If you don't, how do you think your children respond to listening through the door (cause you know they do!) as opposed to seeing your faces and body language so they can determine the severity of the disagreement. Now, I am not talking about abusive arguing (name calling, cursing or negetive physical contact), I am talking about a disagreement and working it out through conversation that may get passionate.
2006-07-21 10:40:32 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
children should know that mommy and daddy argue sometimes but that it does not mean that you are going to leave each other. they should know that we are imperfect and we will argue sometimes.
2006-07-21 10:50:08 · answer #1 · answered by lover of Jehovah and Jesus 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
OK, I know I'm not a parent, but I couldn't resist. My parents used to fight all the time in front of me when I was a little girl. See, the problem was, when they were both home, so was I... so whenever they fought, I unfortunately was there. And it really doesn't help when parents go into their bedrooms close the door & fight, because the kids can still hear it, but they can't see it, so it can cause their imaginations to run wild - not in a good way. It used to scare me more when my parents faught behind closed doors. And if they waited to fight when I was sleeping, I had the bedroom next to theirs, so I could hear it through the walls regardless of if the doors were open or shut. Parents need to be able to go somewhere where they can have their arguements or disagreements away from their children, but its hard to do when you have small children, you can't just leave the kids at home alone & go out somewhere & argue, due to safety issues.
2006-07-21 15:16:51 · answer #2 · answered by Tory 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Story time! When i was about 6 yrs old, my Father, bless his soul, drank a lot and would come home and the fighting with Mom began. Me and my sister would lie awake in bed and choke the tears away and not cry so we could hear what was going on. We always feared that Dad was going to really hurt Mom someday. I would slowly creep to the stairs and push my face up to the rungs on the railing to try to see what was going on. I have this scar that will never leave me. It is almost bringing tears to my eyes now as I type, but I realize now that Dad was a drunk and Mom was the enabler. My Father quit drinking. I always thought he did it for Mom, or himself. Well, he did do it for himself, but he did it for us. Mom saw me once and followed me to my room and saw the tears and the fear that was within myself and my sister. I asked my Mother if I did something wrong and will i still be allowed to live here, and that was about the end of the arguments. I got used to the "new" fighting. It was communication at it's best. Discussing the problems instead of yelling. I may not be a parent, but I do know that if you do argue, make it a discussion, not a yelling fest. That is just like a fist to the face and it burns a scar into the heart.
2006-07-21 10:53:01 · answer #3 · answered by jkcmr2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I really try to keep out disagreements for when the kids are in bed. The rooms are so far apart that they can't hear, but we RARELY , if ever get loud anyway. I really want my kids to see me respect my DH and support his decisions. This isn't a submissive thing. It is more because I am the one that they see make decisions most of the time because he is working. When he is around, I want them to know that I value his opinion too. Also, young kids get scared by parents not getting along, especially with the high divorce rate. They pick up on it early at school.
I am very blessed to have a marriage where there isn't a lot of disagreeing going on.
2006-07-21 11:20:41 · answer #4 · answered by 1hotmama5 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am such a well balanced person, I rarely have cause to argue with anyone. My wife and I have been married for over 38 years and have only had 2 arguments. They were both incredibly petty and stupid. We have always had excellent communications and have always given each other all the room and support to live our lives together, while having separate interests. Plain respect is vital.
2006-07-21 10:46:30 · answer #5 · answered by thebushman 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband and I do, but I don't like to. Afterwards we explain to the kids that we love each other and just had a disagreement. They understand it well enough now that when we start, they will tell us to stop fighting. It's a good clue for us to tone it down and find a more peaceful way to solve our differences.
2006-07-21 10:46:00 · answer #6 · answered by e_imommy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO! My parent's argued in front of me all the time and I hated it. I will not even argue behind closed doors for that matter. Me and my hubby take a ride and talk it out instead of screaming. No child should have to hear their parent's argue.
2006-07-21 17:52:58 · answer #7 · answered by domestic?goddess 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My daughter is too young for listening through doors. Most of the time that we argue my daughter is not around and we're on the phone or in the car. We don't tend to bring it home in front of her. We don't argue that much either.
2006-07-21 10:44:44 · answer #8 · answered by BbyGrl80 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As long as there is no cursing, abusiveness, etc, I don't see a problem. Children have to know that everything is not perfect all the time.
2006-07-21 10:43:34 · answer #9 · answered by jennymustafa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes! and it devestated(sp?) him. I was so mad at myself for loosing control like that in front of him. But I think you have to talk to your kids and be real with them, everyone has confrontations, but it is how we resolve them that wins the arguement. And if your kids know you love them and that no harm will come from voicing your opinion IN A POSTIVE WAY, it's all right
2006-07-21 10:49:37 · answer #10 · answered by justme 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband and I argue quite often but our kids know that it's because of differing opinions and it's nothing to be worried about.
2006-07-21 16:01:42 · answer #11 · answered by Mollywobbles 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋