My fiance" treated me like crap a few days ago over a stupid issue which I had no control over. Our dog ate the pool hoses that fed into the pool pump! Luckily it was fixable for less than $30. But it was at that time all my fault because the dog was a dog he bought for me. Of course he felt bad about it " after the fact"! But today he goes out and spends $400 on a gold necklace for me and then takes me out to an unexpected evening. Now mind you, I have never been one to have gifts reaped upon me so this was rather flattering. But I also do not want to give the impression that an gift or a night on the town will soothe the hurt feelings either! So ... pray tell... what would be the best way to handle this without making him feel that he is" Buying my love"? I am not a monitary type person at all! How do yu tell a guy he does not have to buy your love? And really make him believe it?
2006-07-21 21:06:52 · 8 answers · asked by Fancygal 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He just might not have the talent (or skill) to attract you naturally, without spending.
That's his way of showing you his affection and that he doesn't want to lose you.
Be direct to him - he'll like it and come to his senses.
2006-07-21 21:12:51 · answer #1 · answered by val 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really want him to believe it, don't get too attached to that necklace. He is trying to test if he can behave abominably and unfairly to you, and then buy his 'get out of jail free' card. I would wrap the necklace back up, and include a note with it. Tell him in no uncertain terms that his behavior was unacceptable, the bribe even less so, since all the money in the world can't erase the hurt his outburst caused you. If you don't set your boundaries, he will do it again, and again... You might end up having lots of jewelery, but unhappy too if this continues. Nip it in the bud.
2006-07-22 04:19:38 · answer #2 · answered by ladybugewa 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When they smother you with 'presents' after a bout of feeling guilty, just remind him that though you love the gift, all he had to do was apologize. And follow it up with kisses. So next time he has the 'guilt' feeling he will do both and you will know he's not trying to 'buy your love'.
But no matter, if you love him, let might let it slide for a couple of times. A nice gift always is a good surprise.
2006-07-22 04:13:22 · answer #3 · answered by kazoo1991 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That depends, if you can afford to buy her, why not. I know she'll understand if you can't give her expensive jewelries. What's important is your love and your relationship are still intact not basing on monetary aspects. I never bought my girlfriend from webdate_dot_com expensive ones not to make her feel I can bought her the same at all time.
2006-07-22 04:28:46 · answer #4 · answered by edz1624 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Easy. Don't ever use or wear his gifts, not the dog of course, you must love the dog.
Then he will know he can't buy your love with money.
2006-07-22 04:14:05 · answer #5 · answered by Bigfoot 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Act supprised and delighted, but don't show any signs that he's solved anything with this diversion.
2006-07-22 04:12:35 · answer #6 · answered by Bush Whacker 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just be like" sweetie honestly a sorry is all i needed, you dont need to go out and buy me thing and take me places, im happy with just being with you and you being yourself. i dont need anyting else"
2006-07-22 04:11:14 · answer #7 · answered by jess_huh 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him: exactly that.......why wont people realise life aint a game say what you need to say!
2006-07-22 04:11:47 · answer #8 · answered by xxx P 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋