We end up argueing about stupid things, but he would rather me be angry all day, instead of talking it out and working everything out to have a good day.
2006-07-23 08:33:54 · 39 answers · asked by allpastforgotten 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
you need a new boyfiend.
2006-07-23 08:36:37 · answer #1 · answered by coolbeansnyc 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, because he's a guy. They hate to talk, especially at a rough time when they figure whatever they say, it will work against them. They do know that we have the superior verbal skills. I don't know if it would help you, but when my teenage male comes home upset, or gets angry at me, I leave him alone for awhile, then lure him into the car for a drive. I do find that a drive, no eye contact, very slow and subtle approaching of the topic, can help. It gets him to talk so much more than a direct confrontation. After he's had time to relax...
You might try it, and good luck to you!
2006-07-23 08:40:29 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because he didn't learn that from the people who raised him. You can try to teach him this skill by leading by example, although it does get very frustrating and is a very difficult thing to do. Remember that it takes two people to argue, you are also participating in it. In order to teach him how to do better you need to be better yourself. Walk away, refuse to participate in anything that is unproductive. Tell him you will speak to him again when he is ready and able to have a reasonable discussion. When he figures out that there is no pay off (people only do things when there is a pay off to be had) he'll start thinking about how to change it. Thats when you introduce some good communication skills to him by reading a book about it yourself. There are lots of things available about communication between couples.
2006-07-23 08:41:28 · answer #3 · answered by dappersmom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ever consider he simply doesn't want to argue? There are a variety of ways to solve a problem or issue. Some like to talk about it immediately, some prefer a cool down period prior to getting into it. Sit down and find a method that works for both of you....not just you.
2006-07-23 08:37:13 · answer #4 · answered by blackwind45 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The age old question asked by millions no billions of women since the Begin of time. Because he is the man you ll never know just like all other males.U will never b able 2 completely delve n 2 his whole heart r mind.We will never know what makes them tick,u must not b come a victim and realize this u will always need support n dealing with the male species and their inner lives welcome 2 the why men committee my dear young sister.
2006-07-23 08:43:26 · answer #5 · answered by mf mf mf mf mf fmf mf mfmfmfmfmf 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I recommend Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus by John Gray. I'm serious! People like to make fun of the book but there's a lot of valid stuff in there! Your boyfriend is probably uncomfortable talking about those types of things, it is not is desire that you should have a bad day.
2006-07-23 08:38:58 · answer #6 · answered by Zarango 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First question--how long have you been dating each other?
You need to communicate how important it is for you to work out your problems with each other before leaving for the day. When I say communicate, I mean speak honestly, calmly, and listen.
Also, find his love language. If you don't want that is, start here: http://www.fivelovelanguages.com/ .
Work together as a couple, not as individuals. If you're commited to this relationship, it will be worth it.
2006-07-23 08:38:14 · answer #7 · answered by FaZizzle 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some mean try to beat around the bush when it comes to talking because sometimes if we do not like the answer that they give us...we may get upset. So they just don't always talk to us. Plus they also may think that you will scold him on whatever the problem is. Men have issues i've noticed. Keep your head up.
2006-07-23 08:37:58 · answer #8 · answered by lovemeacb4e 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Actually they are right. Guys don't like to talk about their feelings. My wife gets pissed at me for the same thing. All I can say is that guys get pissed about stupid stuff, but they usually let it go. At least with me, if I fight with my wife about something, nine times out of ten I can't even remember what we were fighting about then next day. Then we apologize and do the make-up thing. Believe me, if something is really bothering him, he will let you know when the time is right.
2006-07-23 08:41:13 · answer #9 · answered by Danzarth 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk is just that, TALK! Why do women find in necessary to talk everything to death? If you think that there is a problem try and take care of it in your way and see if you can do it without bothering him. Chances are he will be less angry, if he knows that you are not always going to be nagging him.
2006-07-23 08:41:03 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people are like that. I find talking to be very helpful, but when people talk, they have to admit that they made a mistake and apologize and there are just some people who are too self-centered to do that.
If you are not happy with him, break up. There are many fish in the sea, and you can always do better.
Good luck.
2006-07-23 08:36:33 · answer #11 · answered by tiravellian 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋