2006-07-22 07:34:45 · 12 answers · asked by dermisil 2 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Yes I do.
2006-07-22 07:38:31 · answer #1 · answered by The Hit Man 6 · 3⤊ 2⤋
Sure, Check this out:
The husband leans over and asks his wife, "Do you remember the first time we had sex together over fifty years ago? We went behind this very tavern where you leaned against the back fence and I made love to you."
Yes, she says, "I remember it well."
Okay, he says, "How about taking a stroll around there again and we can do it for old times sake?"
She says, "Oh Charlie, you old devil, that sounds like a crazy, but very good idea!
There's a police officer sitting in the next booth listening to all this, and having a chuckle to himself.
He thinks, "I've got to see these two old-timers having sex against a fence. I'll just keep an eye on them so there's no trouble." So he follows them.
They walk haltingly along, leaning on each other for support, aided by walking sticks.
Finally they get to the back of the tavern and make their way to the fence.
The old lady lifts her skirt and the old man drops his trousers.
As she leans against the fence, the old man moves in.
Suddenly they erupt into the most furious sex that the watching policeman has ever seen.
This goes on for about 10 minutes. Finally, they both collapse panting on the ground.
The policeman is amazed. He thinks he has learned something about life that he didn't know.
After about half an hour of lying on the ground recovering, the old couple struggle to their feet and put their clothes back on.
The policeman, still watching thinks, this was truly amazing. I've got to ask them what their secret is.
As the couple passes, he says to them, "Excuse me, but that was something else. You must have had a fantastic sex life together. Is there some sort of secret to this?"
The old man says, "Fifty years ago that wasn't an electric fence."
2006-07-22 07:50:14 · answer #2 · answered by ♥Gilmore♥ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The Hunchback of Notre Dame had heard a lot about sex, so one night he decided to venture out onto the streets of Paris to look for a hooker.
He walked for hours until he found the darkest, poorest street haunted by whores desperate for money. He made an arrangement with one, dropped his pants and went to work.
The hooker tried shutting her eyes and pretending her john was normal. But she made the mistake of opening her eyes. One look at the Hideous man ******* her and she vomited all over him.
The hunchback stopped and asked, "Are you sick?"
"Yes," she stammered.
"Good," he said. "For a minute, I thought I'd busted my hump."
2006-07-22 09:23:48 · answer #3 · answered by trueair01 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Grandpa
A grandson came to visit his grandparents and noticed his grandfather sitting on the porch in the rocker, wearing only a shirt, naked from
the waist down.
"Grandpa, whatcha' doing? You're weenie's out in the wind for all to see!" he exclaimed.
Grandpa looked off in the distance, not answering.
"Grandpa, whatcha' doin' sitting out here with nothing on below the waist?" he asked again.
Grandpa looked at him and said, "Last week I sat here with no shirt on and got a stiff neck.
This is grandma's idea..."
2006-07-22 11:55:10 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
a teacher was giving her students a test.she would give them a piece of candy and the had to guess the flavor.the kids had been getting all the flavors right until the teacher gave them a honey flavored piece of candy.nobody knew what the flavor was.so,the teacher gave them a hint:"it's what your mom calls your dad in the morning."then one kid spit his out and said"guys spit it out it's an asshole
2006-07-22 07:46:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Theres a mirror in my bathroom every time i look into it it cracks me up
you should try it too
2006-07-26 04:08:21 · answer #6 · answered by itsa o 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here's a good one a friend sent me today!
http://mywebpages.comcast.net/singingman7777/Beginning.htm
2006-07-22 09:08:02 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What's black and white and dead all over?
Written instructions on how to properly conduct a funeral
2006-07-22 07:38:08 · answer #8 · answered by Blue Rose Thorn 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl-"mommy! mommy i got five dollars!"
Mom-"Where did u get that money from?"
Girl-"from billy down the street!"
Mom-"how did u get it?"
Girl-"billy sat on top of a tree and watched me do cartwheels"
M0m-"you know he only wants to see your panties"
Girl-"OOOOOOOHHHHHH"
<------------1 WEEK LATER------------->
Girl-"mommy! mommy! i got ten dollars!"
Mom-"i thought i told u to stay away from him?"
Girl-"dont worry mommy i tricked him, this time i didnt wear any!"
Mom- O_O!
2006-07-22 07:50:01 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
what does micheal jordan and micheal jackson have in common? they both play in the minor leagues!! haha!!
2006-07-22 07:38:40 · answer #10 · answered by sarah p 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah,1 for us girls;why do men prefer to marry virgins??? you cant stand criticism!!! Julie.x.
2006-07-22 08:18:37 · answer #11 · answered by honey-bunny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋