What are some pros and cons of "saving it for marriage"?

Question

Some questions I've seen lately have me thinking about it, just curious what others think.

This isn't fishing for advice, I've already been married for 16 years. I'm just curious what people think about it. I can see points on both sides...

Answer 1

sex is the best when it's mixed with love. for me it has nothing to do with marriage.

but ok, i'll try:

Which are no arguments for saving it for marriage:
-no STD's?
Aids can be given from wrong blood-transfusions for example.
That chance is bigger than to get it from safe sex.
-You're sure your partner is the best?
So what? If my girlfriend had better sex before me, then at
least she had that. I'd be happy if she had that, bcs i want her
to have the best. I thought that was wat love was all about.
Given that sex and love belong together, and she loves me the
most, i must probably be the best anyway.

The only reason i can see is a religious reason. If people strongly believe that God or Allah thinks it's better for them to save their body until marriage, then i respect that.

I always saved my body until i felt Love. I was wrong a couple of times, but hey, that's what a few beers can do to a body.

And well, saying it belongs in the wedding-night....i've always heard that most people are too tired after their wedding-day anyway :)
(unless people do a quick wedding in a Vegas Wedding-chappel, of course...but that's sooooooo 80's)

Answer 2

I can't really think of any pros...but I can think of plenty of cons. One is that some people will do other acts that still can result in an STD to avoid actually doing "it." I think saving it until marriage can cause a lot of tension to build up and they could have a lapse of judgment in a weak moment and make a big mistake (like forgetting to use protection). Or they could jump into a marriage they aren't ready for just so they can do it without feeling guilty. I think it's just better for someone to just go for it when they feel they're ready, making sure they take all the proper precautions first.

Answer 3

Pros - It can be a healthy way to go food wise if fed correctly. No salmonella if handled correctly and stored correctly. Cons - Expensive. You really have to buy the prepared raw diets because just throwing raw meat at your dog is not a healthy diet (just giving a dog meat and bones and organs is not sufficient healthwise for your pet and this is the only way it would be financially feasible for most people. A dog eating only meat is like a vegan eating no protein, it is unhealthy). The raw diets that are prepared with vitamins and supplements and veggies are the best but also the most expensive and unless your are rich or have a small dog who doesn't eat much, the price can be high. The reality is there are many kibble and canned diets out there now that are just as healthy as the raw diet. And the people who say the raw diet is how wolves eat in the wild, our dogs are not wolves and have been domesticated for ages of not eating raw meat and bone and organs so it is not natural for them, it is just a choice some owners make. And the more that is learned about the raw diet, less and less vets are recommending it.

Answer 4

the pros would be that the couple has made the act of marriage more sacred....it would be a stronger bond, and "done right". If your just talking about sex then the answer is obvious, sex is overrated...if your marriage is based on sex its already doomed. There are no cons to saving sex until after marriage....the only thing remotely related to a con would be people that want to disprove anything to do with God telling you that your stupid or to imply that somehow sex might be bad with the person and it would be better to find out before marriage ....which would be a complete and utter lie.

Answer 5

Well, saving 'it' for marriage would mean you would not have to worry about your partners sexual history, no STD's. You would not have to worry about running into the ex-girlfriend and having an awkward conversation because they knew each other so intimately and you would not have to introduce you spouse to your past sexual partners and feeling awkward. If you both have no experience you know it would really mean alot to each of you to have made such a commitment to each other. It would be a gift that you could only give once in a lifetime. Don't believe anyone who tells you that you may not be sexually compatible. If you have kissed you know if you are attracted to each other. The rest well it may take time can be worked out in most cases.

I really don't know of any cons. I wish I could tell you there are some draw backs but I have several friends who were virgins on their wedding night and they all seemed to have worked out any kinks rather quickly and are all happy in that area. I know because us girls have gotten together and talked.

Once you have sex with someone you have made a very intimate connection to them that never goes away.

Answer 6

Why save it for marriage.

I, personally, have many reasons, but here's one that I say to EVERYONE:
I am a virgin (& plan to say that way until marriage), & thus I know that the BEST SEX OF MY LIFE will be with my husband & on my wedding night!

Extended argument:
If, before you marry, both you & your spouse have sex with 4 other people besides you. That means there's only a 20% chance that your spouse will be "the best," & a 20% chance that you will be your spouse's "best." What's the chance it will be "the best" for both of you?
Do you like those odds?

Peace!

Answer 7

I can't think of any pros for it at all except it saves "good girls" from that old catholic guilt syndrome.
Cons ? Imagine getting into bed on your wedding night and finding he is impotent. Has a weeny one, hasn't a clue what he's doing, is just plain bad at sex. ewwww.

I'm a firm believer in the "try before you buy" theory.

Answer 8

Pros: You won't bring any STDs into the marriage to infect your husband and possible children.
You won't have any pregnancies outside of marriage.
Sex unites two people physically, spiritually and emotionally. It is not just a physical act. Would you want to go into a marriage being spiritually united with another? It is the greatest gift you can give your new husband, him knowing he is your one true love and that he is not sharing you with another.

Cons: Can't think of any

Answer 9

A pro for saving it for marriage is that it gives an extra bond with the person you choose to marry that is something that you have shared with them and them alone. A con is that it hurts the first time so it kind of makes the honey moon stink

Answer 10

I am in favor of saving it for your wedding night.

Whenever you have a sexual partner, you give part of yourself to him or her, so that when you finally marry, you will be unable to love your spouse with your whole heart. There is a very close bond with the person who was "the first" one that you had sex with. It is a very special gift for your spouse. Even if the person who takes your virginity is the person that you marry, you won't have anything very special reserved for the wedding night.

My first wife had had several sexual contacts before we met, but we were never able to have a close bond between us. My current wife was a 29 year old virgin, and the closeness that we have is unbreakable. I can only imagine how much better it could be if I had saved myself for her.

Answer 11

Pros: A nice surprise for your future husband on your wedding night, when you don't know what you like and how to please yourself or him!

Con: Odds are you'll cheat on your S.O., as you've never been with anyone else, and curisoity about what it's like with another person gets the best of you. Your first time with the person you love will be brief and weird.

Seriously: Saving it for marriage is a mistake. Find a guy/girl you like, who's clean, and who you'd enjoy, and learn before you spend the rest of your life with someone

Added Bonus: If you have lots of sex, it doesn't become as important in a relationship, since it loses its mystique. That means when you find someone you love,it'll be for love, not horniness. In other words, you marry your love, not someone you wanna do it with.

Double Bonus: By being smart and responsible with safe sex, you actually LEARN good contraceptive means, unlike those who fear sex and thus never learn the benefits of a condom, for themselves and their future children.

Edited to add: For those who say being a virgin guarntees the best sex of your life your first time... yeah. Right. Trust me, it won't be. Do yourself a favor. Get it over with and learn what you like, instead of being holier then thou. You AND your future mate will thank you for it.