me and my girlfriend have bben going out for the past 2 yrs. and her parents are aholes and they dont like me cause my girlfriend picks me up in there car. i hade no time in the past to get a car cause all the stuff i went thru in my life and her parents cant let that go. do you think im in the wrong or are her parents just aholes? but im on the way to getting a car i just recently got my lisence and im saving up to get a car very very soon.
2006-07-23 09:28:51 · 26 answers · asked by ningamunkey 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
JUST BEAR IT TILL YOU GET YOUR CAR THEN THEY CAN BE AS SHOLES ALLTHEY WANT CAUSE YOU WILL BE PICKING HER UP.
2006-07-23 09:30:58 · answer #1 · answered by wrestlersmama1967 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Fair or not, it's probably a sign if irresponsibility on your part to them.
Parents of girls tend to be more protective, and they are not interested in just anyone becoming important to their daughters. So again, regardless of why, they are going to hold you to a high standard, and if you aren't there, you're going to have a tougher time of it.
I don't know how old you are, but the older you get, the tougher it will be; when you get to the age of marriage-ability (is that butchering the english language or what?) they want to know your job path, are you already on the way, did you graduate college, how do you plan to take care of my little girl, etc, etc, etc.
If you want to really impress the parents, get to know them a little better, and when you can appropriately bring it up (not out of the blue; look for the right time) talk about the idea that they must see their daughter having to pick you up all the time in a negative light. DO NOT give them the reasons why you don't have one; don't seek their understanding. Tell them you know that you should not be at a point in life where she is doing this for you, and you're working hard so that it won't be that way for much longer.
1st, have your girlfriend invite you to some family functions, and purposefully get to know the parents, don't sweat whether or not they "like" you; they can only like you inasmuch as they get to know you. As of now, until they know you as a person, you're only the guy stealing time away from being with their daughter.
2nd, start trying to plan some things where she doesn't have to come pick you up all the time. Have real dates, and when they are over, have her go home. Don't use her transportation and your lack of it to give you excuses to just hang out.
Now, it's up to you if you do this...frankly, I'm expecting you'll ignore this and continue to just believe the parents don't like you. I was a young man too, that would have been my inclination. But if you'll listen to me, you'll be glad you did.
2006-07-23 16:40:52 · answer #2 · answered by You'll Never Outfox the Fox 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Congratulations on having your own car. It's good your getting a car, if, your at the legal age to drive. If so, At least her parents hopefully will see this as being responsible on your part. Parents are looking out for the welfare of their daughter, and don't want her to get hurt,
that's all.. Make sure you keep your insurance payments current. Are you working or going to school? Do one or the both, education is so important now. Always put your best step forward, you can only learn from the lesson's of your past. Sound's like your on the path of doing things right and positive for yourself. Keep in contact with mentors and role models. They can assist you in a right direction towards your success. Good Luck!
2006-07-23 16:46:16 · answer #3 · answered by ianthra2010 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that her parents are just worried that if you and your girlfriend get married, you may not be able to take care of her. They are just being parents. It sounds like you are starting to take steps that will show that you are responsible. Just keep on that track and be civil to her parents so that if you do marry, they will have respect for you, not disdain. Your life will be a lot easier if you all get along.
Of course there is always the possibility that her parents are the overprotective type who will never think that anyone is good enough for their little girl. If this is the case, all you can do is to be the best man you can for your girlfriend so that she will side with you over her parents, and if you get married, move as far away from them as possible.
2006-07-23 16:40:08 · answer #4 · answered by runningviolin 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think they are aholes. its not your fault and they should understand that. Plus you mentioned you had some stuff you had to go through. Her parents should be somewhat reasonable cause you might not had an easy life like their daughter has. its good you got your license now and saving for a car so you might not have a problem with them after you get your car. i hope it works out for you.
2006-07-23 16:33:07 · answer #5 · answered by alexia 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like her parents are being a bit unfair to me.
You obviously care for their daughter very much or you wouldn't be with her for 2 years, they should be happy shes with someone whos trying to make life better.
Parents can be very strange with their childrens partners, I know that first hand! Just try to get on with them as best as you can, if they dont do the same then thats their loss and at least you can say 'i was mature about the situation'
so no i don't think you're in the wrong.
I hope things get better for you, good luck honey x
2006-07-23 16:39:59 · answer #6 · answered by lisa j 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your on the right track! get independent, take charge of your life, let people and things that don't really mater roll right off. People like her parents can be aholes, for a lot of reasons. previous boy friends, I am a father and I watch out for the boys that have dated my girls and I will when my youngest starts dating. So hang in there keep doing what you need to do, and PS, pay it forward, it really works! good luck
2006-07-23 16:36:24 · answer #7 · answered by duster360 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have got to be the busiest person ever. You have not had time to get a car, and you saving to get a car soon. I doubt her parents are the Aholes here.
2006-07-23 16:39:46 · answer #8 · answered by wanderin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My guess is that they suspect you of not being very responsible. An independent adult male needs to be able to support himself, which includes a job, a place to live, and a way to get around (on your own, without your girlfriend.) If you want to have the respect of her parents, you will have to earn it. You will need to become the kind of man that her parents wish for their daughter's future.
The fact that you call them names leans me towards her parents' side. You seem immature. If you are more mature than I can tell from this posting, set aside a time to talk with her parents and ask them how you can become the kind of man they would respect and want for their daughter. Seriously ask for specific ideas of things you can do to have a better relationship with her parents. If you can sincerely ask for their input and then respond to it as best you can, you will be on your way to earning their respect.
2006-07-23 16:38:04 · answer #9 · answered by happygirl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that most parents want their daughters to be with a responsible guy. So, it's probably not just about the fact that you don't have a car. There are probably more factors as to why they may not be happy with their daughter dating you. Such as, are you responsible? Do you have a job? Are you unemployed and that's why you don't have a car. Did you just get your license because you just turned 16 or did you just get it back after having it suspended...things to think about.
2006-07-23 16:33:11 · answer #10 · answered by kim 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it pretty much depends on what the "stuff" you went through is....did it involve drugs/jail/knocking up another girl?
If any of that is true then if I was a parent to that girl I'd be very concerned about my child's future with you in it.
If you've already run your own life off into the ditch why would they want you to drag their child down there with you?
2006-07-23 16:32:15 · answer #11 · answered by Jennifer B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋