I met this guy in 2003 and fell inlove. It was a long distance relationship and was going well until a new guy came into town and into mylife early 2005 . The new guy took me by storm and i forgot about that one miles away. For some reason he sensed the affair and decided to pull out and promised to wait. We grew very close with my new lover and became very good friends. I met his kids and relatives and now they adore me. I adore them too but he is cheating now. The thing is, when the going gets tough up there or when the kids want to see me he comes back and apologise. when its over off he goes. I don't love him anymore but feel for the kids. My first boyfriend is still interested and wants to settle down, but the problem is I don't trust any man anymore. what should I do?
2006-07-23 02:10:43 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
get out of the relationship..he's a user and what a prick to put his kids through something like this..he's just going to apoligize over and over till he get's tired of even doing that...
get out...the kids will be ok..kids are tough....you might tell them that you will always be there for them and will be their friend.
give yourself a little time and do some soul searching before jumping into another relationship
2006-07-23 02:15:55 · answer #1 · answered by joschaos 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yea. He has proved his worth by being nice, truthful and patient. Without second thought, settle down with the first boy friend; he has passed in the tough test you and the circumstances subjected him to. He should be suitably rewarded, that is you with your entirety. Do not think that all are alike. There are people to trust with, you have got one now. Join him for a common life together. All the best for both of you!
2006-07-23 02:21:19 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not fair to trust men anymore. That other guy waited for you all this time and now you don't want to trust him for something he didn't do. And you took the chance going out with the other guy and probably hurted the guy waiting for you. You have to at least give him a fair chance after the sacrifice he made, not blame him too cause he's a guy
2006-07-23 02:16:29 · answer #3 · answered by LW 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That first guy sounds like the best bet, although if your heart isn't in a long distance relationship then don't string him on.
Think about it, could you imagine moving to his location or he to yours? If you don't mind giving up what you have where you live now, then give it a go.
As for the second guy he wants his cake as well as scoffing it down happily, so you like his kids, that's natural, that's not a good enough reason to keep messing with yourself and your distance guy, second guy is just not good enough to have you.
As for not trusting men, get over it, I don't trust many men or women but that's for a reason for each of them individually, rather then because one guy screwed you over.
2006-07-23 02:21:12 · answer #4 · answered by hellahulla 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Work on the relationship with the 1st boyfriend. Get rid of the other guy and his family (he is a man that uses people, you don't need that). As for not trusting men, no you are not trusting yourself. Move forward with your life. There will always be men that are "not nice". You just have to get over it.
2006-07-23 02:28:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tyler Perry's "Madea" said it best: "How dare you ask a good man to pay for the mistakes of some sorry fool you had before." ("Madea's Class Reunion" DVD)..."I don't know too many of them that's gonna do it." Sweety, don't punish the good man who loves you. Keep in touch with the kids, but don't allow that to be the baggage that keeps you stuck in a redundant terminal, girlie. You GIVE trust on on INDIVIDUAL basis and only ONLY withdraw it when it is violated. Hope you do the right thing. Love is waiting for you.
2006-07-23 02:22:52 · answer #6 · answered by Sleek 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dump the new bf for sure cuz hes a cheat and is only around when its good for him hes no good 4 u. go with the old bf but build a relationship by being friends first so you can learn to trust him. and then date and just take it slow
2006-07-23 02:19:00 · answer #7 · answered by silver_princess16_03 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i just feel you want to go back to the first guy because it didnt work out with the second guy. the fact that you dont trust men isnt the issue here, to me its the fact that you think you can just jump back in where you left off with the first guy. you cant have loved the first guy if you left him for another.
i think you should forget about both of them and start fresh with someone else.
2006-07-23 02:18:15 · answer #8 · answered by vanessaoz 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u wer in a wrong in the first place to get involved with a married man. secondly if he cheated on u... that doesn`t mean every man is the same. ur long distant bf waited 4 u so long, that means he really loves u....go 4 it. it`s ur good luck. everybody doesn`t get a true love always. accept him or later maybe even he`ll not be there to be with u.
2006-07-23 02:26:11 · answer #9 · answered by ams 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well sounds like guy 1 loves you, dont make the mistake of not trusting him just because 2 was a jerk, and he will cheat again and again
2006-07-23 02:15:23 · answer #10 · answered by arizonaprincess2 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋