I'm feeling lonely can anyone cheer me up?

Question

Thankyou

Answer 1

As a new, young MD doing his residency in OB, I was quite
embarrassed when performing female pelvic exams. To cover my
embarrassment I had unconsciously formed a habit of whistling softly.
The middle-aged lady upon whom I was performing this exam suddenly burst out laughing and further embarrassing me. I looked up from my work and sheepishly said, "I’m sorry. Was I tickling you?" She replied, "No doctor, but the song you were whistling was, "I wish I was an Oscar Meyer Wiener".

Answer 2

Cowboy Logic


A few years ago, the Sierra Club and the US Forest Service were presenting an alternative to Montana ranchers for controlling the coyote population.

It seems that after years of the ranchers using the tried and true methods of shooting and/or trapping the predator, the tree-huggers had a "more humane" solution.

What the Sierra Club proposed was for the animals to be captured alive, the males castrated and let loose again, and the population would be controlled.

All of the ranchers mulled over this 'amazing' idea for a couple of minutes.

Finally, an old boy in the back stood up, tipped his hat back, and said, "Son, I don't think you understand the problem. Those coyotes ain't ******' our sheep - they're eatin' 'em."

Answer 3

three guys go five stories up to a bar.an american.a chinese man.and a mexican.they all order pinacoladas then the bartender tells them that if they drink at least 1 of them,rub the window, and jump out of it,they will become whatever they say they want 2 b.
they dont believe him so they ask if ne1 esle would do it someone do and said i want to b an eagle and he turned into an eagle and flew away.all of 3 them were amazed but the american and the mexican thought it was just a trick and they bought more drink each but the chinese man believed it so he rubbed the window and jumped out he said "i want to b a beautiful falcon."and he sure enough became a 1.the mexican and american became even more amazed but the american still thought it was some kind of trick and the american ordered another drink, but the mexican believed it to b true.so he jumped out and said "ey holmes i wanna b a dove"then he was and flew away the american was very drunk now and he thought it 2 b true so he rubbed the window and fell out the window and screamed "o **** "and guess what happened next.

Answer 4

Check this out.....

One day there is this guy walking in the park. He sees a rusty old lamp on the ground. He picks it up and sees some writing on the lamp. He starts wiping off the lamp and all of the sudden smoke starts coming out of the lamp and surrounds him. A genie appears and tells him " You have 3 wishes of any kind but there is a stipulation, your worst enemy will receive double what you get." The man says ok my 1st wish is for 100 million dollars. The Genie said ok but remember your worst enemy now has 200 million dollars. OK said the guy. Next wish for a mansion on the most clearest beach. The genie then says but remember then the man interrupted and said i know i have 1 and he has 2. Then all the sudden he is in his beach mansion with the 100 million. For my final wish I wish for you to beat me half to death.

Answer 5

A man walks into a bar with a paper bag. He sits down
and places the bag on the counter.

The bartender walks up and asks what's in the bag.

The man reaches into the bag and pulls out a little
man, about one foot high and sets him on the counter.
He reaches back into the bag and pulls out a small
piano, setting it on the counter as well. He then
pulls out a tiny piano bench, which he places in
front of the piano.

The little man sits down at the piano and starts
playing a beautiful piece by Mozart!

"Where on earth did you get that?" says the bartender.

The man responds by reaching into the paper bag. This
time he pulls out a magic lamp. He hands it to the
bartender and says: "Here. Rub it."

So the bartender rubs the lamp, and suddenly there's a
gust of smoke and a beautiful genie is standing before
him.

"I will grant you one wish. Just one wish. Each person
is only allowed one!"

The bartender gets real excited.

Without hesitating he says, "I want a million bucks!"

A few moments later, a duck walks into the bar. It is
soon followed by another duck, then another. Pretty
soon, the entire bar is filled with ducks and they
keep coming!

The bartender turns to the man and says, "Y'know, I
think your genie's a little deaf. I asked for a
million bucks, not a million ducks."

"Tell me about it!" says the man, "do you really
think I asked for a 12 inch pianist?"
;)

Answer 6

eat your beans the magical fruit the more ya eat the more ya toot the more ya eat the better ya feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee so lets eat beans at every meal there onse was a guy who did this and be came a smoking hobo without a girl friend

Answer 7

Hey Anakin! Cheer up! :) It's not the end of the world ya know..

Answer 8

I'm driving along at 70 miles an hour (the speed limit), minding my own business, when out of nowhere there's this big crack in my windscreen!!





I swerved right, and then left, and it was still right there!!

Answer 9

put a smile on! smile smile smile! be glad you're living, and be glad you have the things you do! smile smile smile, remember that there are people who are less fortunate than you smile sweetheart smile! have an awesomely awesome day sweetiepie check ya later ♥

Answer 10

Do as i instruct you along this letter. i will make you in to a special state of your mind and chear you up.

step 1:-
now close your eyes
STEP 2
read folowing

i am being cheared up....i am being cheared up....i am being cheared up....i am being..... HAY YOU ARE NOT FOLLOWING MY INSTRUCTIONS HOW CAN I HELP. I ASKED YOU TO CLOSE YOUR EYES THEN HOW CAN YOU READ THIS