How come not many people understand self-injury?

Question

Okay so I'm a cutter. Call me sick, emo, whatever. But why don't alcoholics or drugs users get the same response? It seems that everyone actually acknowledges they have a problem. But people look at cutters and think that we're just doing it for the attention and the like. Well FYI not all of us are. I know there are some people who really do understand and kudos to everyone who does. Why is it so hard to understand?

I am trying to recover ... it's been a long hard journey so far and it's far from over. But I've got a lot of people who help me

I'm really not looking for attention or to justify what I do. I was just wondering...

Answer 1

The main reason most people don't understand is because this disorder, which is a real illness, has only come to light over that last 8 to 10 years. It is very hard for your average person to wrap their mind around the concept that people who hurt themselves on purpose, (usually to relive the stresses of their lives) aren't trying to kill themselves, so they prefer to think it's to gain attention rather than admit it's a true illness, I know something about this, one of my sons isn't a cutter, he's a burner, you should see his scars. God bless you honey and I hope you find a good doctor to help you overcome whatever is causing this very real problem.

Answer 2

My opinion on it (yes i cut) is some of us are obiously hurt emotionally and we cannot trust anyone and/or everyone and we are afraid of being hurt again, so we hold in all these dark feeling and hurt ourselves and soon enough if u dont get help imediatly it later becomes an addiction like being an alcoholic or a drug user. i dont know the stats on how many are seeking attention but they say that if they are going this far to get attention then they really do need it so dont tell them how dumb and wrong it is...we already know that, they are just looking for someone to trust and be open with about there life because maybe they havent ever had that chance yet in there life and all they have expirenced is hurt and let down...broken trust. Anywho me blabbing on about nothing here. I think most people look at it as "gothic" because means we are holding in all the pain, fear, guilt, and whatnot we get to be more towards the "dark" side and dress dark. some may not but i do...its not a pretty sight when someone finds out about it, people tend to "freak out!" and u just say why do u care? and walk away...i wish everyone could just understand everything about life...it would be sooo much easier to live that way!

Answer 3

I have a friend how used to be a cutter (I really don't know if she still does it) but I have to admit that at first I thought that she was insane. After a week I just thought what I was doing was wrong I was discriminating her without a reason, but though I didn't wanted to understand what she was going through because it was like a great impact to see those deep cuts on her arm. But you know after while I realised of what she was going through and decided to accept the way she was and try to help her. I really got to say that many ppl don't get it because its something that they haven't experienced maybe a bad moment of their lifes or something else and the cutting for me it's kind of new compared to the time of drugs and alcohol and also because the cutting is something that you can see there a deep scar in the arm but drugs and alcohol the injuries are inside so to see healing flesh is more like a show off, something you can see not like the other stuff but unfortunately ppl think its like to stand out when maybe it's a way to self injure without wasting money, etc. I'm not a professional but this is my personal opinion. Nowadays I look cutters with different eyes.

Answer 4

I know what you're saying. My father is an alcoholic, and I could never understand why he would want to drink and get drunk all the time. Since I do not drink I don't get how you could become addicted. On the other hand, I completely understand cutting. I was there once, in the same mind frame that you are. I didn't do it to get attention and tried as hard as I could to not have people notice. I just figured that if I was going to have to suffer so much pain, I might as well be the one doing it. I could control the physical pain that was caused by me, but I could not control the emotional pain that others were inflicting upon me. I do not do that anymore and I hope that you really try and get help. I have severe scars now, and there are other ways to vent your frustration and deal w/ your pain. Please look into counseling. I'm much happier now and what you think you're going through is not that bad to harm yourself in such a way. I thought my life was over, it had just begun. There are much worse things in life. Trust me, I've been through those things too. Be strong.

Answer 5

It's not for us to understand an addiction, as much as it is for the person who has the addiction to understand why they're doing it. Everyone does something for a reason, no matter what that thing is. We work for several reasons, the first is to get money, but not everyone needs to work for those reasons. You cut for a reason. Since cutting isn't what the mainstream calls "normal", you are looked upon as weird, strange, sick or some other such adjective. Why you do it goes much deeper than that. You might not even really know why you cut, but somewhere, there's a reason. I used to date losers. Why? Because I didn't want to be alone. But, I told myself that I was just having fun. I didn't realize the truth until I had something much better than I had ever had before. Then, I could see what I had been doing to myself. No one pushed it on me. I did it to me. No one could take responsibility for it, even though I used to try to blame it on my circumstances. All blame aside, it was purely selfishness on my part. I wanted what I wanted and I got it. What's to understand? People called me names, but I told myself that I didn't care, or they were wrong 'cause they didn't understand. I had tunnel vision and could n't see what it was doing to me. I also didn't have the maturity to look into my future and see how that would make a difference. Because I did what I did, I possibly poisoned my blood, and every other organ I have, with Hepatitis B. Now I can't be a donor, in any way. So you see, what you do to yourself can bite you in the backside in the future. We can't see the future, and that's a good thing. We can't see how our actions now will affect the future in some way. So while it's not up to us to understand you, you're the one who must deal with this. Actually, I consider all addictions in the same light. I used to drink and do drugs. But, what I did with the other stuff ended up being more destructive, in my case. It affected my desire to give my blood and donate my body parts to those who need it. Your cutting may limit your future desires in some way. I don't know what that would be, but thinking about the reasons behind your actions would be a good thing right now. But, if it's still working for you, there's nothing anyone can say to make a difference. <*)))><

Answer 6

It is so hard to understand because it is not normal and I for one am not going to normalize it for you by helping you find a way to justify what you are doing.

do you want to be 'understood ' so that you can have justification for what you are doing or do you want help and want to stop?? Just so you know, that is the same response I would give to a druggie or an alchoholic. But to be honest with you I don't see a lot of druggies and alchoholics posting questions like that so this question seems to be at the very least a cry for attention. Obviously you know there is something wrong with cutting yourself- the only extent that I would want to understand it is to help someone that really wanted to quit, quit- not to justify it and say they have good reason. I have been molested, abused mentally, emotionally and physically by my parents and others- so I know full well what pain is- I have not led a "charmed" life. So what on earth could be so bad for you, except you are crying for help and attention that you would do this?

Answer 7

I would like all cutters to read and also check out site, I am not one but do know it is not for attaintion in some cases.
What Is Cutting?
Injuring yourself on purpose by making scratches or cuts on your body with a sharp object - enough to break the skin and make it bleed - is called cutting. Cutting is a type of self-injury, or SI. Cutting is more common among girls, but guys sometimes self-injure, too. People may cut themselves on their wrists, arms, legs, or bellies. Some people self-injure by burning their skin with the end of a cigarette or lighted match.

When cuts or burns heal, they often leave scars or marks. People who injure themselves usually hide the cuts and marks and sometimes no one else knows.

Self-injury is not new. It's also not a very common behavior. But lately people are talking about it more. As guys and girls hear about cutting, they may feel curious about it and why people do it. Because it seems a little bit forbidden, some younger teens may think that cutting might make them seem daring, grown up, or popular.

With all the talk about it, cutting can almost seem like the latest fad. But cutting is a serious problem.

Why Do People Cut Themselves?
It can be hard to understand why people cut themselves on purpose. Cutting is what experts call an unhealthy coping mechanism. This means that the people who do it have not developed healthy ways of dealing with strong emotions, intense pressure, or upsetting relationship problems. READ ALL AT LINK

http://www.kidshealth.org/teen/your_mind/mental_health/cutting.html

Answer 8

I can truthfully say I don't understand self-injury. I am NOT calling you a sicko, or making fun of you in any way. I know it's a pshchological issue, and I sincerely hope you are getting the professional help you need. To answer your question though: I think the reason it is so hard for people to understand is because so few people ever encounter it. Could it be that if you begin educating people about this, it could help you to overcome/control it?

Answer 9

Self mutilation, compulsive skin picking are both forms of Psychogenic Excoration. In the mental health field, we have difficulty with diagnosing this problem because #1 it is not recognized in the DSM-IV, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. Recent studies have come to two conclusions, that either cutting is a Impulse Control Disorder, and the individual is unaware of the cutting until it is too late, and does it unconsciously (which I personally do not believe). Or, the second conclusion is that cutting is a form of an Obsessive-Compulsive disorder, where the individual is attempting to alleviate feelings through pain. Or, with compulsive skin picking, the individual is attempting to remove a flaw (for example) from their face that only they can see. Therefore, they pick, and pick and pick, until huge open sores have formed. With cutting, I through my experience in counseling others, find that many, especially teenagers, cut when experience emotional upset to a stressor. I found that behavioral therapy, coupled with the appropriate psychotropic drug helped alleviate cutting to a degree. However, with behavioral therapy, the goal is to help the individual find alternatives to cutting, and make the conscious choice to stop. I understand what you are going through, and I do hope you seek the appropriate mental health counseling you need to help you stop this cutting behavior.

Answer 10

I wonder that too, if there are so many of us, why are looked upon as so different? Most who SI keep it hidden therefore no one knows how many actually do it. As we grow up, most are taught that pain is a bad thing. Some kids are spanked or worse, while growing up portraying that pain is not good. We put bandages on wounds, we go to the doctor when we are sick and the hospital when we are badly hurt. Kids know pain is bad, and that follows us throughout our lives. People who SI twist and turn this knowledge of pain to please themself. But a lot of people still don't understand how people can turn something they were taught was "bad". Into something enjoyable and "good"