Why are people so uptight about women breastfeeding in public or breastfeeding a child that is over 1 1/2 old?

Question

I believe in breastfeeding. I just don't understand people thinking that it is dirty or gross that women breastfeed their babies in public. What do you think women have breasts for? It is to feed their babies. I tried to cover my self up in public and found it was a pain in the neck so I just lifted my shirt up enough so that my son could latch on. You didn't really see anything.
The other thing is what is the big deal if you nurse your child for over a 1 1/2 years?? My son will be 3 on the 17th of next month. And until 3 months ago I was still nursing him. He weaned him self off of me. Yes, he was able to use a sippy and could eat soild foods but, he still wanted that "cuddle" time with Mama. And yes he could ask for it. All he would have to say is " Mama, drink Bee-boobs Please!" ( Bee-boob's is his word for my breasts) and depending on where we were he would go ahead and unsnap my nursing bra and start to nurse. It was a wonderful bonding time for us.

What is so wrong with it. He is very healthy and happy. I want to give him the best in life and I know that breast milk is the best food in the world.
And the only reason he stoped was that, I think he knew that something was up with my body. A week after he weaned off of me I found out I am pregnant with our 2nd child. I will breastfeed this child until he/she doesn't want to nurse anymore. If that means that they are 3 years old that is just fine with me.

I enjoyed nursing my son. We are so bonded with each other. And my "Bee-boos" are still his friends. He still uses them for comfort when he needs them. Meaning he will cuddle up to them.

PS- That is my son in my picture taken in March 2006.

Answer 1

More women breast feed toddlers than most people realize. They learn to do it privately and be careful to only tell people they can trust to be supportive. There is nothing wrong with letting a child self wean(OK,coming home from school for a snack IS probably a bit long) Some children will self wean at 12-15 months while others will nurse till 3 or 4. Past the age of 12-15 months it isn't about food, it's about bonding and closness.I had a patient whose first baby was still nursing at 13 months who came to me in tears when she discoved she was unintentionally pregnant. She had hoped to continue nursing till her daughter was at least 2 but everyone, including a doctor she saw,told her she couldn't nurse and be pregnant. I worked with her to optimize her diet and she nursed her daughter till the baby was born. The little girl only nursed a few times afterward by her own choice and seemed content to watch her baby brother nurse.As far as nursing in public, a lot of people,men and women, can't get past the breasts as sex organs and breastfeeding as sexual.If a woman admits that there definitely is a sensuality to nursing she may be denounced as perverted.The prejudice against nursing an older child is much stronger if the child is a boy. Talk about perverted!!Good for you for doing what has been best for you and your child. Enjoy that special time with your new little person.

Answer 2

Sometimes, I think people are upset because they are so uncomfortable with the human body. Some see the breasts as just sexual objects and not as the "feeding stations" nature intended. Some have been brainwashed by formula peddlers and uptight people passing on their bias. Maybe some are just jealous. And still others are trying to justify their choice to deny their children breast milk by bashing those who do nurse.

In other cultures, breastfeeding goes on for years. Part of the problem is cultural. My own mother had been conditioned to think formula was more "modern" and somehow "nicer" than nursing. How they got women to buy that is a mystery to me. All that hassle she went through mixing milk and special syrups and sterilizing and warming and cleaning bottles seemed really idiotic to me next to the simplicity of opening my shirt and feeding.

If a toddler is otherwise doing everything toddlers should do, what is the problem with nursing? Most will wean themselves. (One of mine also weaned herself when I became pregnant.)

Some women can't or shouldn't nurse and some few babies have special needs (like PKU or galactosemia) but on the whole breastfeeding is vastly superior for mother and baby. Those who whine about breastfeeding are the ones who actually have the problems.

And while we're on the subject, I am disgusted by those who suggest that nursing mothers should shield their delicate eyes by feeding babies in toilets. A toilet stall is not the best place to feed anyone! Why don't these pathetic people go hide in a john when they see "horrible" nursing?

I'm glad you asked the question. While being tolerant of others choices in childrearing is one thing, pretending that there is anything wrong with breastfeeding is the really sick point of view. It's time for the normal people to speak out, for the sake of the babies if for no other reason.

Answer 3

Congrats to you for being able to nurse your son for so long. You've given him a wonderful start in life!

All three of my children have nursed long term. My oldest weaned when he was 3.5 years. My middle was almost 2 years old. My youngest is 3.5 years and still nursing. I nursed through my 2nd and 3rd pregnancies. #1 and #2 tandem nursed for 16 months, but #2 weaned before #3 was born.

I love telling people that Michael Jordan was breastfed until he was 3 years old!

Most women who are nursing in public show LESS breast than what you see at a swimming pool or on a music video.

fandj4ever - Please cite the studies you mentioned that say there is no nutritional benefit for older children. What do you think, that it turns to water or something?

OF COURSE there is a still a nutritional benefit to it! Sure, they don't take as much milk when they are 3 years old as they do when they are 3 months old...but it still has nutritional value and provides immunities. That's like saying that when they are a baby and you feed them a jar of applesauce, it has nutritional benefit BUT when they get older and they are eating more foods, giving them a single apple has no benefit. Breastfeeding is just ONE PART of their whole diet, just like anything else that they eat. It ALL contributes to good nutrition.

"Parents and health professionals need to recognize that the benefits of breastfeeding (nutritional, immunological, cognitive, emotional) continue as long as breastfeeding itself does, and that there never comes a point when you can replace breast milk with infant formula, cows' milk or any other food, or breastfeeding with a pacifier or teddy bear, without some costs to the child."

-- KA Dettwyler, "Beauty and the Breast" from Breastfeeding: Biocultural Perspectives, 1995, p. 204.

Adam_Squires - If you think breastfeeding mothers should feed their children in the bathroom, why don't you eat your next meal in there?

Answer 4

I am breastfeeding my 9month old daughter. I breastfeed her 3 older brothers till they were around 15 to 18 months old. I don't see what wrong with feeding in public. I think the people who have a problem with it then don't look. I cover up when in public. But even that "offends" some. I say GET OVER IT! they are big girls and boys, find something else to focus on instead of us doing the natural thing of feeding our children. I dare someone to ever tell me to stop feeding my little girl. I will not go to a restroom to feed her. They dont eat in there, why should I make her. Half the time, when women are feeding you can't even tell. I dont say flop it out for everyone to see, thats not appropriate but being discrete about it is fine. I believe that where every I am allowed to be, my baby is allowed to breastfeed.

Answer 5

I really do not have a problem with it. My mother did not breastfeed any of my brothers or myself. I try with my son but it unfortunate did not work out. I personally think it is important to teach your children abt adult things so they can come to you when they are older when they have questions.

My son came in the bathroom one day and said what is that (he is almost 3) I explained that it is mommies period. He of course said no it is not you went poopy in your pants so for the next few days he kept saying that I went poopy in my pant every time I went to the bathroom. I corrected him each time. The following month when this all started again (like it always does) He came in the bathroom and said "Oh Mommies got her period." My husband asked "should you be teaching him that?" I said "why not?"

When my husband was a child of 10 his mother would just point to the box of maxi pads and say I need these and he went to the store and got them with out a problem.

I think that breastfeeding is a normal and wonderful thing. I wish I would have been able to breastfeed my son but I hope I found others ways to bond. I think we would have bonded more if I would have been able too.

If my son ever wants to know what a women is doing breastfeeding I will just explain it to him and hope he understands. He will understand after awhile.

Go ahead and breast feed. I do not find it offensive. If other people do and say something to you that is sad that their parents did not raise them that they could come to them with anything.

Answer 6

Congratulations on breastfeeding for so long. My 11-month-old nurses around 20 times a day and I plan on letting her continue as long as she wants. It's up to us to educate society and hopefully by the time our children are breastfeeding their kids there won't be any issue to nursing in public.

The human body is designed to take in milk for up to seven years. And YES, some people do nurse that long--there's nothing wrong with it. That's what breasts are MADE for DUH! After a certain age (4-7 years usually) the human body stops producing lactase. Once this happens it can no longer digest lactose the primary milk sugar. So it stands to reason that children are designed to be nursed for at least a few years. You can't even digest cow's milk beyond that point (not properly anyway), yet people see nothing wrong with feeding a child something that came out of a farm animal's booby. Nobody considers an udder to be a sexual object I guess LOL.

Answer 7

okay one there is nothing wrong with breast feeding in Public.
now about doing it until there are 3 I personally feel that's wrong, studies have show that there is NO nutritional value to it after a year old. and Come on now you really thought it was okay for your 3 year old son to ask when you are in Public breastfeed, and you just whipped it out like it was no Problem? he DOESN'T need it, he is old enough to feed himself and use the bathroom on his own, what if he didn't stop until he was 5 still no problem? You should stop when there is no more Nutritional value or at least stop when the kid can ask for it, that's just weird

Answer 8

I agree that society is ridiculous when it comes to the breast-feeding issue. A mothers breasts are FOR that purpose. Doesn't bother ME to see a mother nursing and in fact it's nice to see that she is doing what is natural.
Much of society associates the breast with sex and it's ridiculous. It can definately be for sexual pleasure or even comfort with your partner but there is nothing "sexy" when it comes time to nurse your child.
Nothing wrong with nursing for several years either. Even from 2- 4 years of age they'll only nurse once in a while for the comfort. It's not 15 times a day like an infant.
Good Grief.... I'm PRO NURSING all the way....... Those who attach a negative stigma to nursing simply put that upon themselves because they don't know how to think for themselves. Instead they allow another ignorant societal wave make their choices.
A mother SHOULDN'T hide away in bathroom or corner to nurse her child. Don't you think that makes it appear as though something might not be alright with feeding a child?

Thank Goodness tribal Africans don't put such an ignorant stigma upon nursing or we'd have even more babies starving....

Answer 9

the whole "No nutritonal value after x age" argument is unfounded and wrong. do you really think that the composition of mother's milk just stops producing nutrional substances after 12 months? or 18? or 60? The longer you breastfeed, the more concentrated the natural antibodies and nutrients become because the child tends to breastfeed less.

congrats on breastfeeding this long and don't let other's ignorance keep you from providing your child with the food made specifically for them for as long as you and your son feel comfortable.

Answer 10

I breastfeed, but am Muslim. God tells us to not uncover ourselves in public, so I nurse in my bedroom. When we have company over, and we have it every day, I nurse in my bedroom. I, too, believe that nursing is a beutiful thing. My child doesn't know my breasts by a name like yours, we just say milk or eat. I am teaching my children beutiful things, and love sharing bonding time, but that is special and not for the rest of the world, only for us.