what do i do if my boyfriend wants to have sex ?

Answer 1

Great question, but the wrong question.

Instead ask yourself: Do you want to have sex?

Not an easy one to answer is it? There is the hormone side saying "Oh yeah that sounds exciting and fun!" there is the Christian side saying "Heck no you sinner, not till your married!" and then there is the rest of you going "Well, I kinda do, and I kinda don't" for a thousand different reasons!

Your job is to sort through all this stuff and figure out what you want to do. Nobody can tell you what to do. I can however give you a few things to think about:

Of course, there is NOTHING wrong with waiting till marriage and many many people see this as the only answer.

It is not important what your boyfriend wants, despite what you may think. This one is all about you! It is YOUR body, YOUR temple and you decide who gets to come in! The only way you should have sex is if your ready to. If he can't understand that, then he isn't worth your time and certainly NOT your body. If your worried about social repercussions, don't sweat it. Despite what you may think, your peers will respect you for standing up for yourself. Social issues are not worth it when considering this type of decision.

Sex complicates relationships. Things go to a whole new level. If feelings are deep and love is in the air, then this can bring a whole new depth and wonderfulness to a relationship. If not, it can bring confusion and a cycle of emotionless sex which is so harmful to both of you (although many people don't realize it for awhile).

Are you of age to have freedom of your life? If your living under your parents roof, you need to respect their rules as well...even about something so personal. They adopt these rules for a reason. Nobody will love you as much as a set of good parents and they do things to protect you first and foremost...remember that.

Once you make your decision, decide what you are and aren't willing to do. Communicate these boundaries and stick to them!! If he can't handle it, he isn't for you. If you decide to, make sure your safe...please please pleaes insist on the use of a condom!! You don't need to become a victim of early pregnancy or disease! If you decide not, tell him you've thought about it and you don't want a relationship on that level yet. If he can't understand that, then he isn't really into you anyway, he's after the sex.

I hope this helps. Talk with your parents if you think you can do so without provoking the panic mode. Let them know you want an open, frank discussion, not a lecture. This will usually snap parents out of it...hopefully they can remember when they were your age and didn't want the lecture either.

If you need to, PM me...I'm always willing to help!.

Answer 2

Well the first thing you should do is....

Figure out what your NET pay is per month....how much money are you bringing in.

Get out the local newspaper and see what the average cost of a two bedroom apartment is.

Call the utility companies and find out what the average cost of electricity, water and heat is for a 2 bedroom apartment.

Find out how much car payments, insurance, gas and repair on a car is going to cost each month.

Get out the store flyers and look at the prices of groceries, formula and diapers.

Call around and find out how much daycare costs in your town.

Figure out if you are making enough money to afford all of those things if you happen to get pregnant.

If you can afford a baby on your own with no help from anyone else financially then go ahead and have sex.

Remember that NO FORM of birth control is 100% effective even if you use it as you are supposed to all the time.

There is no such think as SAFE sex....only SAFER SEX.

Another thing to keep in mind is that the younger you are when you start being sexually active the higher your risk of catching many different STD's some of which are silent, you will not know that you ever had them (PID's for example) and you could end up with badly scared fallopian tubes that will make it impossible for you to get pregnant later in life when you might WANT to.

Answer 3

do u want to have sex? If not, let him know, and go from there. If he's not cool with that, then it's time to look elsewhere. Don't push urself to do something u don't want to do, but will make the other person happy. On the other hand, if ur ready, but don't know what to do, just ask him what he'd like u to do, then u could figure out what ur willing to do, and go from there.

Answer 4

Do whatever you feel comfortable doing. If you dont think you are ready for sex with your boyfriend, then just explain that you are not ready. If he really cares about you, he will respect your choice. Remember, never to do something just because someone wants you to, it will just lower your self-esteem and you will regret it as time goes on. If you are ready, then go ahead, just be safe!

Answer 5

if your having any kind of doubt about having sex with him, then that means youre not ready. just tell him how u feel and hopefully he'll understand. if he gives u any trouble then he doesnt respect u or your feelings. go with your instincts (i didnt listen to them in the past and i was very heartbroken) your a woman and women are strong, SO KEEP STRONG!! dont end up havin sex with when u dont want to youll regret it in the future.

Answer 6

get naked

if you're not having sex -
he's not a boyfriend -
he's a friend who is a boy

A man is only as faithful as his options,
so you should start giving him some relief,
soon

Especially if that's really you in your avatar - hottie

I guarantee he's doing alot of masturbation when he gets home from seeing you, or some body else is getting naked for him

Answer 7

Gee. What a hot looking babe, with a hot question, your E-mail, and answer column, is going to be huge. You will be a busy girl reading them all.
Here is my two bits worth, If you are old enough, but don't wish to do it with him, then don't.
Either the time, isn't right for you, or he isn't right for you. It's that simple. In either case, it's a no go, on that question.

Answer 8

For the love of God! If that's you in the avatar, do it! Make sure your using common sense and of course legal age etc. But if your as gorgeous as your avatar, I understand perfectly how your boyfriend must feel. Your the bomb.

Answer 9

Do whatever makes you feel comfortable. If you want to have sex, go for it. If you don't, tell him that and he will understand.

Answer 10

Stick to you guns....in other words; if it is right than it's right, if not than NO is NO. I am Christian, so marriage before sex isn't ok...but it happens! Be safe whatever you do. Respect yourself and your body!! Take care.