For Pastors or anyone really involved in the Church....?

Question

I met some one on Yahoo answers and he is having some problems with sinful sexual habits. I told him I would ask for help for him so here I am. He wants to stop doing this action but can't seem to stop. Please if you don't have any real advice don't answer this question. And please don't load me down with bible verses for i have already given him some. He is Muslim and I'm not sure if he understood what I was trying to tell him. (Any Muslims answering please give me verses from your bible.)

Thank you to everyone who answerd. It really helped. :)

Answer 1

Hello c4c. It sounds like your friend has a real problem. I am a trustee for my church. However, as a Muslim, your friend has a different set of beliefs then most other religions. The best honest advice I can give him would be to seek counseling from a professional and seriously pray about it. Years ago I found myself in a somewhat similar situation. However, I discovered what my problem really was were the women the type of women I had been dating. Although I was saved and wanted to live my life in a manner that was pleasing to God, I found myself in relationships with women who didn't. After coming to this realization, I started dating only christian women who were serious about God and thought along the same lines as I did. After taking this action my problem was resolved. I am not sure what your friends situation exactly is but I am sure one of these things can greatly improve it. Abstinence is hard and as human beings we cannot do it alone. It is only when we gain a better understanding of ourselves and dedicate ourselves to loving and serving the Lord is when we can presever. I will be praying for both you and your friend. Keep on being a good friend. God Bless.

Answer 2

Alhamdu'lillah (thanks be to God) that you are helping your friend get through a tough time!

If he is Muslim he should be able to contact his Imam to get some advice for this problem... but if he is embarrassed or that's not an option, tell him to read Holy Quran when he has the urge to do these things. Focusing on Allah and his blessings may be enough to help him fight the temptation. If not, I would tell him to consider counseling from a trusted professional.

Insha'allah (God-willing) his problem will become nothing if he seeks the proper guidance.

Answer 3

Since he is Muslim it could be either masturbation or homosexuality. Islam tends to very puritanical about "sins of the flesh".

If his problem is the former, then the old standbys usually work. Lots and lots of strenuous exercize, cold showers and start looking for a wife.

If it's the latter, I recommend he leave everything and everyone, change his name, convert to Christianity and join a church that welcomes gays. And never tell his family. They slaughter gays, doncha know; after they geld 'em.

Answer 4

If he is having problems controlling his sexual urges, I would recommend professional counseling. Most healthcare facilities have a behavioral health center that offer services for people suffering from all manner of compulsive behaviors--sexual deviancy included. Speaking with a licensed psychologist can help him understand his problem, as well as offer some useful tools to help him control his urges. If his problem is of a criminal nature (pedophilia, et. al), professional help is imperative.

Religion is all well and good, but it doesn't offer the kind of support and rehabilitative tools that a licensed psychologist can provide.

Answer 5

To change any habit, you must substitite a healthy one for the unhealthy one. He could pray when he felt these urges. He could go for a walk or do exercise. Or, the old standby, a cold shower. He could also try the AA 12 Step Program.

Answer 6

To refrain from any sinful habit a person's desire to do better has to be greater than their desire to sin.
Simply saying to someone that you want to stop your sinful behavior isn't going to do much good.
The real question is:
What steps have you taken to position yourself not to be in an environment of temptation?
It's difficult but with prayer it can be done.

Answer 7

ok...

My recommendation -- is for him to do the following...

1. He has to decide if he truly wants to stop the sin.

2. He has to decide what price he is willing to pay to stop the sin (the price is discipline).

3. Identify the situations that lead to this sin. Avoid those situations.

4. Identify the people that influence him to this sin. Avoid those people. Remove/stop all contact with them.

5. Commit his life to Jesus Christ ...

If he repents of his sins and turns to Jesus in sincerity and humility, Jesus will forgive him.

For a brief explanation of the gospel (of salvation through Jesus Christ), see http://www.godsci.org/gs/new/essence.htm...

6. Pray daily to the Christian God to protect him from temptation.

7. Live in daily relationship with the Christian God.

--

My recommendation to you -- as a woman -- do not get involved with this guy -- direct him to Christian guys if he wants to get out of sexual sin -- many men will try to talk with women about sexual stuff -- not because they want to get out of sexual sin -- but rather because there is a sexual pleasure that arises (for many men) out of talking with women about sex and sexual sin etc.

Cordially,
John

Answer 8

Asking for help is as as easy as a prayer. I will pray. Thank you for caring. He needs to seek pastoral counseling. I don't know if his faith has something that simple to seek out or not but prayerfully he will find someone with Godly wisdom to talk to about his situation. Blessings and prayers =)

Answer 9

He needs to allow Jesus to live in His heart. He just needs to admit that Jesus died for his sins and he needs to ask Him for help. I was involved in a very sinful lifestyle before I got saved. Drinking heavily, habitual illegal drug use, promiscuity. I asked Him for the strength to resist these things, YOU CANNOT DO IT ALONE. That's the main reason God allowed Christ to die for us. So we could reach out and ask for help. He wants us to ask for help. He gives us strength that we never knew we had. I still sin, I am not perfect, but I am now able to make conscious decisions and seek guidance when "that still small voice" inside of me tells me right from wrong. One small thing God did was take away my craving for cigarettes. I have not smoked ONE cigarette in 5 years, nor had a craving. I had smoked for 15 years until then.
GOD BLESS

Answer 10

Funny you should ask this question...this past wednesday night I touched on this very topic with my youth group.
I am not sure what the Quran teachs but it applies to his/our life and morals.
In anything we do from prayer to our personal life and in our sins we need self-control, that is one thing we most lack along with lack of Faith, Moral and Values. Gpd said if we lack any of these things to ASK him for it. We dont have it because we dont ask God to give it to us.
Whatever his Sin is it not pleaseing God or Allah. Pray for him and tell him.
And we will pray for him in the name of Jesus