Every time my son goes to his grandma's when his cousin is down from Arkansas he comes back acting like a little jerk, it takes me a good week to deprogram this behavior! His cousin is 4 years older than him and is an only child his mother doesn't dissapline him and he leans on this idea that he has ADD and he uses that as an excuse for the way he acts and when my son comes home he is acting just like him! What can I do to make this stop, right now he's in his room crying because I bought tan carpet and he doesnt like brown he wanted grey!!What do I do other than spanking him!! He's starting to get out of control with even the smallest of things!!Help,please!
2006-07-21 16:15:38 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
My son is 8.
2006-07-21 16:24:02 · update #1
you are probley a great mother but spanking works a lot of parents feel that it is a bad thing to spank there kids it is not you are helping your kid learn that for his or her actions there is a spanking coming after it ity really helps out in the long run when you spank them you here yes mam, no mam you dont you here what and no
2006-07-21 17:52:39 · answer #1 · answered by eazygangsta573 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
How old is he?
I would say that it is simply thinking that his older cousin is so cool and wanting to be like him. I have dealt with this in my 5 year old son. The best thing I have found is to make it quite clear while we are around the bad influence that I don't approve of that type of behavior. That can get tricky around family however because you may not want to look directly at your sibling and say to your child, "don't act like Bobby, Bobby is being a jerk!" (Might not go over well with Bobby's folks) I also try to set clear rules for my son before we are in a situation like that. I tell him that at Grandma's house we are not allowed to run, scream, or hit.
As far as teh carpet goes, I would think that he just wants to feel in control, which is normal. Tell him this time that you chose the carpet because it is your house, but maybe let him help pick something else for the house. Good luck.
(Oh yah, psychologist and research have shown that spanking and other corparal punishment does NOTHING to change behavior. Kudos for trying to find another method!!!)
2006-07-21 16:28:42 · answer #2 · answered by averyanne77 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would never recommend spanking but you know your child best. If spanking isn't working thus far it probably won't any time soon. I suggest taking away priviledges. Find out what's important to him and let him know that his behavior is unacceptable and if he continues he'll lose "xyz" for "X amount of time". Even permantly if you have to. Stay consistent - whatever you do. He has to know what's coming if he acts a certain way.
You could also limit the time spent w/ this cousin (that's really what I'd do) if he isn't grasping the consequences of his behavior.
2006-07-21 16:20:43 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats pretty normal just ignore him im 13 i spend 2 months of the summer in TX with my dad then i go back to AR and i have the biggest attitude twords my mom. its normal but since he is crying then he might make a big sceen in public just dont bring him into public for a few days or just not for a long time.
talk to him softly when he gets done crying about what he is doing
GOOD LUCK !!!
2006-07-21 16:30:09 · answer #4 · answered by hooter1315 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find his price. For example, with my kids, if they act up, they become unplugged. No TV, no PS2, no gameboy SP's and I let them decide when they get it back. In order to get replugged in, they need to be good and respectful to everyone in the house. It can take a couple of days to earn things back, but it also makes them think about being naughty the next time.
2006-07-21 16:24:17 · answer #5 · answered by fennamason 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't give an age for your son, so I would say that he is use to getting his way and rebels when he doesn't and grandma lets him do the same.
2006-07-21 16:22:05 · answer #6 · answered by D L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like he is testing his boundaries..... you remain firm and consistant..... all his life growing up he will find other people to emulate... some things you will like, but most you wont.... its all a part of our learning curve... your son emulates his cousin because one) he is older therefore he "knows" more and two) he sees how he manipulates his way around so he (your son) wants that too...
all you can do is to continue to teach him what your rules are... and be consistant with it, next thing you know he'll find another person to emulate....
dont worry.... eventually they do grow up.. ;)
2006-07-21 16:21:46 · answer #7 · answered by Resasour 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow that is a hard one! just show him all the love you can even when he is acting out(iknow easier said then done sometimes) and he will come around
2006-07-21 16:21:15 · answer #8 · answered by mom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well tell him if hes gonna come back from grandma's being bad then he cant go there anymore , simple as that
2006-07-21 16:30:34 · answer #9 · answered by jojo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
limit the time he spends at Granny's house when other child is there and why don't you try supervising when both children are together?
2006-07-21 16:56:43 · answer #10 · answered by Moo moo I'm a chicken 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋