I was having an.... intimate session... with my wife, when my daughter aparently got frightened by the thunderstorm rumbling away outside.
When I looked up I saw her standing there with tears in her eyes.
Every time I try to talk to her about it, she shakes her head and tells me that she doesn't want me hurting mommy anymore.
How do I get through this in a ration manner?
2006-07-21 12:11:48 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Have your wife explain that Daddy wasn't hurting Mommy and that she would never let that happen. Let her reassure your daughter that everyone in the family is safe and will continue to be safe because you all love each other. If your daughter is curious as to what was going on... well, I'm not sure what to say to that. Hopefully she won't press for details!
Good luck!
2006-07-21 12:16:55 · answer #1 · answered by TravelOn 4 · 7⤊ 2⤋
Well, this happened to us once. We thought the door was locked, but to our surprise it was not. We thought and thought what we were going to say to this child as she was also very frightened to think that daddy was hurting mommy. Well here is what we ended up doing and it worked for us and didn't have to tell her what we were really doing.
We were in the living room one day (this was rehearsed), we decided to kind of reenacted so to speak what the child had saw prior. Daddy and mommy got down on the floor started "wrestling" around, fully clothed of course. The child wanted to know why daddy was hurting mommy again. Daddy then said, daddy is not hurting mommy, we are just playing,"wrestling" around. The child then started to laugh thinking it was funny as well when they realize that daddy was not hurting mommy.
Needless to say, from that point on, we made SURE the door was locked!
We wanted to do it this way as we was not quit ready for our child to know about sex just yet. And it did work for us!!
Oh and one other thing, if you so tell this child that you are trying to make them a brother or sister, or this is how you make babies, that child with it being that young will be waiting on a brother or sister. So unless you plan on having another child any time soon, that would not be a good thing to say.
2006-07-21 19:36:22 · answer #2 · answered by SapphireB 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You just have to give her the "when a mommy and daddy love eachother speech" but u should probably let ur wife do most of the talking, u all need to sit down together as a family and explain t0 her what u were doing and why. It's the only way because she was probably really scared and confused when she saw that!! U have to explain to her that u weren't hurting mommy, that that is just what 2 grown ups do once they are married because they love eachother!!
GoOd LuCk!!
dEbBiE, 16
cHiCaGo iLLiNoiS
2006-07-21 19:20:42 · answer #3 · answered by deby r 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yikes! Definitely something mommy should deal with. Your daughter will have an easier time believing her mother that she is not being hurt, and as long as she explains that it is something that mommies and daddies do when they love each other, she will be fine. Depending on your relationship with her, it couldn't hurt to have both of you in on the discussion, but your wife should do the explaining in her own special mommy way.
2006-07-21 19:17:52 · answer #4 · answered by Tara H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WHOOPS!...
Please do not make a big issue over it! You are not the 1st and won't be the last parents that this has happened to, by all means try to be more cautious in the future, but don't beat yourself up over it. If you and your wife have a loving relationship (out of the bedroom) I really don't think she will be scarred for life! NOW get off the computer and get your hiney over to "Lowe's" and buy a lock for that door!
2006-07-21 19:43:11 · answer #5 · answered by Linda 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Next time you plan on having an intimate session, keep your door locked. In the meanwhile, explain to your daughter that you were not hurting her mom, and how much you love both your daughter and wife.
2006-07-21 19:22:51 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOU BIG DUMMY. Lock the door next time.
YOu should drop the subject, she was obviously traumatized by it and doesn't want to process it now. If at some time she brings it up to you or wife, then explain to her that you were not hurting her mother, but making her a little brother.
Good Luck
2006-07-21 19:17:45 · answer #7 · answered by snvffy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since your daughter felt that mum was the victim maybe its best that mum sat sown with her and explained that you were not hurting her so she can feel at ease. It would be difficult to explain in any other way as she is far to young to be told about the birds and the bees at this stage.
2006-07-21 19:22:17 · answer #8 · answered by mermaiden_4_ever 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was about that age when I walked in on my parents by mistake. My mother talked to me and told me that everything was okay, that they were playing. Now wither or not the child believes her I couldn't say. But she will hear about that stuff soon enough at school, kids talk about a lot amongst themselves.
2006-07-21 19:29:09 · answer #9 · answered by Jeannie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mommy needs to explain that she wasn't being hurt. And you two need to learn to lock the door in the future. Why chance scarring your child for the rest of her life???
2006-07-21 19:15:59 · answer #10 · answered by pizzagirl 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋