Here is the deal, I am having trust issues with women. As a man, I am an odd one, because sex really does not matter to me as is with the typical male. I am more into the mental stimulation and the more aesthetical sense of a relationship. However, even as that may be, I have been cheated on in many of my past relationships... Now i dont trust women at all... I am not or will I ever consider being Gay. I dont even tolerate being in the presence of another man... Anyhow, To trump all of my previous "issues", I am a shy person. Extremely reclusive. All of my past "romances" were either "Blind Dates" or the woman propositioned me... I am 27 and have yet to ask a woman out... And it is not only because I dont trust women, i am shy and reclusive... Is there something I could do to end all of this? I am on the brink of becoming a complete "hermit".....
2006-07-21 09:39:02 · 18 answers · asked by jinmetsu_rasetsu 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
BLAH BLAH BLAH... WELCOME TO OUR WORLD, BUT SERIOUSLY IT SEEMS TO ME AS IF YOUR LOOKING WAY TOO HARD STOP LOOKING SO HARD AND DON'T TRY TO DATE EVERY WOMAN YOU MEET START OFF AS BEING FRIENDS FOR REAL AND SEE HOW IT GOES MOST GREAT RELATIONSHIPS START OFF AS FRIENDSHIPS IN THE FIRST PLACE AND IF THE FIRST OR SECOND ONE DOESN'T WORK OUT DON'T SWEAT IT HEY EVERYBODY GETS REJECTED, IT BUILDS CHARACTER. GOOD LUCK!
2006-07-21 09:44:50 · answer #1 · answered by sky g 3 · 0⤊ 3⤋
like i told someone else, you need to get yourself out there. If you find a girl attractive talk to her. You need to boost your confidence. you can't trust blind dates. It is someone else's idea of who is right for you, not yours. it is good that sex doesn't matter to you as much as the mental part of a relationship. The right person for you, will respect that in you and won't go looking for a one night stand.
Don't become a hermit, you will become even more depressed than you already are. You don't have a girl now ( i think ) but think that if you become a hermit, will you ever have a girl again?? DON'T let that happen.
just because some of your other girlfriends cheated on you, does not mean that others will.
2006-07-21 10:23:45 · answer #2 · answered by Sweetie Pie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel your pain, on the trust issues as well as being shy. I have been cheated on in relationships too. Women are not all the same just similiar! Naw for real though, i'm a deep person too you are going to have to come out of whatever makes you so shy and non trusting. Spend sometime alone evaluating why that is. look at the kind of women that you like. did you treat them all the same? learn to get to know these ladies before you make another serious commitment.
2006-07-21 09:52:34 · answer #3 · answered by Esoteric 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't go threw life assuming everyone one is the same. You know the saying, when you assume, you are making and A$$-out of U 'n ME. I have also been cheated on by many of my past lovers. It is not fair to bring that distrust to your new relationships, but I'm not saying to forget about it, just make sure you learn from it. When you do bring the distrust to the new relationship, it will more then not, fail. It is hard to get close to someone who won't even give you a chance to be trusted. Maybe when you start distrusting someone, think to yourself, what did she do to lose my trust? Don't jump to conclusions. Try going by the facts instead of your emotions/feelings.
Why don't you ever ask girls out. The worst that is going to happen is they will say no. Rejection makes you stronger. And you never know, they might say yes!!! Goodluck, get yourself out there!
2006-07-21 09:45:19 · answer #4 · answered by Mandy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No don't become a hermit. First of all, let your lose. You seem more afraid than shy. You maybe getting cheated on because the women that you have dated in your past the past feels as if you wouldn't approach them about cheating because of your shyness. Start speaking up and show some muscles in that attutide.
2006-07-21 09:46:53 · answer #5 · answered by tyte31 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should seek out professional counseling. Perhaps if you take up east coast swing dancing, you'll meet a lot of people in a non-threatening environment. You need to ask yourself what led to the cheating. If you always do what you always did, you'll always get what you always got. If you meet someone, don't just instantly go steady with them. It takes you off the market and you don' t know them that well. After months of dating, that's another story. Good luck. If you're shy, you'll need to ask why? Are you afraid of getting hurt? Not knowing how to act? Get feelings of yourself by others' reactions to you?
2006-07-21 09:44:14 · answer #6 · answered by Tony T 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Women are always trouble. But, they say the same thing about men. there really isnt a way to go about trying to figure them out. Dont hate them because of the past. Trust me, im a guy. I love women. But, think about it homey. Maybe the bachelor is the way you should go. Before you start mashing on women, ask yourself, is it you.
2006-07-21 09:44:03 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps your problem concerns the choices of women that you choose to be with.
It might help to be honest with yourself and do some soul-searching to find out what attracts you to certain women and why. You may be very surprised that there is a destructive pattern going on in regards to your choices of women to get involved with.
2006-07-21 10:27:35 · answer #8 · answered by JEFFAVEGRL 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hun not all women are the same some of us do know how to be loyal so if u caught one cheating kick her to the curb and move on with your life. Some women are just shady like that and that way you know what signs to look for i mean if your new gf is not exhibiting those signs then u should be able to trust her i mean if her main focus is on you then you should know that she wants to be with you and only you.
2006-07-21 09:44:26 · answer #9 · answered by psycholilblondegirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah, you can. Its the same with a girl losing trust after being cheated on. Its easier said than done, but get out to the bars, a church function, even do online dating.
2006-07-21 09:42:33 · answer #10 · answered by lonely_dove04 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
yea im in the same boat. ive been cheated on by guys and its hard for me to trust them.
but not all of us women cheat. you just need to find the right women. just go out and talk to women.
good luck
2006-07-21 09:45:07 · answer #11 · answered by broken_hearts07 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋