ladies have you had a bad labour?

Question

i have 3 children aged 9 years and 4 years and a boy 8 months the first labour was really easy she was premature second labour was painfull she was full term but my 3 rd everyone said how easy it would be i had a really bad time i was in hell normally on my 2 children before the most painfull part was pushing but on my 3rd it was the most intense contractions they were really bad i was screaming the place down ive never had any pain releif except gas and air as it was to late for me i even woke up in night sweating from dreaming about my experiance i had with my little boy now i dont think i could ever go through this again something wasnt right has any one else had bad experiances with there 2nd or 3rd

Answer 1

I've never had an easy time with delivery, after 4 children have never once gone into labor on my own and always had to be induced between 41 and 42 weeks. My 2nd child however, came with a HORRIBLE birth experience. I was 42 weeks, scheduled to be induced the following morning when my doctor -without asking or telling me first- stripped my membranes during the office visit. I went home and got packed for the next morning, took a nap, and woke up with what felt like a screwdriver stuck at the base of my spine. That pain would come and go with great intensity but it wasn't until several hours later that I realized I was probably in labor. (water didn't break, had no strong contractions, just this indescribable back pain.) When we got to the hospital that evening the first thing we did was request the epidural. Our nurse said, "She's already dilated to a 6, it will take an hour for the anesthesiologist to get here and by then it may be too late." Translation: She didn't want to have to stay in the room and monitor the drip. She never even called the doctor on call to ask him. From 10 that night until 5:23 the next morning I was in excruciating pain, I mean, pain so bad I couldn't even do anything except sit straight up in bed and cling to the railing and openly weep. When the doctor came in, he wasn't my doctor and he wasn't the doctor scheduled to do the induction and I'd only seen him once during my pregnancy. He was in a bad mood, had a c-section coming up in an hour and was one of those "old timers" who wanted me to lay down flat and and deliver the baby and of course, as bad as the back pain was, laying flat on my back was 1000 times worse. I completely lost it. They probably heard me screaming two states away. No epidural, no demerol to take the edge off, it was so painful it was nearly surreal. I could hear a woman screaming but couldn't connect that the woman was me. My husband was sobbing because he'd never seen anyone in that much pain and felt completely helpless to do anything. My son finally arrived, having been turned around the wrong way which was why I was having what they call, "back labor" and his face was unbelievably bruised. In addition, I lost a ton of blood and had several other problems -like they couldn't get the bleeding stopped- and it was a nightmare. Afterwards I felt completely traumatized by the whole experience. I wound up talking to the doctor on my post-partum visit who was scheduled to induce me and he said (quietly of course) that what I described shouldn't have happened, and for me to contact the hospital because the problem started with the nurse. I did that and the supervisor told me that particular nurse was fired after three weeks in L&D of work for similar complaints. She apologized profusely. But like you, I also had nightmares and somehow felt ashamed, like it was my fault I lost it in the delivery room. I didn't think I could go through anything like that ever again and didn't want to risk it. A couple of years went by and I told another doctor who happened to be a friend of ours what had happened to me. He suggested I switch to another ob/gyn practice that one of his friends had recently opened. I did that and the doctor there turned out to be Canadian and very "mother/women's issues-centered." When I became pregnant with my 3rd child I told him the whole story of #2 and he hugged me, told me how sorry he was because birth should be a more peaceful, less painful experience with people who care about you and promised me that would never happen to me again. My 3rd child was HUGE but just as he promised, I had my epidural before I ever started hurting. When #4 was born, I had to have a c-section but this same doctor was fantastic. Very sensitive, very personal, it's the best care I've ever had in my life.

My advice? Get another doctor who is sensitive to your experience and flexible with pain management. We learned the hard way that speaking up, not being afraid to make a switch, is what we needed to do to get better care. And no, I've never noticed a difference in any of my 4 children in terms of "alertness" after having no pain meds for the first two and being given pain meds for the 2nd two and I'm not convinced that "all natural" is the way to go although that's fine if one chooses it and is blessed with good inner structure to deliver without too much trauma or lengthy labor which is a factor in why many women opt for pain management assistance. All 4 were healthy, happy, easy children but the 2nd two deliveries were like a religious experience because there was much more attention paid to my pain and to me. Good luck.

Answer 2

My 2nd was far worse than my first. With my 2nd everything went too fast and I hyperventilated and vomitted. I couldn't control my breathing at all b/c the contractions were so intense and so close together . I went from 1cm to 3cm in an hour... 3cm to 8 cm in 30 minutes and at 10 till 12 they said I was 8 cm , 80% efaced and the baby hadn't dropped yet suddenly 10 minutes later he was crowning. It was really bad. He was 6 weeks early and only weighed 5 pounds. I only had to push for about 10 minutes and the hardest part there was waiting for them to get ready for the delivery and get the doctor BUT everything leading up to that was hell.

Answer 3

I have two so far and one on the way, my first child was 5 hours and pretty easy labor, my second child was an hour long but a little rough. She came out so fast that the cord was wrapped around her neck although everything came out fine with her just bruising throughout her body. I am really scared about this one that is due in Aug. I feel that this one is going to be my worst just because i feel that my labors have been pretty easy. Also this pregnancy has been rougher then my other too also.

Answer 4

I felt that my second was much more difficult than the first. I felt traumatized about that birth. The contractions were intensely painful, and I never really got the urge to push...just more pain. I did have some nightmares about it for a while afterwards, but they eventually went away. I haven't had any more children, but I'm not sure it's just about the labor.

Answer 5

my second delivery was also bad. i started labor on sunday anddidnt have him til saturday they kept stopping the contractions, i was miserable. on friday i asked my hubby to stay home from wrok the contraction were 30-45 minutes apart. as the dat went on they got closer, at 5pm we called my doctor i intenonally waited on the clinic to close. but now i was 7-8 minutes a part . i couldnt even talk to my doctor. my hubby did. well i got to the hospital and was hooked up to an iv and given pitocinthis made my contractions unbearable. i asked for drugs they gave me nubaintwice this didnot help at all. it just let me sleep for half an hour. at 3am my doctor broke my water. he spent the whole night at the hospital with me. he slept in the hurses lounge. well they finally gave me an epidural. too late. after i got it my doctor checked me i was fully dilated and ready to push i pushed for 2 and half hours to no avail. at that point they decided to do a c-section i wasnt asked i was told. i was wheeled into surgery at noon. my son was born at 12:59pm. 37 hours from the time i felt the first real contraction the day before. i went into the hospital almost 5 cms dilated. it was a good thing they did the c-section. my son had the cord around his neck twice and his waist. i also had to have emergency surgery on my bladder to repair a tear i got during my labor from being cathefrized improperly

Answer 6

I have one little girl, 4 years old. I delivered her by choice no drugs. It was an awing and amazing experience. I understand that most women would not choose to do this, I did not want to give birth to a drugged up baby. I'm sure you noticed the difference between the alertness of your boy compared to your girls. I do not plan on using any drugs during any future pregnancies if I choose to have more children, either.

Answer 7

MY FIRST TIME IT WAS A PIECE OF CAKE I WAS IN LABOR FOR ABOUT 21 HOURS BUT I NEVER FELT A THING AND THE ONLY THING I HAD WAS DEMEROL AND I DIDN'T RECEIVE THAT UNTIL THE 19TH HOUR.NOW WITH MY SECOND ONE I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO DIE,THE CONTRACTIONS WERE SO BAD I STAYED IN A FETUS POSITION BECAUSE EVERY TIME I MOVED IT FELT LIKE MY ORGANS WERE MOVING AROUND.WHICH MADE IT HARD FOR MY MIDWIFE TO CHECK ME AND IT WAS JUST THE WORST LABOR EVER AND IT ONLY LASTED ABOUT 7 HOURS.BUT AS ALWAYS IT'S WORTH IT.

Answer 8

Ah, yes, Dr. Julie? Hi, I was calling to let you know that I change my mind on the natural labor. Yeah, um, I'll have the epidural. Ok, thankyou, bye.

Answer 9

no i thought my 2nd was easier now i look back,but my partner says i didnt say so at the time,he said i said "this is the worst ever" so dont worry love,time heals and you got a lovely baby now

Answer 10

I have 2 boys and my second one was easier then my first