other people or sumthing, then try 2 make time n hanging out at the club or sum social area, then atleast it will show others that ur trying 2 get wit sumone an that ur interestd n dating sum1. But other than that, Thanx 4 the 2 points...BOO-YA!!!
2006-07-23 23:48:07 · answer #6 · answered by bL@cK lUsTeR sOlD!Er 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing wrong with you. You just have other priorities. Believe me when the right man comes along, you will know. Stop letting people pressure you into something you feel you are not ready for. Besides the way this world is right now, I don't blame you for waiting for the right time and the right man. You have to deal with this issue, not your friends, parents or anyone else. This is your decision only. I applaud you for not giving into what society thinks you should be doing at this age. Kudos to a woman with her own mind.
2006-07-23 23:43:48 · answer #7 · answered by BluePassion 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You go Girl......!Trust me,"Let the sleeping dogs lie"as the saying goes.Can I please impose some questions to you. say its your b/day. .
1)Would you like your best friend or any friend give you a used gift after they have gone ahead and used it or after they have purposely asked you what you wanted 4 your birthday gone and used it b4 reaping it 4u. 2)Am I looking forward 4 instant Gratification or ever lasting.people would not understand....whats on the other side. 3)Am I ready to drop it here/ff what others are doing/CAN'T I make difference / how can I live a full LIFE in this insane world where you have found peace and sanity
2006-07-24 00:20:49 · answer #8 · answered by gabesackey2020 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes...it's normal...you probably just didn't take the time to date the "useless" guys that a lot of girls date when they're in high school...good for you! don't date or try to find somebody just to please your parents. you should do it when you're ready and when you find somebody who appreciates you for who you are and can make you laugh. the best suggestion i can give you is be friends with a guy before you start dating them. it will make things so much better when you have that foundation.
2006-07-23 23:43:36 · answer #9 · answered by Lo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you are absolutely normal...I am 19 and have never dated i have hung out with guys but i dont date them. You are just a busy woman the same with me. I dont even care what ppl think of me if i havent been out with a guy or anything it just seems high schoolish.
2006-07-23 23:45:27 · answer #10 · answered by sam 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋